Page 106 of Serpent In White
“We’ll go to war if we have to.” I light my joint and take a drag, trying to remain as impassive as possible.
“Not everyone loves killing as much as you,” he murmurs, and I flinch.
That hurt.The truth usually does.
“I resent that.” I step closer to him. “I get shit done,Head Priest.” My fist pounds over my heart. “Iprotect this place.”I protect you from me.
Darian pushes into my space, the warmth of him immediately crowding me, though I don’t show it. “Why do you keep doing this? Why do you keep it going when you know you don’t have to? You’re damning yourself, Drake. It’s like you do it on purpose…”
“Iamdoing it on purpose,” I seethe in his face. “I do it because no one else will. It’s the balance, Darian, and you know it. You can keep telling yourself that’s not the case, but it fucking is. Just accept it so we can all be on the same page.”
“I don’t want to accept it,” he snarls with pain in his eyes. “I can’t. The natural order doesn’t have to involve you compromising yourself.” I scoff over his words, looking away, but he moves his face in front of mine again. “It doesn’t. You’re hiding… Using the drugs, the mountain… theevilas a crutch. A buffer so you don’t have to face the truth.”
“Oh yea? And what’s the truth, Darian?Hm??” If flames could come out of a gaze, they’d be doing it now, aimed right at my brother. “You think you know everything… Well, you don’t know shit. You have no idea the kinds of things I live with. What I live with!”
I back up before something bad happens, pacing about in my rage, the fury rippling off me in waves. I can feel it up here. The night gets darker, colder, and the leaves tremble the way my fingers are.
Darian looks up, looks around, at how the trees are moving and the sudden shift in the atmosphere. But he doesn’t appear scared or concerned. Not for himself…
He looks worried for me, sympathy shimmering in his blue eyes. They’re darker now, and I’m sure he’ll be craving soon. And I’ll shoot him up, like a fucking dealer, because it’s the last remaining connection I have to him.
Everything he just said is entirely true. Iamhiding. I’m hiding so much more than he even knows. But such is my burden. And he’s wrong about one thing…
I don’t have a choice.
“Thanks for coming up, brother,” I mumble, stomping out my joint and hopping onto my four-wheeler.
I don’t hesitate to start it up and peel off, leaving him alone in the dark.
Because I have to.
This is the creepiest forest I’ve ever been in.
I still can’t remember if I came here intending on killing myself, because by the time I got up here, close to the peak of this mountain, I’d convinced myself to do it.
It’s better this way.
These woods are already a little shady, what with all the strange noises; the endless quiet sprinkled with forest sounds, so unlike the bustle of Seattle it’s not even funny.
But the forest has strange feelings, too. Like itknowsyou the moment you set foot on its ground. It knows what’s inside your head and your heart, and it’ll play on that. For what reason, I’m not sure. But even if I hadn’t been dead set on killing myself when I left home last night, by the time I got settled up here, I was filled with the certainty that I need to die.
It’s the only way.
As if all of this isn’t creepy enough on its own, a tall boy emerged from the trees, scaring the ever-loving shit out of me. I jumped so hard I might have peed a little.Okay, that’s an exaggeration, but still. It was startling.
Peeking up at him from where he stands over me, I wipe my nose on the back of my hand. He doesn’t look scary at all, which is comforting. He’s actually… pretty damn beautiful.
Trying not to focus on that, I pull a scowl, looking away from him while I wipe under my eyes, attempting to rid the mascara smudges I just know are there. I don’t like how he’s just hovering over me while I sit on the ground. He’s like six feet, and while he doesn’t appear menacing, the way he’s towering over me is more intimidating than I enjoy.
“Go away,” I grumble, aiming my face at his boots, my hair hanging around it like a curtain so he can’t see me.
I’m such a child. As if me not seeing him means he can’t see me.
“Are you alright?” He asks, ignoring my grouchiness as he takes a seat on the ground, right in front of me.
That gets my face up. Our eyes meet, and I’m once again momentarily captivated by how gorgeous he is. He doesn’t even look real. Green eyes, a few shades darker than mine, dirty blonde hair in these lush curls that look softer than silk. A perfectly pointed nose, plump pink lips and a jawline that goes for miles.
I blink myself out of the fascination with this stranger and peer down at my hands, picking chipped nail polish from my fingernails. I didn’t come here to make friends, and I don’t want this kid sitting here trying to talk to me.
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