Page 68 of Mr. Green

Chapter 43

Lana

It’s been two days since I left Texas and Grant has kept in constant contact, which is a relief. The need to hear from him settles me down. The moment I’m thinking of him, I look down to see a silly text or him checking in.

Tonight, for instance, I’m eating dinner at home. Paige is with me hanging out. Then my phone buzzes.

Grant: *crazy face emoji*

Grant: I miss you. Two more days until...

Grant: Image of a bear squeezing a dog in a hug.

I start laughing. He’s so cute.

Lana: I’m not sure my lungs could handle a squeeze like that.

Grant: They’ll love it, baby girl. *wink emoji*

Lana: Excited to see you too. *kiss emoji*

“Look at that goofy smile you have!” Paige teases, staring at me from the other side of the couch.

I look down at my reflection on my phone after the backlight goes out. She’s right—a funny look is pasted on my face. My hair is down instead of up. I’ve got a tiny blush to my cheeks. I feel good. Not just because there’s someone in my life who is exciting, but I’ve been working on myself.

My gratitude list is two pages long now. My old clothes are starting to fit. The last thing telling me I’m more myself is I’m searching for more color in my life. It makes me think I’ll need some new outfits.

“I’m pretty happy,” I confess.

“You look over the moon happy. You’ve been sad for so long, it’s nice to see you’re back.”

“How long have I been sad?” My head snaps up at her with a furrowed brow.

“It started slow, which made it hard to see for all of us. It was little things where you’d put yourself down. You’d say you were stupid or fat. When we denied those claims, you’d stare off like you didn’t hear us. It was weird.”

“Did it start when I got together with Ryan?”

“You changed a bit when you got with him. Scarlett and I didn’t want you to break apart from us, so we didn’t blame him. Some days I wonder if we would’ve said something if it would’ve helped you see he was a dick. We chose not to because we were scared of losing you. We would choose you all the time, no matter what. If you liked this guy, then you had your reasons.”

“I know I can always go to you guys.” My hands fidget with some pillow fringe.

“In a relationship, you want to pick that person. We get that, but we wanted you to have a guy whodeservedyou. Ryan was far from that.”

“I think you guys supported me the best way you could without getting in the middle of our relationship. Looking back, I’m glad he left.” I shrug. “I just want to know why. How could you just up and leave someone you were with for years?”

“I think he knew you were too good for him. He tried to keep you down so you’d stay with him. When he realized he couldn’t block out your light, he left when he had a chance. I’m glad he did. I’m glad you’ve found yourself again. I’ve missed the friend I’ve always known.”

I give a small smile. “Me too. I think Grant showed me what I deserved, but I found the way to get back to me.”

She smiles through tears, which makes me teary-eyed. We hug each other, glad to have the other around.

“I’m sick of crying.” I half laugh, half cry.

“You’re right. You’re right. What do you want to do?”

“Help me pick some new clothes?” I say in a hopeful voice. “Nothing too revealing, Paige!”

“Yes! I got you!” Paige takes my phone and begins scrolling through some options she thinks would look good.