Page 1 of Ruin (Hell’s Mayhem MC: Maine Chapter #2)

Chapter One

Kolton

Twenty years old…

My room is pitch black as I enter. I close the door behind me and fall face-first onto my queen-sized bed that squeaks under my weight.

Fuck, it feels good to lay down. My father had me and my brother running laps again, saying we need to be in shape if we’re ever going to cut it in the club.

He should take the club and shove it up his ass.

Something soft trails along my leg, and I jump, thinking it’s a fucking bug. I’m not afraid of bugs, but I sure as fuck don’t want them in my bed. When I swat at it, rolling to my side, I’m met with a tall dark figure and my stomach sours.

Not again.

“It’s just me,” the person whispers, and I blow out a relieved breath, thankful it wasn’t him .

But then I get worried all over again. New fears assault my brain. Worries I’ve felt a hundred times before over this exact thing.

We’re going to get caught.

Then it’ll be worse. I’ll pay double for it, and my father will kill Lucian. Why would he be in my room so late at night, with the door closed? There’s only one reason, especially if he didn’t stop to speak to my father first—which I know he didn’t because he never does.

“What are you doing here?” I hiss.

Lucian kneels on the bed, his large body hovering over mine.

He’s so warm, and he smells so fucking good.

He always smells so good. Whatever expensive cologne he wears?

I love it. I’m addicted to it. I wish I could sneak into his room and steal a bottle of it, but that would ruin the fun.

It’s not just the smell I like, it’s him.

I like it more because it’s on him. . Because it means he’s near.

My favorite part is when it lingers on my pillow for days, and I smell him when I go to sleep.

“I had to see you.”

“You shouldn’t be here. If he finds you—”

“He won’t.”

Lucian trails his nose up my neck, stopping at my jaw before nipping at it. I groan, which causes him to chuckle, his breath warm across my skin.

“You’re sweaty,” he comments.

“He had us running laps.”

“Of course he did. ”

Lucian is my father’s best friend, and this is a terribly inappropriate relationship.

But so are all the others in my life, so what’s one more?

The only problem is if my father finds out, he’ll have the whole club after Lucian and it won’t matter how rich the fucker is.

Money won’t save him from the Hell’s Mayhem MC.

And it certainly won’t save me from my father’s wrath.

It doesn’t matter that I’m a legal adult; I’m part of the club, and I’m his son. He’s already told me if I try to leave, he’ll hunt me down and bring me back. I believe him, and I know it’ll be even worse if he finds out about us. So it’s not worth it.

Lucian’s lips press to my skin softly, and without thinking, I tip my head to the side, giving him more room. After a stressful day like today, this is exactly what I need. If only we didn’t have to sneak around.

“Did you miss me?” he asks in that husky voice of his that has me nearly melting.

“Yes.”

It’s not a lie, and I hate that it’s not. I wish I could not miss him. I wish a minute could go by when I wasn’t thinking about him. I wish this had never happened at all, because life would be easier without having to bury the pain of not being able to have him.

I never should have kissed him that first time. I should have kept my hands and my lips to myself.

“Come away with me next weekend.”

Fuck, I wish I could .

“Can’t. There’s a run.”

“Skip it.”

“You know I can’t.”

“You can, you just don’t want to.”

I huff an annoyed sound and roll away, shoving him off me. He has no idea how much of a dick my father is, and he has no idea what it’s like being in the club. I don’t understand how they’re friends at all—they’re so different. Not only as people, but their lives, too.

My father is a prick who treats his kids like shit and only cares about the club, which includes doing shitty things.

Lucian is a kind man who loves his son so much that he’s his first priority, even over his job as a surgeon.

Though, to be fair, my father only shows his true colors in private. No one knows how awful he is but me. So maybe it’s a me thing and not him. Maybe it’s just me who brings out the worst in him.

“You have no room to talk to me about things I want to do, Lucian. You’re the one who’s still married.”

Though it’s dark, I make out the disappointment on his face. It happens so often it’s burned into my memory.

“I told you—”

“Yeah, you told me. But I haven’t actually seen anything yet. It’s been six months.”

“Getting a divorce isn’t a quick task, Kolton. ”

“Which is why it should have been started the day after you told me you were going to do it. But, let me guess… something came up?”

I hold his gaze, knowing what’s coming. But even knowing doesn’t make it hurt any less. He sighs, running a hand through his thick, dark hair. He’s just over forty, but you’d never know it. There isn’t a single wrinkle or grey hair, even with the stressful life he has.

The moonlight shines in from the windows behind him, causing him to look like nothing more than a dark shadow. I guess it’s what he is most of the time. At least when it comes to me.

“You just don’t understand,” he says, getting to his feet.

Because you’re so young.

I don’t miss the words he doesn’t say. He’s said them enough for me to know it’s exactly what he means.

The only reason he doesn’t say them is because the last time he did, I threatened to stab him.

He’s aware of how I grew up, and is familiar enough with the club, so he knows I will fucking stab him.

Though, I’d most likely regret it after the blinding rage disappeared.

“Yeah, I guess I don’t.” I pull the door open and leave my own bedroom, needing to get away from him. He never listens to me, so there’s no point in asking him to go.

Twenty-three years old…

“Can you at least fucking smile?” my father grits out as he pulls the door of the way-too-fancy restaurant open. “We’re on vacation, Kolton, Christ.”

He only uses my real name when he’s mad at me.

When we’re at the club and he wants to play the part of a loving father, he calls me Snapper.

I earned that name on my first run, and I deserve for it to be used just like all the other guys in the club.

But he doesn’t give a fuck what I want because I’m not Kaison, the prized eldest son that no one can hold a candle to.

Also, this vacation sucks ass. I didn’t want to come in the first place. Who the fuck wants to vacation in New York City? Add being made to wear some scratchy suit that’s too tight around my balls, and I’m ready to murder someone. Of course, that too is only acceptable when he wants it.

“Yeah, I’ll try.”

Kaison elbows me. When I look at him, he gives me a look like what the fuck is wrong with you?

He doesn’t get it. He doesn’t understand any of this.

He thinks he knows everything, but he doesn’t have the faintest clue of what I fucking deal with from our father.

Kaison’s head is shoved too far up his ass to notice anything else going on around him.

Getting to the table is a blur. There are bright lights that flicker too much. Music and chatting that hurt my ears because it sounds exactly like nails on a chalkboard. The suit was already bothering me, but now the hem of my sock is twisting in my shoe. Yeah, I’m about to lose it.

The moment we’re in view of the large table, though, I feel him. It’s impossible not to. His eyes are like laser beams that burn holes right into my skin. I used to like it—love it, crave it. Now, I loathe it. Loathe him for what he did. For fucking ruining me.

Promises, promises. Everyone always has promises. No one ever wants to pull through. No one ever says what they mean.

“Jack,” Lucian says, getting to his feet with a bright smile. It enrages me. “I’m so glad you could make it.”

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world, Lucian. You know that.” My father grins back like some politician.

“And you brought the boys,” Lucian beams, as if he didn’t know we would be here too.

“Told you I would.” My father chuckles. “Boys, come say hi to your Uncle Lucian. Wish him a happy birthday.”

You’d think we were ten by the way he speaks to us.

It grates on my nerves. I’m not an imbecile, my IQ is probably double his.

Also, Lucian is not our uncle. No way, no how.

They’re friends from high school. That’s it.

No shared DNA, no shared family. That’s where I would have drawn the line, no matter how hot and irresistible he is.

Lucian got out of our Podunk town and made it big a long time ago; my father stayed back to be in the MC—dragging me and my brother down with him .

If only my mother were still alive, maybe things would be different.

“Happy birthday, Uncle Lucian,” Kaison says, giving him a hug. “You’re officially old.”

Lucian laughs, along with a few of the other people around the table. I recognize two of them—his wife and his son. The rest of the people are complete strangers to me, though I’m sure I’ve seen them through the years. We come to every birthday party he has. It’s fucking torture.

“Forty-five isn’t old, Kaison.”

“Come on, Kolton.” My father urges me with a shove that probably looks polite to anyone who notices it, but his knuckle digs into my spine, something that’ll surely leave a bruise.

I move over, hating that I’m being forced to do this.

Not only hug someone when I don’t want to be touched, but to hug him .

But I’d hate to know what the repercussions would be if I went against my father.

It’s not worth it. I’d much rather deal with the hurt and fight my anger all night than deal with what would happen otherwise.

Though the worst of his abuse stopped a few years ago, he’s still a piece of shit.

There’s a glint of sadness in Lucian’s eyes when I meet them. If he thinks I feel bad, I don’t. If he thinks I’ll forgive him, I won’t. Not after what he did.

Promises, promises.

“Happy birthday,” I say, forcing a smile.

He smiles in return, pulling me in for a hug. His scent envelopes me and my body reacts without me wanting it too. That’s the problem with Lucian. When I’m around him, I lose myself. I don’t know who I am, and I can’t control a fucking thing. I’m a puppet and he’s my puppeteer. It’s gross.

“You look so fucking hot in this suit, Kolton,” he whispers, his breath warm on my skin..

I pull away from him, scowling, hating the way my skin lights up at his approval.

I did always enjoy his approval, and that’s the worst part about this whole thing. He gives me exactly what I need, and I need it so fucking bad that I allow all the bad shit, too. I let him hurt me because the good stuff is great. He makes me weak, and it’s pathetic.

We take our seats and I zone out for the rest of the meal. Because I refuse to fall into his trap again. I can’t let him take another piece of my heart.

Twenty-six years old…

“I did it, Kolton. I finally did it.”

It’s hard to believe what he’s saying, but he’s shoving papers toward me and grinning a mile wide, so he must be telling the truth. I take them to look them over .

They are actual divorce papers.

“You did it?” I ask, my heart doing a flip in my chest. Though it’s right in front of my face, it’s still hard to believe.

When he called and told me to meet him at our place, an abandoned park off the main road, because he had good news, I rolled my eyes.

But I still came.

He’s been telling me this for years, and for years I’ve allowed him to pull me along on a string. Because I’m pathetic and desperate for his attention.

Yet, here I am.

“I did. I dropped them off first thing this morning,” he says, his hands going to my waist.

My eyes flick from the papers to him, and I see the joy in his eyes. The happiness, the excitement, the… freedom.

Freedom that I will now have, too.

“So, we can—” I can’t even finish the words. This is surreal and speaking them is hard. It makes them real. I still can’t believe that this is happening.

After all these years…

“Yes, Kolton. We can leave. Make a life together, finally . It’s done.”

Emotion swells in my chest and my eyes burn with tears.

Lucian steps closer, gently cupping my face. “I’m sorry it took so long, but I told you I would do it. I told you.”

“You did it,” I whisper. My eyes fall closed as a thousand pounds release from my shoulders .

He finally did it.

“When can we leave?” I ask, opening my eyes and looking into his bright grey ones.

“Pack your things. I’ll pick you up tomorrow night, eleven pm. We’ll drive to New York and fly out first thing the next morning. I already bought our tickets.”

Just the thought has me over the moon. I throw my arms around his neck, pressing my lips to his. Lucian chuckles, his arms coming around me as he kisses me back.

Finally, we can be together. Finally, I can get away from this place.

We can be together without having to hide it, without having to sneak around, without having to pretend, and without having to worry about his wife finding out. It won’t matter anymore, because he won’t have a wife.

We kiss for a long time as I try to show him how thrilled I am, since words fail me more than not. When we finally pull apart, we’re breathless. My heart is pounding, and I’m eager for so much more.

“I have to do a few things, but I’ll see you tomorrow night, okay?”

I smile, not wanting to let him go, but knowing if we’re going to do this, I have to. Just for a little while longer.

He gives me one more lingering kiss, and then he leaves.

His expensive car starts up, then disappears down the road.

It takes me a few minutes to clear my head, and it’s only when I walk toward my bike that I realize I’m still holding the papers.

I look down at them, still in shock. Fuck, he really did it.

These papers are him requesting a divorce from his wife.

This is real.

“This is fucking real,” I say to myself. I shove them into my pocket and hop on my bike to head back to the clubhouse. I’m riding on cloud nine for the rest of the day, and when I get home, I pack everything I’ll need, shoving the bag under my bed so it isn’t found by my father or brother.

Tomorrow can’t come fast enough, but somehow I manage to get to sleep. The day goes by in a blur, my anxiety and excitement at an all-time high. Night hits. I wait and wait. Eleven comes and goes. Lucian doesn’t show up.

In fact, I never see him again.