Page 27

Lucas

The second Xander and I step into the house, we’re hit with the haunting sound of Haven’s sobs.

“What did that motherfucker do?” Xander growls, throwing his backpack to the floor in the mudroom by the garage.

I do the same, following right on his heels as he tears through the house. We find them in the living room. Haven’s sobs echo off the high ceilings, making my hair stand on end.

Colton is sitting on the couch with Haven settled in his lap. She’s wrapped up in a blanket, shaking. This close to Colton, she looks so fucking small.

So fragile.

It sets off a chain reaction inside me. First comes the desires to crush her with my bare hands—to show her how weak she is compared to us and remind her how naively stupid it was to ask us for help. But the protectiveness I can’t seem to shake eclipses it in a split second, so powerful it brings me to an abrupt stop.

I want to protect her.

To comfort her the way Colton is.

To be who she runs to when she needs anything—pain, pleasure, or comfort.

“Just let it all out,” Colton murmurs. He’s holding her to his body with one arm and stroking her back with his other hand. “One day, you’ll understand.”

That only makes her cry into his chest harder. Yesterday, she looked like she wanted to kill Colton, but now she’s practically clinging to him.

That’s Colt, though. He’s a master at mind games, and Haven seems more susceptible to them than most. Especially now, since she has no one else to turn to. If she needs to cry in someone’s arms, it’s going to be in ours.

“What did you do?” Xander demands.

At first glance, he’s no match for Colton—still tall, but thinner. Xander hasn’t put anywhere close to the same effort that Colton has into building his physique, but right now, he looks ready to tear into him with the force of a hurricane.

He’d win, too. My boy fights dirty. He’s fucking relentless. And if he didn’t? He has me backing him up, and he knows it.

“I got her to open up,” Colton says coolly, not even glancing at us.

“Without us?” I grit out.

“I’ll update you both later.”

“Colton,” Xander snaps. “We agreed to do that together.”

He shrugs. “Didn’t feel like waiting.”

Xander’s fingers curl into fists. “You bas—”

“You’re the ones who wanted to go slow.” Colton raises a lazy, challenging brow, finally glancing our way. “I never said I was on board with that.”

Motherfucker.

Hurting Haven has always been a guilty pleasure of mine. Watching her break, knowing her tears are because of me—I eat it up every time, especially because she fights back. I love her determination to carry on, no matter what we do to trip her up.

But this feels different. She sounds downright distraught.

“Haven?” I kneel in front of them and place a hand on her thigh. “What did he do to you?”

I don’t think she’s in a state to speak. When she meets my gaze, there’s no fire in her eyes. Just… emptiness.

“Colton?” Xander prompts.

“I reminded her that she can’t get out of our original agreement.”

“Specifics,” I snap.

“I restrained her and flogged her until she told me what I wanted to know, and then I fucked her throat and forced her to come so she can get it through her head that we can do whatever we want to her.”

The cold, detached way Colton says it horrifies me just as much as what he just admitted to doing.

“You did what?” Xander asks as a million thoughts run through my head at once.

My entire life, I’ve always played the role of the protector. It’s embedded into my soul, and no matter how hard I try to fight it, that extends to Haven. Right now, I don’t think I should fight it.

I’m moving before I realize it, tearing Colton’s arms off Haven and lifting her into my arms. She cries out in terror, and I can see it on her expression that she doesn’t know whether she should try to run, stay with Colton, or cling to me.

“What the hell are you doing?” Colton asks, obviously irritated.

“You don’t deserve to touch her.” I step back so Haven is out of his reach. “Not after what you just did. What the fuck, Colt?”

Haven’s sobs quiet into gasping breaths as she stares up at me in shock. Hell, I’m surprised too, but I can’t focus on my own actions right now. I just need to get her away from Colt.

“I’m taking her upstairs,” I say to Xander as I move toward the stairs. “Don’t let him follow.”

Colton doesn’t try to stop me, although I can feel his searing glare burning into my back. Xander says something to him that I don’t catch, but I can hear the fury in his voice. He’s as pissed as I am.

In mine and Xander’s room, I set Haven on the bed. As I’m pulling the covers over her, she grabs my arm and tugs me down. I shake my head, but her eyes turn pleading, and between that and her tears, I find myself climbing in with her.

“You’re gonna be okay,” I tell her.

“I don’t think that’s true,” she whispers.

With a sigh, I wrap her up in my arms, and she curls into me like she thinks I’m safe for her. Right now, I want to be.

“Give it some time.”

“I wanted to kill him. I… I tried to kill him, but I couldn’t, and he called me a coward.”

Oh, for fuck’s sake.

“That was pretty stupid of him.”

She sniffles and looks up at me with those sad, wide brown eyes that make me want to end everyone who’s ever harmed her. “Do you think I’m a coward for running away?”

“From the cult?”

She nods.

“Jesus, Haven. No. God—fuck, no. And Colton doesn’t either. I don’t know why he said that.”

“He said I needed him. That I needed him to force me to face my fears around sex because I can’t do it on my own.” More tears are streaming down her face, and she’s losing control of her voice.

I don’t want her to start crying again, but if she needs to, then dammit, I have to let her. I know what it’s like to be forced to hide your hurt and your pain. I can’t put that on her.

“What if he’s right?” Haven asks in between sobs. “What if I do need this? Oh god, Luc, I don’t want him to be right.”

“He’s not,” I assure her gently.

“But it worked,” she cries.

“I don’t know about that, Haven.”

“But I came. And it felt good. And—” Another heartbreaking sob. “There was a part of me that wanted it.”

I don’t really know what to say to that. It’s the last thing I expected to hear from Haven’s lips. She’s allowed to get off on whatever works for her, and I’ll never judge her for it, but she despises us. Hates us.

“I was so scared,” she whispers. “I was afraid he’d never stop.”

“I’m sorry, Haven.”

“What if he does it again?” she asks, turning panicked. “What if he decides to keep me locked up forever and only lets me out of my cage to hurt me?”

“Xander and I wouldn’t let that happen,” I say, but I don’t think it registers in her brain.

“I’m never going to be safe,” she mutters. Her eyes are unfocused, and it doesn’t feel like she’s talking to me.

“That’s not true.”

Her eyes snap to mine, and she shakes her head. “Yes, it is. It’s all the same. I said I can’t go back, but back is here. Back is everywhere.” She’s pushing at my chest, and she only stops when I give her space. “It’ll always be the same. Always trapped. Always scared.”

“No.” It takes everything in me not to reach for her.

“Please don’t let him hurt me again,” she says quietly. “Please, Lucas.”

It’s not something I can promise. I’ll fucking kill him if Colton ever tries to torture information out of Haven again, but I can’t control him.

“Lucas.” She reaches for me, and her fingers curl into my shirt. “P-please.”

“If he hurts you like that again, he’s dead.”

That doesn’t seem to ease her worries. She’s panting again, and her eyes are darting around the room like she’s trying to find something she can use to defend herself with. When the bedroom door opens, she lets out a terrified cry and jumps out of bed.

Xander freezes in the doorway. He has a glass of water in one hand and a pill in the other. “Haven, it’s just me. I’m not gonna hurt you.”

“Can’t stay.” She’s backed herself into the far corner, her eyes wide.

“Haven,” I say gently. “We’re gonna keep you safe, okay?”

She shakes her head.

“Hey.” Cautiously, Xander approaches Haven, keeping his movements slow and careful to not spook her. “Luc and I just want to help you feel better. Do you want that?”

“N-no.”

“You don’t want to feel calm? Feel safe?”

More tears flood her eyes, and her bottom lip trembles.

Xander is almost to her by this point. He’s keeping his voice so soft and gentle. “I hate seeing you like this, doll. Let me help you. Just take this.” He holds out the pill.

“What is it?”

“Just something to help you calm down. I promise it won’t hurt you.”

“What about Colton?”

“He’s downstairs. We’re not gonna let him touch you.”

Haven eyes the pill. I can see how much she’s tempted, but her fear is holding her back. She knows she can’t trust us, and she’s right.

“What Colton did was wrong,” Xander says. “Luc and I weren’t on board with it. We didn’t know he was going to do it, and we won’t let it happen again.”

That’s an empty promise, and Xander knows it. If Haven was in a better state, she’d know that too, but instead she nods and takes the pill. She swallows it down with a gulp of water before shakily handing the glass back to Xan.

“Good,” he says soothingly. “That was good. Now go back to bed.”

She hesitates, but when Xander gently wraps his arm around her shoulders and guides her to our bed, she lets him.

I lift up the blankets for her, and she crawls in until she’s right up against me. Xander gets into bed as well.

“You won’t trap me?” she asks.

Xander and I exchange a silent glance before he says, “No.”

I’m not sure if it’s the truth.

“And you—you promise you won’t let Colton in?”

“Promise, little fawn.” I brush my lips across her forehead. “Now let yourself relax.”