Page 46 of Search My Soul (Taylor Family Saga #3)

“You sound like a spoiled kid. My sisters aren’t worried about you. Now, hurry up because that lady over there looks like she’s ready to cuss both of us out, and I just got here. I don’t want to make a bad impression before I even meet them.”

“Man, fuck them. I don’t give a damn how anyone feels. I’ll walk right out of here if they try you.” I kissed her once more before heading over to the rest of the family.

“It’s about time.” Dreamier fussed. I flipped him off before getting in place.

Pure and I were the tallest ones in the family, so we always ended up in the back.

The photographer provided us with a few instructions before he began snapping photos.

After the third position change, I was over it, and the grumbles from my brothers let me know I wasn’t the only one.

“All right. Mrs. Taylor would like to take a photo with her grandsons,” the photographer instructed.

My nana looked amazing in her gown. I used to hear stories about how she and Poppa used to hold court in the streets.

They were the urban Bonnie and Clyde of their time, with a jail record to match.

One of the photographer’s assistants brought a chair for Nana to sit in while we stood behind her like her protectors. That’s exactly what we were.

Once we wrapped up with the photos, everyone dispersed, but Nana asked Pure and me to stay behind. I wondered what it was she wanted to talk about while silently praying it wasn’t about my parents. She took a moment to examine us, reaching out to fix the position of Pure’s tie and my handkerchief.

“When your father and uncles were born, I was so upset because I wanted girls. You can ask your great aunt, Aretha. I threw a fit every time the doctors told me it was a boy because I wanted someone I could dress up and play in their hair. I remember complaining about how I wanted a little girl, and one of my good friends checked me. She said the love of a son is the strongest, most unconditional love you’ll ever experience.

“Of course, I wasn’t tryna hear none of that shit because I wanted to wear matching dresses with my mini me.

When your grandfather went to prison on a gun charge, I was devastated.

What the hell was I supposed to do with three boys on my own?

Then I found out I was pregnant with your aunt, and I could barely even celebrate finally having a girl.

“I cried for the first week, barely wanting to get out of bed.

When I finally came to, I realized how blessed I truly was.

Your father stepped up at the age of twelve and took care of the house.

He got his brothers up every morning and walked them to school.

He helped around the house and comforted his brothers when they missed their father.

“He was always the quiet one, but his presence was powerful. When he grew up, things remained the same. He made an impact on so many without having to speak very many words. There was always a fire inside of him that I admired. No matter how difficult the situation was, it never stopped him. He was determined to conquer every obstacle set before him. My other sons swore your grandfather and I favored him, but it wasn’t like that at all.

He was just… unique. When people saw him, they gave him respect without him having to instill fear in them.

“It was the reason your grandfather felt confident to bring him into the organization, and just as we thought, he climbed the ranks without having to use our family name. The connects were impressed with him so much that they refused to deal with anyone besides your father and grandfather. I probably sound like I’m rambling, but there’s a reason I’m telling you this.

The same fire your father carried, I see inside of both of you.

Pure, you are quiet, but powerful. You don’t have to speak in order for people to give you respect because they can see that you are someone deserving of honor.

You are a leader in the business and within this family.

“Soul, you are so smart. You possess a keen business sense, enabling you to see things that others may overlook. You’re an observer, just like your father.

When your spirit doesn’t connect with someone, you keep them at a distance until you can figure them out.

You’re also fearless. You go into every situation with confidence, and it’s the reason why you continue to win.

The two of you are a powerful mixture of your father, even though you possess different parts of him.

“Your grandfather and I are getting older, and our health is declining day by day. I’m not telling you to scare you.

However, I want you to understand how vital the two of you are to this family.

I want to die with peace in my heart, knowing my family isn’t going to fall apart at the seams when I leave here. ”

“Come on, Nana. You know we don’t like?—”

“I don’t give a damn what you don’t like.

It’s the reality of life. Do you think I wanted to watch two of my children be lowered into the ground before me?

Life is unfair, but death is a guarantee.

I don’t ask for much, but I need you to promise me that you will keep this family together, not only in the business, but also at home.

You two will be the ones everyone looks to when we are gone.

I need you to assure me that you will continue to make us proud in death as you have in life. ”

These were the conversations I dreaded the most. It was too much to think about, and I refused to allow my mind to even think of it. As far as I was concerned, they were both going to outlive us all.

“You have to understand where we’re coming from, Nana.

We have already lost our parents, and while we’re not ignorant of the fact that y’all are aging, it doesn’t make these talks easier.

We love you, and we’re gonna do what needs to be done.

However, you can’t expect us not to react,” Pure explained.

I knew without a doubt I would be leaving after this, because this discussion ruined my mood.

“I know it’s hard, but these talks are necessary. We have a legacy to maintain, and there will be no room for tears and sadness. You already know what your grandfather would say.”

“Chin up, guns out. Ain’t no time for no weak shit,” Pure and I both recited simultaneously.

“That’s right. I trust you and I believe you can handle it. For now, I want to enjoy my days with my family, making memories.”

“Why are you making it sound like you’re about to die tomorrow?”

“No man knows the hour or the day, Grandson. Like I told you before, I want to plan everything so there are no misunderstandings about what I want.”

“We understand. We love you, Nana.”

“I love you too. Now, introduce me to this girl you’ve brought with you. I never thought I would see the day when you brought someone home. I might actually get some great-grandchildren from you after all,” she teased, causing my face to frown.

“Whoa. You’re getting a little ahead of yourself with that one. I care about her, but we’re not ready for babies yet.”

“Your father said the same thing.” She smirked, holding her hand out for me to take. I obliged before bringing her over to the table where the ladies were sitting. When Neeya spotted us coming toward the table, her eyes widened. I waved her over, but I noticed the fear in her eyes.

“Bring your scary tail on over here. I’m sure you aren’t afraid when you’re humping my grandson.

Come on over here, pretty girl.” Nana had always been a straight shooter and today would be no different.

Neeya smoothed her dress as if it would make a difference.

I still couldn’t get over how fine my baby looked.

Neeya possessed the kind of beauty that instantly elevated the person next to her.

She made me look better as she held onto my arm.

“Hi, I’m Neeya.” She wasn’t sure how to react because of the way Pure greeted her, but Nana didn’t play that.

“Girl, bring your tail over here and give me a hug,” Nana demanded.

Neeya hesitated, so I pressed my hand into her backside to give her a push.

When Nana wrapped her arms around her, I noticed her shoulders relax.

My nana was a true gangsta at heart, but she also possessed a calming spirit that would change any atmosphere she dwelled in.

I allowed the two of them to have their moment.

Pure stood by himself, and I debated on whether or not I would say anything to him.

I loved my brother, and there wasn’t anyone I trusted more than him.

However, we weren’t always on the best of terms. Still, I felt a pull to speak to him, so that’s what I did.

“You good?” I asked, allowing the awkward energy to surround us.

“I hate this shit.” I remained quiet to allow him space to express himself. We never spoke about our feelings, but just like Neeya could feel me, Pure and I possessed the same connection.

“It’s crazy, you know? You would think after all these years, this wouldn’t bother me.

Most people feel sadness at the thought of their parents’ death, but I’m angry.

The people who took them were people they trusted, and that alone sends me into a rage.

If I could dig those mothafuckas up so I could kill them again, I would.

” His thoughts mirrored mine because I would never fully accept it.

They were betrayed by the people they cared for and trusted, and they genuinely thought they would get away with it.

“Yeah, it’s crazy. I still have dreams about that night.

That was the day I stopped being a kid,” I admitted.

I could still recall how badly I spiraled when I found out about my parents.

The pain was indescribable, and then there was nothing but rage.

If I had to guess, it was probably the root cause of my temper.

I might have killed the people responsible, but it would never bring them back.

“Nana wants us to have kids, but to be honest, I don’t see that in my future. The last thing I want to do is expose my children to this life and put them in the position to experience what we did.”

“I understand what you mean, but I don’t see that shit happening. The people in our camp are solid, and even if they weren’t, we’re way too deadly to be caught slippin’,” I assured him, even though he gave me a lot to think about.

“How can you be so sure? You don’t think Pops believed the same thing?

I think about this shit all of the time.

It’s the reason I keep my distance from people, because what if we’re wrong?

All it takes is for us to underestimate one mothafucka and our whole organization could crumble.

” I stood there processing his revelation.

I trusted my instincts, but he made a valid point.

My parents thought that the people close to them undoubtedly loved them, but all it took was the right price.

I loved Duke and Murk like they were my blood brothers, and while I could never see them betraying me, I still remembered the look in Uncle Brent’s eyes when he took his last breath. There wasn’t a hint of remorse present.

“Yeah, you’re right. Huncho mentioned a private investigator looking into our files a while ago.

When I looked into it, I found out that the state wasn’t behind him being here.

He’s a one-man army, but he believes he can take us down.

I’ve had people trailing him, but it’s only a matter of time before he strikes, so we need to be ready,” I explained.

“Can you handle things, or do you need me to?”

“I’ve got it. I just want to make sure we’re all on the same page. Like you said, we can’t have any mishaps right now. Emilio and Salvador have been on my ass about this shooting situation, so I’m trying to figure that out too.”

“If you need my help, all you have to do is say the word,” Pure assured me.

“Yeah, I know. I’ve got it under control though.” The two of us stood there quietly observing our family. As much as I couldn’t wait to leave, it felt good having everyone together.

“Do you love her?” Pure’s voice broke the silence between us. I glanced over at Nana and Aunt Aretha on the dance floor with Juicy and my sisters. They were all smiling and having a good time. Seeing Juicy bonding with my family put a lot of things in perspective for me.

“Yeah, I do. It’s still pretty new, but she has my heart.” Pure nodded with his eyes still trained on them.

“Don’t fuck it up.” Pure and I never discussed relationships, so it took me by surprise.

“I don’t plan on it.” No other words were exchanged as he turned to walk away.

Instead of dwelling on my brother’s awkwardness, I decided to go grab my lady so we could make our way out of here.

Juicy coming here to support me meant more to me than I could express, but I was ready to go home.

I wanted to fuck my lady until we were both tired and listen to her snore until I fell asleep.

Things were changing in my world, but for once, I was excited to see how it would play out.