Page 33

Walking into school with crutches meant a lot of people asking what had happened. And I didn’t mind the questions. I just didn’t want the attention.

Niall and Megan had class at the other side of the school, so I was by myself, and of course the first person I saw was Hunter, on his phone in the doorway. When he saw me, he put his phone away and gave me a grin.

‘Lex!’ He came towards me and wrapped me in a hug before I could get away. ‘How are you? I wanted to visit, but Niall was being weird about it, so that’s why I didn’t, in case you thought I didn’t care. I was going to bring you flowers and everything.’

I hadn’t actually thought about it at all. I hadn’t been expecting him to visit, and if I had thought about him, it was only brief thoughts of panic that I’d have to see him again after that kiss.

‘I’m fine,’ I said, wriggling out of his hug. ‘Where’s Zoe?’

‘Dunno. We’re not together any more. That was short.’ He laughed and I screwed up my face.

‘Yeah, because you messed things up.’

‘The heart wants what the heart wants,’ he teased, and I kept my face the way it was.

‘Pretty sure that night was nothing to do with your heart. You really hurt her, you know.’

‘She’ll get over it,’ he scoffed.

‘Yeah? So will you. Fuck off, Hunter,’ I said the words simply, but inside I was burning with rage at how he’d treated Zoe, and how he’d treated me.

I couldn’t believe I hadn’t seen it before, but I guess he’d been part of our lives for so long that it was easy to excuse the way he acted as ‘Hunter being Hunter’.

I limped away and ignored him calling after me.

I walked into the corridor and there was Zoe, leaning against a locker and talking to Amina. When I walked over, they stopped talking.

I smiled. ‘Hey.’

I watched as Amina looked at Zoe like she was waiting for her reaction.

‘Hey, Lexie.’ Zoe smiled back warmly, and Amina looked confused.

‘You have English now, don’t you? Want to walk together?’ I asked hopefully.

‘Sure.’

‘Ugh, I have chemistry. Chat later, bitches,’ said Amina, and she walked the other way with a wave.

For once I was happy to see Zoe’s trademark smile.

‘I think you smile more than anyone I’ve ever met,’ I commented.

Zoe laughed and touched my shoulder. ‘I guess it’s from when I was a kid.

My mum always said, “You catch more flies with honey,” so she told me to smile all the time and people would like me.

’ She shrugged, her voice slowing at the end like she was embarrassed.

‘I guess it just became such a habit I don’t even know I’m doing it any more … ’

‘You have a great smile.’

She grinned. ‘Thanks. My mum’s always been kind of OTT about me making friends.

Obsessed with me being popular, being good at everything, blah, blah, blah.

So weird. I mean, did you see her that night ages ago after practice?

Total cringe.’ She pulled a face. ‘I was so embarrassed.’ I could see some pain in her eyes, and it hit me how hard that must be and how grateful I was for my own mum, who was the total opposite.

‘To be fair, you’re always talking to people, so I guess her wish came true. I probably should have tried to be more like that. Stupid only having one really good friend.’

‘Oh my God, no! I would kill to have a best, best friend. I mean, Amina’s cool but she’s more into TikTok than talking to me most of the time, and I think everyone else just talks to me because I’m rich and pretty,’ she said seriously.

I burst out laughing. ‘Zoe!’

‘What? It’s true. I’m not even saying I have everything. Hunter couldn’t even stand me for a month. And he didn’t even ask me to V-Ball until the day before.’

We were almost at class, and I slowed down more than I had to.

‘Hunter’s an asshole. It’s nothing to do with you. And, hey, he made us friends, so not all bad.’

Zoe stared at me. ‘Really? Like proper friends? Like, do you want to come over to my house sometime and come out on our boat?’ Zoe’s smile was off the charts.

‘That sounds great.’

Niall met me after my last class and took my bag for me. ‘How’s it going?’

‘Fine,’ I said.

But it wasn’t fine. The whole day I’d been thinking about Shane, replaying the moment I looked up at the party and saw him staring at me in horror.

I reminded myself that we’d broken up because he was keeping secrets, but it didn’t make me feel any better.

I let myself think about our training sessions, how much we laughed, covered in sweat, and how much I’d wanted him.

Niall shared a look with Megan.

Megan walked slowly beside me. ‘Hey, the NI Senior Women’s match is coming up. Let’s all go together?’

‘Sure,’ I said sadly.

‘You’re totally not fine,’ Megan said to me in the car. We were sitting in the back. ‘Shane?’

I nodded. ‘Yeah.’

‘Did you talk to him?’

I shook my head and held back tears. Megan took my hand and held it the whole way back to her house.

When we got home Niall turned to me in the back seat.

‘Want to go down to the beach?’

I hadn’t been down to the beach with Niall in years.

Niall put our bags in the house, and we walked to the shore, where I abandoned my crutches and held on to Niall to steady me. Then I sat down and stared out at the waves while Niall chucked stones into the water.

‘You know me and Meg are always here if you want to talk.’ He kept chucking the stones and my heart swelled for him.

‘I just wish I hadn’t messed everything up.’

‘But did you?’

‘I broke up with him because there was something he wasn’t telling me. And then he showed up and saw me kissing Hunter, even though I didn’t kiss him. He kissed me .’

‘Hunter’s a fucking idiot,’ said Niall. ‘But, like, I don’t have any secrets from Megan. It shouldn’t be like that. You did the right thing.’

And because it came from Niall it felt like maybe I had done the right thing, even though my heart still ached.

‘What’s that annoying thing Mum always says?’ Niall turned to me, and I looked at him quizzically. ‘What’s for you won’t pass you. That’s it. Yep, it works here.’

He turned back to the lough, and I thought about it.

He was right. If it was meant to be, it would happen.

There was still hope. And if it didn’t happen, it wasn’t supposed to be.

I pulled myself up and limped over beside him.

I picked up a handful of rocks and started throwing them into the water, balancing on one leg.

I picked up a piece of polystyrene that had washed up on the sand. ‘Hey, want to make a boat?’

Niall laughed. ‘Obviously.’