Page 233 of Shadowblood Souls: The Complete Series

“You were right,” I say to Rollick. “I can take from shadowkind. It was a little hard getting started, but I think it’d be easier now that I know what to expect.”

“Good to have the confirmation, although it seems unlikely that our main foe will have many if any shadowkind still on his side.” Rollick glances at Riva. “The most important test is how quickly and effectively you can drain a fellow shadowblood.”

My pulse stutters. Of course Riva isn’t here just to offer moral support—she’s another target.

The thought shouldn’t horrify me as much as it does. I didn’t flinch when I watched her inflict her talent on Jacob and Zian. But then, she obviously balked at doing it.

I once pieced this woman back together from the brink of death. I’ve refused to sacrifice any part of my talent or the monstrous appendages that come with it so that I can be ready whenever she needs me again.

Nothing could feel more wrong than to steal any of the life I’ve preserved so carefully away from her.

Riva takes the same spot Lance did. She smiles at me without any sign of concern. “I’ll be fine. I’ve got lots of strength. And every time I use my power, I replenish it.”

I don’t really think I could hurt her badly by accident. My mind can’t even wrap itself around the idea. But nausea bubbles in my gut just at making myself pretend that I’m going to attack her.

I close my eyes for a second. This is for her too, isn’t it?

To make sure I’ll be prepared to defend her from every enemy we might encounter in the days ahead… including the ones with shadows in their blood like us.

I hold on to that justification and fix my gaze on Riva. My tentacles extend toward her.

Memories of much more pleasant encounters tickle up in the back of my mind. The first time she kissed one of my suckers… The way she’s accepted my tentacles right inside her…

I shut down that line of thinking before my face can flush too much and yank myself back to the present. All I need is a little tug of energy out of her. Just enough to tell if it’ll be much more difficult than I expect.

I’m aware of her presence in multiple ways—the quiver of connection through our marks, the tingle of the talents she could lend me, and the pulse of life resonating through her body. I narrow my attention down to the last of those and ever so tentatively pull.

Energy flares into my chest with a hitch of my heart. I drop my tentacles before Riva can do more than rasp a breath, my throat choking up. “I’m sorry—it was even faster than?—”

“Hey, I’m okay.” Riva hurries over to me and grasps my arm. There’s still color in her cheeks; her eyes still shine as vividly as I’m used to. “It was just a little jab. I’ve felt way worse.”

Rollick cocks his head. “You drew on her energy more easily than with a regular human?”

I nod. “That felt more natural than even siphoning from the plants, especially considering the distance.” I pause in queasy contemplation. “But I don’t know if that’s because we’re both shadowbloods or because of the other connections we’ve formed.”

Sorsha, who’s watched most of the demonstration in silence, raises her eyebrows. “The six of you who grew up together are all pretty tightly connected now, aren’t you? We don’t have any other shadowbloods like you around, but you could give a different sort of hybrid a try.” She spreads her arms.

She talks as casually about it as Lance did, but I can’t help asking, “Are you sure?”

After seeing her phoenix fire consume Balthazar’s villa in a matter of seconds, I definitely do not want to piss this woman off.

Sorsha laughs. “That’s what we’re here for. I’m kind of curious how it feels.”

She walks over to the target spot, and I cautiously lift my tentacles again. The warble of her body’s energies does feel pretty similar to Riva’s, although with a deeper crackle of power that sends goosebumps rippling up my arms.

I reach and take an even smaller gulp now that I’m prepared. Sorsha gives her body a little shake. “That wasn’t bad at all.”

Rollick is studying me. “Still easier?”

“Yeah.” I look down at my tentacles as they coil closer around my shoulders. “I guess the shadowblood energy matches the best with my own, so it’s the simplest to take in.”

“Sounds like as good an explanation as any.” Rollick gives me another crooked smile. “Somehow I’m guessing you’d rather not extend the practice beyond our initial experiments.”

God, no. “I think I’ve got a pretty good idea of what to expect just from that,” I say diplomatically.

“All right. There’s one other matter I’d like to talk with you about, just the two of us.”

Riva shoots him a curious glance, but she heads back to the house without complaint. Rollick’s done more than enough to earn all of our trust.

Sorsha ambles off with Lance, motioning toward his clawed hands. “So, I’m assuming you don’t attend a whole lot of tea parties…”

Rollick waits until they’re all out of hearing. I assume he can tell whether there are any shadowkind nearby in the shadows too, although maybe he doesn’t care about some of them overhearing.

“I’ve been thinking about the problem of your tentacles,” he says.

I instinctively reach toward my shoulder, toward the spot on my back just below where one of the two tentacles spouts. Something about his phrasing, calling them a “problem,” itches at me. “What about them?”

“It’s odd that the others haven’t experienced any kind of growth when they’ve experimented with borrowing your power. From what I’ve gathered, you didn’t always have those appendages, did you?”

I shake my head. “They emerged about three years ago.”

Rollick taps his lips. “And you could draw energy to heal before that. They weren’t necessary.”

“Well, no.” I hesitate. “But my powers got stronger after they came out. I don’t know if that’s because of them or if it would have happened anyway.”

“They do make a regular life blending in among mortals difficult,” the demon says. “Nearly as much as those claws of Lance’s. I told you before that we could attempt cutting them off but that there was a reasonable chance they’d simply grow back.”

The itch expands into a creeping sensation over my skin. “I decided it wasn’t worth trying.”

“Yes. But having worked together some more with our phoenix, it occurred to me—I think it’s likely Sorsha could use her supernatural fire to permanently burn them away. If you wanted that.”

My heart all but stops. It takes me a few seconds to recover my voice. “I—I mean, I might need them in the battle?—”

Rollick waves his hand dismissively. “Yes, of course. I didn’t mean right away.

But after we’ve dealt with this Balthazar and whatever’s left of the Guardianship if necessary, when I’d hope you six can go on to lead relatively peaceful lives…

I thought you should know the option is on the table.

So you can take your time considering it.

It sounds as if you could assume you’d keep some—if not all—of your actual powers. ”

To shed this very literal weight off my back—to feel fully human again on the outside if not the inside… There’s no energy I could siphon that could bring the same thrill as that thought.

But it comes with a starker uncertainty that sinks through my abdomen. Without the tentacles, I might only be capable of the relatively minor healing I could pull off as a kid and teenager.

Would that be so awful, if we weren’t fighting battles where my friends might take near-fatal injuries?

Can I even really hope that we’ll finally get the kind of peace where giving them up wouldn’t feel like a huge risk?

Before I can prod at that question much further, a curvy figure bursts out of the shadows with a jostle of blond curls. Pearl grins up at Rollick with an eager but urgent air.

“Toni gave them the push they needed!” she crows. “We’ve got them! The Guardianship is making their plans for Balthazar—and he’s agreed to meet them tomorrow.”