Page 39 of Ruin (Hell’s Mayhem MC: Maine Chapter #2)

“What a beauty,” Lucian says, and that’s when I notice the baby in his hands.

It’s small and most definitely not a boy.

The umbilical cord is still attached to something and he makes quick work of laying the little baby on a towel, suctioning her mouth.

I wait and wait for what feels like forever, but the cry doesn’t come.

It doesn’t fucking come…

Grizz and I share a look as Lucian mutters something to himself as he massages the baby’s chest, then picks it up and lays it face down on his arm.

He grabs the wet towel, squeezes it out, then massages its back with it for a moment.

I don’t think anyone in the room is breathing. Until finally, there it is.

The worst sound I’ve ever heard in my entire life. A newborn screech.

Anastacia gasps, then starts bawling her eyes out.

“Thank you,” Lucian whispers under his breath, shaking his head. “Thank you.”

He lays the baby down on the towel, then cuts the umbilical cord, which I completely ignore because it looks fucking gross. He wraps the baby in the towel and gets to his feet.

“Are you ready to meet your daughter?”

“A girl?” Anastacia cries. “Oh my God, it’s a girl.” She laughs, patting Grizz’s hand before reaching out to take the baby. She rests her small head on her chest, and Grizz looks down at her in awe. Hell, I’m in awe. She’s so small, and so cute with chubby cheeks and dark hair.

“I have to get the after birth out,” Lucian explains. “It’ll be uncomfortable but shouldn’t be painful.”

Anastacia doesn’t seem to hear him, but moves around uncomfortably a few times as he does what he needs to do. He’s massaging her stomach and pressing on it in places until I hear it plop into the bowl. I gag.

“You can try to feed her, if you like,” Lucian says, wiping his forehead with the back of his hand.

Anastacia nods, pressing a kiss to the tiny baby’s head.

“I need some air,” I comment as I get to my feet.

Lucian steadies me and smiles. “I’ll go with you.”

Grizz and Anastacia are fawning over the baby, not at all paying attention to us. Neither seems to remember the torment we all just went through, either.

When we get outside, Tommy is there, smoking a cigarette.

“May I have one?” I ask.

He chuckles, pulling the pack from his pocket and handing me one.

“Me too, if you don’t mind,” Lucian says.

Tommy gives him one as well, then hands me the lighter. After I light the cigarette, I pass it to Lucian.

I rarely smoke. In fact, I hate it. Most of the times I’ve done it have been when I’m absolutely shitfaced and hating my life more than normal. Right now, I’m just stressed the fuck out .

“I don’t know how you do that,” I say.

“It’s easy after you see so much death,” he comments. “It’s one of the good things about being a doctor.”

“Yeah, but it’s so…”

“Messy?” Lucian says with a chuckle. “All the beautiful things are.”

He holds my gaze, and there’s a knowing look there. I bring the cigarette to my lips, inhaling deeply before blowing out the smoke.

Can Lucian and I have something beautiful? I won’t know unless I try.

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Kolton

“What the fuck is up with you?” Shark asks as he drops down beside me with a plate full of eggs, bacon, and toast.

I glance at him, frown, then go back to my computer. “Nothing.”

“Bullshit.”

I roll my eyes. “Just eat your food and shut up.”

“I went by your house last night,” he begins, stabbing a chunk of eggs. I click on an open cell in my spreadsheet and type in $500.00.

“And?” I say casually, but I already know where this is going.

“And you weren’ t there.”

“I’m an adult, Shark. I can go where I want, when I want.”

“Yeah, but you weren’t here either.”

“What is your point?” I ask, getting frustrated now. I know what he’s trying to say. I know what he’s asking me. But it’s none of his business, so he can fuck right off.

“Were you with him?” he asks in a low voice.

“What does it matter to you?” I spit out, then snap my laptop shut and get to my feet.

Shark grips my wrist. “Be careful.”

“Fuck you, Kaison.”

I yank my arm from his grip and head down the hall into one of the offices so I can finish this work without being bothered.

I have a ton of things I need to put together for the next charity event we’re doing, and with Coyote suddenly giving me a hard time about it, it gives me more work and less time to do it since he has me on a ton of other shit.

But this is what I do. It’s how I get the community involved and how we show them we aren’t awful people—that we’re trying to do right here.

The door opens, and I groan as I look up, already knowing who it’s going to be.

“What the fuck, Kaison? Get out.”

He moves to stand in front of the desk, staring down at me.

“You need to be careful.”

Fuck, what is wrong with this guy?

“I don’t need to do anything. But you really need to fuck off and stop acting like Dad.”

He scoffs. “Don’t you see that’s the problem here? ”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

“He’s old enough to be your father.”

“I’m well past legal age.” I roll my eyes.

“He was friends with Dad,” Kaison growls.

“Maybe you should start worrying about your—”

His fist slams onto the desk, causing everything to rattle. “He was friends with Dad,” he says again, this time more slowly. And I think he’s trying to tell me something without saying it.

I fucking hate when people do that.

“Just spit it out, Kaison. What are you saying?”

“What he did to you…”

I can’t stop my eyes from going as wide as saucers. I should be grateful that my brother is concerned about me, but his allegations piss me the fuck off.

“Don’t you ever compare him to Dad,” I seethe.

“How could he be friends with someone like that? How can you be with someone who was friends with someone like that?”

“Because he doesn’t fucking know!” I shout, jumping to my feet. I hit the desk on the way up and it slides a few inches. “He doesn’t know,” I repeat, this time more calmly.

Now Kaison’s eyes widen, and he takes a step back. He blinks a few times, mouth parting and then closing again. “How?”

“What do you mean, how? Because I didn’t tell him—that’s how.”

“But you were with him then.”

“I told you things with Lucian and I started when I was nineteen. Dad was done with me by then. ”

His face twists into disgust. “Don’t say it like that.”

“Like what?” I bark. “Like I was a piece of trash he threw away? I mean, it’s what I was. The entire time. I was no son of his. Not like you.”

“Hey!” he bellows, pointing a finger at me. “That’s not my goddamn fault.”

“Didn’t say it was,” I respond. “But if the shoe fits.”

“Fuck you,” he growls. “Don’t you ever fucking talk to me like that.” He moves around the desk getting right in my face. “I don’t give a fuck how much I hated you when we were younger. You’re my brother. We’re family. Had I known what he was doing, I’d have shot him in his fucking sleep.”

A wave of emotion hits me, but I swallow it down. Maybe things would be different for me now if I had my brother on my side during it all. If I had told him what was going on, maybe we could have stopped it. But I was too afraid that Kaison wouldn’t believe me. Or worse, that he just wouldn’t care.

I throw my arms up and let them fall to my sides. “What do you want, Kaison?”

He sighs, running a hand through his hair. “I just want to make sure you’re okay.”

“Why do you suddenly care now?”

“I don’t know,” he snaps. “I just do, okay? Can’t that be enough? I can’t go back and fix things, so just let me be a big brother now.” There’s that emotion again. Hanging around in my throat and making it hard to breathe. “Please, Kolt. Let’s just… start over. ”

“Fine,” I manage to say, my voice raspy.

Kaison squeezes my shoulder, giving me a little shake. “I wanna hug you, but I won’t.”

I huff out a laugh. “Good choice.”

“I do need a favor though.”

“What?” I ask.

“Well, two things I guess.”

I raise a brow, waiting for him to continue.

“One, if he ever does anything to hurt you, you better tell me. Don’t let anyone treat you like shit.”

“That’s two things, and I know there’s another.”

He smirks. “Wise ass.”

I shrug, shoving my hands into my pockets.

“Meet me at the house Saturday night. Cora is going out with the girls from the diner.”

“I know saying no won’t be acceptable.”

“You’re right.”

“What time?” he asks.

“When the sun goes down.” He smirks, pats me on the arm, then leaves the room.

When the door is closed, I sit in the chair and get to work on the numbers for the next charity event. When the door opens again, I’m surprised to see Coyote walking in.

“I need you to plan for a community day.”

“A community day?” I ask. “What’s that?”

“You know… a day for the community to get together. ”

I glance at my laptop screen then back at him. “So another charity event?”

“No charity. This isn’t about funds. This is about…” He shoves his hands into his pockets, tilting his head back and forth. “Community.”

“I don’t understand.”

“You don’t have to understand. Just get it done.” He turns to head out, but stops short. “Oh, and it needs to be for the weekend after this one.”

“That’s less than two weeks,” I say. “How do you expect me to get all that done?”

“Figure it out,” he calls over his shoulder and leaves me alone, with the door wide open.

Fucking prick.