Page 23 of Puck My Life

“Never! I am the pirate king.”

I shake my head, amused at her sudden obsession.

“You’re a girl, you can’t be a king or a pirate,” Deacon growls.

She narrows her eyes at Deacon. I snicker, already knowing the answer.

“I can be the king and queen; I can be anything I want to be.”

“Of course, you can!” Mal shouts.

Deacon narrows his eyes. “Get down now. Pirates are bad.”

I stand up and climb up the pirate ship until I can grip her legs. She lets out a scream and spreads her arms, trusting me to catch her.

“Look, I can fly.”

PRESENT

“Not going to happen, not ever. Never!” I snap at Vae and lean over the kitchen table, bracing my fists on either side of me so I can give her my best glare.

She inhales, drawing herself up and narrowing her eyes. “You can’t stay mad at me forever, Raynor.”

“Try me. It’s not me that’s jumping and bailing out of this family.”

I swear, I see steam coming from her ears, but when she speaks, her tone is even and very carefully controlled.

“I’m not doing this with you. You have a gig. Have fun, good luck. I love you.”

I glare at her. “If you loved me, you wouldn’t be abandoning me when I need you most.”

She slams her mug down on the kitchen table. “I am not abandoning you; I’m going to help you transition to independent living.”

“We are independent.”

She turns away from me. “What appointment do you have at three today? How do you make a risotto? What cycle do you wash your clothes on? When was the last time you woke up to an alarm instead of a damn coffee and piece of toast with half jam and half peanut butter because you don’t like the two to mix but don’t want two pieces?”

I grind my teeth.

“I’m going to show you how to do things so that they don’t disrupt your life too much. Just, can you trust me, please?”

I hang my head. I hate arguing with Vae, but this is too much. “You’re leaving. Just like that? How can you even contemplate just leaving? I can’t imagine even a day without you.”

She clenches the sink so tight her knuckles turn white. “Because I don’t have a choice,” she whispers. She turns and brushes past me, going to Mal’s door and pushing it open.

“Mal, you have to get up; you’re going to be late.”

“Get out, Vae!”

“You have practice.”

“Get OUT!”

She retreats and stands there looking at the door like she wants to cry. This whole situation is confusing me. Vae wants to leave, but she doesn’t. She’s angry and hurting, but she is resolute.

I want to go into Mal’s room and kick his ass for putting that look on her face. But I think I’m more angry with myself than with her.

I lean against the doorframe and try to look at this all objectively. Vae does so much for us, but she’s never implied she was unhappy. I thought she liked taking care of us. The only time I’ve really seen her upset is when some of the many passing girlfriends got a little bit too comfortable. But we always moved them on.