Page 122 of Serpent In White

“I’m wearing boxers and a t-shirt,” I grumble, crawling over to my sleeping bag and climbing inside. “I’m notnaked.”

She turns onto her side to face me. “What wouldDarianthink?”

Even hearing his name twists my stomach up into a knot. “I miss him.”

She lifts her brow. “You’ve been away from him for two days.”

“I know. It’s crazy.” I pull the sleeping bag up to my chin as my eyes stay locked with my new friend’s. “I don’t want to keep us a secret anymore. I want… I want to love him out in the open.”

“Why can’t you?” She asks, curious.

“It’s very complicated.”

“Since he’s the leader?”

“Well, yea… And for other reasons.”

She blinks. “Like what?”

I already know she’ll be judgmental over what I’m about to say, but I need to talk to someone. I haven’t been able to tell any of my friends or family about my relationship with Darian, and it’s eating me alive inside. Regardless of what Rhiannon says, she’s impartial, and she’s a friend.

I need to get this off my chest.

“He’s… married,” I tell her, and immediately, her face contorts like she’s trying not to react.

Unfortunately, I can hear her thoughts, and they’re not very supportive.

Married?? Why am I not surprised…? This guy is certainly shoving himself into that typical, chauvinistic, narcissistic cult leader box, isn’t he? I really hope Abdiel smartens up and stands up for himself to thisHead Priest.

“And let me guess, he thinks it’s okay to be with multiple people at once?” She mutters, her skepticism on full force.

“Well… not exactly.” I chew on my lip. “I mean… it’s—”

“Complicated. Yea, so you’ve said.” She rolls her eyes. “So he’s just going to stay married while he fucks you, and his husband, and everyone else he wants to fuck, should the mood strike?”

“No. No, that’s not it,” I reply, defensively. “He’s married to women, but he only did it to please the Regnum.” Her eyes glaze over. “Ourfamily. He’s never been with them romantically. He… can’t.”

Some sympathy shines in her eyes. “Because he’s gay?” I nod, and I see her losing some of the know-it-all frustration as she nods along. “Well, I can understand that.”

“It’s a tough situation,” I go on. “I don’t want to push him. It’s not my place, but I really want him to be happy. And if it’s with me, that would be an added bonus.”

“Abdiel, itisyour place to push, at least within reason.” She scoots in closer. “He involved you by sleeping with you. He put you in the middle, and now he has a responsibility to consider your feelings.”

“We haven’t slept together…” I mumble.

“What was that?” Her lashes flutter as if she didn’t hear me.

My cheeks flush, palpably. “We haven’t had sex yet. We’ve done other things, but… I’m still a… uh… a virgin.”

Rhiannon’s eyes go round, sparkling from the dim light of the flashlight I have on by my head. They’re very green, almost teal, like the lake in spring.

“Is he the only person you’ve been with?” She asks, her voice hushed, intimately wondering, as if she thinks someone might overhear, but she can’t not ask.

Images of Drake flit through my head, and I’m momentarily nervous until I remember she can’t hear my thoughts. But I can hear hers…

She’s turned on again, only this time it’s from thinking about me with Darian. She’s wondering what he looks like, thinking about if he’s rough or soft with me.

I can’t even pretend it’s not stiffening my dick in my sleeping bag, hearing someone else think about me and my Head Priest... together.