Page 44 of Puck My Life

Mal’s jaw juts. “Remove your top.” He snaps the words, furious, and I don’t blame him.

My fingers tremble. I’ve been careful not to let them see me naked. Our foster mother was militant about making sure we never thought of each other that way. Never be naked in front of those boys! Remember, you’re family. She said that…right up until she didn’t.

I pull my top up and off, and though I want to lift my arms to cover the teal and black lace bra that shows my nipples through it, I don’t. I, instead, stiffly fold it up and turn back to them.

There’s something hungry on their faces but shocked, too, like they weren’t expecting me. I’m not sure what they thought, maybe that I was an alien? I’d be annoyed if I weren’t frozen under their stares.

“Truth or dare,” I manage to stutter out.

“Dare,” Raynor says confidently.

I wish I had that confidence. I struggle to pull my brain away from the crushing despair that’s picking me apart. It’s like the more clothes I remove, the more of my illusions fall. How much more honesty can I give them? I only have a few secrets of my own.

“Dance with me, just this once.” The words slip out without any real thought. I love our dances, it’s always been a thing, but the couple of times have been few and far between. Soon it will be too late. I won’t get this chance again.

Mal pulls out his phone and puts on a slow song. I recognise one of Raynor’s ballads. It’s about a girl he’s always loved. In the darkest parts of the night, I’d listen to that song alone in my bed and wish he were talking about me.

He takes my hand and pulls me outside. The stars twinkle in their faded way. Everything is a last. I don’t want to see the sky like this for the last time. Deacon sits on the porch railing and swings one leg, while Mal sits on our swing chair. Raynor pulls me into his arms and starts to move.

At first, I’m conscious of where I’m putting my feet and how my hands are on his shoulders, but then I catch the slow rhythm and start moving with him.

His fingers glide up and down my spine. I lean into him, closing my eyes as his other hand rubs small circles on the spot just above my ass.

I’m so relaxed in his arms that I don’t recognise my scent growing, not until we’ve stopped moving. The song has ended, and when I open my eyes and lift my head, I remember where I am. His confusion is written on his face.

Our eyes lock, tension rising. He opens his mouth when the doorbell rings.

“Hey, Deaky!”

The call comes from the front of the house.

I cringe and then rip out of Raynor’s arms, covering myself. “My clothes!”

“What’s she doing here?” Raynor hisses. “You said it was over.”

Deacon lifts his hand and shakes his head. “We did. It is!”

Raynor gets a gleam in his eyes that promises pain. He takes a step, but I sidestep into his path and reach up, touching his neck.

“I need my clothes,” I stress the words, imagining what would happen if the influencer caught me out here with Deacon Katz, her hockey flame. I’d be crucified.

Mal comes rushing out of the house, throwing my top at me. It lands on the wet grass. I pick it up and pull it on two seconds before she steps out onto the porch.

She has a key? When did they give her a key?

Indy looks perfect. Her dress is stunning, exposing long, bronzed limbs; there isn’t a hair out of place. Her lips are shiny, and her eyelashes are long and dark. I feel like a grubby child in my wet t-shirt and the burn of shame weighing me down.

I step back from Raynor and plead with him not to make a scene.

“Oh, you’re here.”

I force a smile and shrug. “I’m on the way out.”

Deacon growls, but we all ignore him. The tension between Raynor and Deacon is getting savage, and I’m torn between just leaving and sorting it out for them.

“You have to finish the game!” Mal says, surprising me.

He grips the rail, leaning down, his gaze intent on me.