Page 9 of Next to Everything We Wanted

I swallowed, staring at my sneakers. I didn’t want to admit it to myself, but that’d been the whole reason I’d impulsively decided to pack my bags at six in the morning. I’d left a note for Phoenix and Forrest, who lived with me in our four-bedroom apartment, that I’d be gone for a few days. Though I’d been able to keep myself together at last night’s performance, I needed an escape.

I’d completely forgotten that my parents would probably bring up the elephant in the room.

“It’s no big deal,” I told Mom, not sure of which thing I was talking about. “I was just in the mood to stay for a few days.”

She nodded, but her gaze held the same sadness. “Let me know if you need anything.”

“I’m fine. Really.” And I was fine. Well, I would be after I got through the initial stages of awkwardness.

The look Mom exchanged with Dad told me they weren’t convinced.

“You were together for a year,” Dad reminded me. “It was your first serious relationship.”

I closed my eyes, trying to control my breathing.Don’t snap. Just breathe. “We’ve been handling it well.”

Asher didn’t seem to pick up on the shift in the atmosphere, because he danced around the living room with his band shirts. “I can’t wait to wear these. I might wear one after we go to the beach.”

“You’re going to the beach?” I asked, glad for a change of subject. “When?”

“In half an hour,” Dad said. “You still have your swimsuits in the laundry room, right?”

“Yeah, Asher’s been trying them on,” Mom said.

“What?” I blinked at Asher. “You’ve been trying on my swimsuits?”

Asher gave me a cheeky grin. “You have great options.”

I shook my head. “I guess it’s a younger sibling thing.” Sometimes I wished I had an older sibling to look up to. When I was little, I’d pretend that my action figures were my big brothers, guiding me through the mess of the world. The only people I’d really looked up to were my dad and my favorite singers.

And looking up to a poster was never a good idea.

“I’m going to unpack in my room and get ready,” I said, bringing my bags down the hallway. My room was at the very end, on the left. When I opened the door, a hot mess greetedme. Clothes were all over my bed, and I knew I hadn’t left them there.

I grunted. “Asher, what the hell did you do to my room?”

Asher ran down the hallway to join the chaos. “I was trying on your old clothes!” He nodded over to my closet. “Like I said, you have a lot of great options.”

“You couldn’t be bothered to clean it up?”

“You never cleaned your room when you lived here.” His voice wobbled.

I frowned. Back when I’d lived here, my room had looked messier than this with clothes, books that didn’t have room on my shelves, and band merch that had yet to be organized everywhere.

“You can’t live in a room that looks like a music store exploded all over it!” Mom had scolded. “Gosh, and to think I have to go through this again with another teenage boy.”

It looked like Asher had gotten a head start.

“I’m sorry,” Asher said, giving me puppy eyes as Dapper came in to examine the pile of clothes. “I just miss you.”

Something tugged in my chest as I hugged him. “I’m here now.” I ruffled his hair. “Let’s get ready for the beach, okay?”

He nodded, his sadness fading before he ran out of my room.

I looked over at Dapper, who was making himself at home on the pile of clothes. The tugging feeling in my chest returned, reminding me of how much I’d missed this place. I’d spent years in this very room, telling Dapper about everything that went on in my life like he was a real person. “Everything is fine, right?” I asked him as I rubbed behind his ears. “I feel fine.”

He looked up at me with his big brown eyes. Don’t lie to yourself.

“I thought you trained Dapper how to fetch.”