Page 37 of Next to Everything We Wanted

“Dang it.” Gavin grabbed a card and placed it down.

I beamed, my card being the same color as it. Green. I placed my card down and threw my hands in the air. “Yes!” I pumped my fists and danced in my seat. “And Sienna Rowan takes home the UNO champs again!”

“What?” Gavin’s eyes went big before he shrugged and smiled at me. “Good game. Now I have to start my winning streak all over again by dueling Nick twenty-three times.”

“Dang, massive dig right there.”

“It’s true!” He laughed. “He always bombs it. I don’t think he’s ever won in his life.”

I smiled, putting my elbows on the table. “How are you feeling now?”

“Like I can actually breathe again.” He sighed. “Thank you for staying here. I’m sorry for snapping at you. It’s just . . . I can’t really explain it. When my anxiety hits, I can’t think straight.”

“I understand. Sometimes fears build up and take over our thoughts at the wrong time. It makes you feel so helpless in the moment.”

He nodded, the stormy waters in his eyes calming. “It’s the worst.”

I brushed my hand along his cold knuckles. “You can bring some of your defenses down when I’m here. I don’t want you to feel like you aren’t safe with me.” My cheeks warmed. “You know, if we ever bump into each other by chance again.”Gosh, you’re ruining it!

He gave a low chuckle, curling his fingers in mine. “Thank you.” His sigh was heavier this time, one deep from his chest. “I?—”

“What the hell, Ivan?”

Both of us jumped from our seats, the deck of cards falling all over the table. I tried to place them back, but my hands were shaking too much.

Everett crossed his arms, narrowing his eyes at us. “We told you to come back when you were calm enough, and you’re sitting here playing UNO with some chick?” His stormy gaze went to mine. “How didyoueven get back here?”

I swallowed. He wouldn’t beat up a teenage girl for playing UNO with his bandmate, right?

“Relax, Everett,” Gavin snapped, balling his trembling fists against his sides. “She was just?—”

“Relax?” Everett huffed. “You’re goofing off with some chick”—if he called me that one more time—“while we’re working our asses off out there, and you’re telling me torelax?” He threw his hands up. “You’re the reason we’re playing on a Monday night, and you don’t even show up.”

“Ididshow up.” Gavin’s chest started heaving again. “Did you expect me to have a panic attack in front of over a hundred people?”

Everett’s face softened. He looked at me again, but the fire in his eyes remained. “Can you give us a moment?”And not come back?

“Of course,” I said, my pulse racing so fast that I couldn’t think straight. “Bye, Ivan.”

Gavin waved, barely smiling. “Have a good evening.”

Within thirty seconds, I managed to scurry back to my seat. My friends and cousins looked at me with wide eyes. Raina glared at me again, but I didn’t have time for her drama. She could find out what happened another day.

“Where were you?” Emma asked as she made way for me to sit back down. “You completely disappeared!”

“Yeah.” I swallowed. “I had to take care of a few things.”

“Lady issues?” Adam asked.

“Sure,” I said flatly.

A few minutes later, Somewhere in the Sky came on stage again with Gavin. Something else had joined them—tension. Ivan spoke into the mic before performing the next song, but he wasn’t into it at all. He messed up a few lyrics and a few chords on the guitar, causing fans to stare in confusion. Some even started leaving.

Although I tried to enjoy the rest of the performance, it was next to impossible with the pit in my stomach, knowing that a new problem was brewing between them.

After a half hour of agony, I collected my things. “We’re going home,” I told everyone. “I’m not feeling well.”

No one questioned it. Even Adam and Emma didn’t protest, getting out of the booth without saying goodbye. I turned to Raina and gave her a quick hug, and she hugged me back. I offered her a smile, hoping that she could forgive me for snapping at her.