Page 48 of Mr. Green
“The hell it’s not. You’re my sister and he was my friend who knows to stay away from dating anyone in my family!”
Grant, surprisingly, doesn’t back down. “I’m not staying away from Lana. She’s special and amazing. Unlessshetells me to fuck off, I’m still going to take her on dates.”
“You better shut the fuck up before I hunt you down and pummel you into next Tuesday.” Josh points at him, like that’ll do a whole lot. “You knew to stay away from mysister.”
“First off, I’ve never seen you throw a punch. All you do is talk shit. Second, she’s an adult. We’re adults. Third, I’m not an asshole. We were friends; you know that.”
Josh is as red as a cherry, staring at Grant, and breathing hard with his nostrils flaring. I fear he’s going to take his anger out on my phone. Thankfully he just shouts a, “Fuck you!” at Grant. Then hangs up with force, tossing my phone on the bed.
“How long have you been seeing that fucktard?” He points down at the phone.
“None of your business,” I tell him, crossing my arms. “You need to relax. Find something blue to focus on.”
He scratches his head. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“Blue is a calming color. It might help.”
“I’m not looking for something blue. I’m looking at you while you tell me what you’re doing with Grant.”
“I didn’t think you’d want that much information.”
“Please tell me I did not just hear that you are screwing Grant fucking Green.” He puts his hands over his ears, which is confusing. He keeps asking questions about him. I stare at him with squinting eyes. I don’t know who the hell this guy thinks he is, defining who I can date, but it’s not going to fly.
“You don’t have a say in who I’m seeing. I haven’t seen anyone in a long fucking time. You’re not ruining this for me!” I point at his chest as hard as I can. “I’ll make my own decisions because, here’s the important part, I’m a fucking grown-up!”
“Lana, he was my friend. I know about all the dirty things he’s probably been thinking. Not only that—he’s way too old for you!”
“You were just partying with a twenty-year-old last weekend! Five years is not too old for me. Besides, I thought Grant was one of your nicer friends in high school? He always had a girlfriend, he volunteered all the time, and he played golf for fuck’s sake. It’s not like he’s a football player. He was different.”
“Yeah, but still. You’re mybabysister and it’s weird my friend is dating you.”
“Isn’t it better to date someone you know instead of a stranger?”
My mom is not used to anyone cussing in her home. I’m sure she heard the commotion and wants to wash our mouths out with soap.
“What is going on in here?” she yells, barging in. “Youknow there’s no cursing in this house.”
“Talk to Josh about it.” I swish my hand in his direction.
“I’m talking to both of you about it. Joshua, maybe it’s time you leave. If you can’t get along with your sister for two minutes, you need to go.”
The best thing about being the youngest is I never get the blame for anything. I used to try to fight it all the time, but Josh actually deserves it tonight. He can’t tell me how to live my life.
“Mom, if you only knew.” He shakes his head.
If he tells my mom what’s going on right now, she’s going to lose her shit. My parents may be all about family, but they’re not okay with casual sex. Since Grant and I aren’t an official thing, she’s going to be mad if she finds out. My dad will try to kill Grant. Don’t ask me why, old values or some shit.
I stare at my brother, challenging him. If he breaks sibling code and tells the parents, he’ll be dead to all of us.
He does the right thing and stomps down the stairs. The front door slams and then my mom turns to me. “What was that about?”
“Josh just had his panties in a twist about me talking to one of his old friends. He’ll get over it.”
“Talking? Does that mean you found a husband? You said you weren’t dating anyone!”
“That’s because we aren’t dating. We’re talking.” I hold up my phone and shake it a little. “If anything happens, I’ll bring him to meet you guys.”
“That’s my girl,” she says, and then kisses me with her lipstick laden lips on the forehead. “Your kids are going to be so cute!” She goes to walk out of my room and then turns back to me. “After you’re married of course.”