Page 18 of Loki’s Spellbinder (Hunters Creek Archangel’s Warriors MC #14)

I’d kept my mouth shut for five long ass days.

I took in everything I could at Braelyn’s office, her apartment complex, and even the grocery store when we needed to stock up on supplies.

There hadn’t been any odd sightings or anyone paying inappropriate attention to her.

She’d received no threats, yet my neck would itch, and I felt eyes on us whenever we were outside her apartment.

She said she felt the same way when I mentioned it to her.

We’d kept our distance from any of the Pagans. I knew some were outside at night. During the day, the club and I agreed that with the security at the courthouse and me there, she didn’t need them. At night, I had to get some sleep, so they were appreciated.

The two of us had settled into a routine, and things were more relaxed between us.

I had numerous funny and intelligent conversations with her.

She kept me intrigued and looking forward to what she might say or do next.

We fixed dinner together when we got back to her place after work every night and let the conversations flow.

Tonight, after we ate, I gave her a couple of hours to do more work, and then we’d watch television or talk.

There were so many topics we hit on. I thought we were getting along wonderfully.

So what was I keeping my mouth shut about for five days?

One word. Eli. I wanted her to tell me about him, but she’d avoided anything to do with him that wasn’t strictly work-related.

Since my initial meeting with Eli Jenner, my conviction that he was interested in being more than Braelyn’s boss had grown.

His unhappiness with me as her bodyguard hadn’t abated.

Whenever we ran into him, he was unfailingly lovely to her and barely acknowledged me.

I didn’t care. He’d made his feelings known when he tried to deny me access to the courthouse at first. He insisted I could remain outside and that it was perfectly safe inside.

Braelyn had pointed out that his bodyguard, Hendrix, was allowed in the building.

Eli tried to argue that the threat was different to him.

When he did, Brae stated that she’d be working from home unless she had to be in court, so she’d be safe.

He hadn’t liked the idea. No doubt because it meant we’d be alone twenty-four seven.

Eli had dropped it, and I was allowed in the building.

The only place I couldn’t be with her was when she was in a work meeting with him or someone else.

He spouted off about confidentiality, even though I’d signed a non-disclosure for anything I might hear or see.

He was upset that my background had come back sparkling. I knew Outlaw would ensure it did.

Hendrix had been my silent companion outside the office during those meetings.

The man wasn’t talkative, but then again, neither was I.

He looked like he could handle himself. He was close to my height of six feet four.

He was muscular, with tats on his lower arms. I’d seen them when he pushed up his sleeves.

I had full sleeves of tattoos on my arms and others across my chest and back.

He was watchful, and nothing seemed to get by him.

I should’ve felt reassured that Brae and Eli would be safe with both of us here, but something kept pushing at me that she wasn’t.

Personally, I didn’t care about her boss.

What was burning in my gut was the question—what was her relationship with him?

He gave off this possessiveness about her.

Had they been lovers? Eli Jenner wanted Braelyn and hated that I was in her life.

I knew that without a doubt. And then there was Chaos.

He hadn’t been able to come around, but I knew she’d talked to him more than a few times.

She’d go to her room when he called. Or she’d get texts throughout the day that made her smile, roll her eyes, or mutter.

I was drowning in my desire for her and fighting not to go all primal and warn both men and anyone else who thought they wanted her to stay away.

Braelyn was mine. This week cemented that for me.

No matter how scared I was of it going to hell, I knew I had to give it my best shot.

Not to do it would haunt me for the rest of my life.

I’d explode soon if I didn’t know if we had a chance.

That was why I’d arranged for us to pick up dinner on our way home from work tonight.

It was Friday. We had the weekend to ourselves.

I didn’t want her to be distracted by anything because after we ate, I would sit her down and broach the topic.

Bull had advised me to do it. According to him, there would never be a perfect time.

He and I had talked a few times since I arrived.

As the time drew near to talk, I became more tense. I tried to speak and act normally, but I knew Braelyn was picking up on it. Dinner passed with minimal talk, which wasn’t like us. I caught her casting worried glances my way. When the dishes were cleaned, I knew it was time.

“Brae, come to the living room. There’s something I need to talk to you about.”

“Okay. Loki, I know something has been bothering you. Are you about to tell me?” she asked as we made our way the short distance from the kitchen to her living area.

“I am. First, though, I have a few questions, and I’m not sure if you’ll like them. However, I need your honest answers to discuss what’s on my mind. I hope that makes sense.”

We were seated on the couch, turned at an angle so we could see each other easily. She appeared apprehensive. I didn’t know how else to do it other than to dive right into it. Sugarcoating and dancing around something wasn’t me when I’d made up my mind.

“I need to ask you about Eli.”

She stiffened. Damn it, there was something there she didn’t want me to know.

“What about him?” she asked slowly.

I pushed forward. “I feel that Eli doesn’t want me around, and it’s more than a professional issue. He’s interested in you romantically. I need to know. Is there a reason for him to be upset that I’m in your life? Did I step into something by coming here and telling him I’m your man?”

Her mouth dropped open. A small gasp escaped, and then she shook her head vigorously. “Oh God, no, no, Loki, there’s nothing between me and Eli. I’m not in anything but a professional relationship with him. And I’ve never been in anything but that. I don’t see him that way.”

Her adamant denial eased some of the tension inside of me. However, I had to ensure she knew he didn’t feel the same. “Have you told him that? Has he expressed to you that he wants more?”

She hesitated before she answered me. “Yes, as a matter of fact, I did—more than once. He’s been resistant to taking my answer as final. Don’t get me wrong. He hasn’t harassed me or done anything inappropriate, but I know he wants more than to be my boss. I explained why it wouldn’t happen.”

“How long has he been wanting more?”

I wanted to know, but it didn't make a difference in what I would do. He couldn’t take no for an answer? Then, I’d make sure I was the one to get him to see it was the best thing for his health.

“I know that look. It’s like what Wrath and Rage get. I don’t need you to say anything to him. That’s my business,” she warned.

“How long?” I demanded.

She stubbornly remained quiet. I let her think she got away with it by moving to the next topic.

“What’s the deal with you and Chaos? You two seemed close when you came to Hunters Creek two weeks ago. He was here when you came back from South Carolina, and he wanted to stay and be your bodyguard. Did I step into something between the two of you?”

“Chaos and I are good friends. We like to spend time together when we can. Sometimes, we get into hilarious adventures. He’s concerned for me and would’ve loved to be here. I wouldn’t object if I knew he’d be safe.”

Her answer didn’t tell me much. I tried again. “But are you more than friends? Or do you want him to be more than that? Do you have romantic feelings for him? Or vice versa?”

“What difference does that make, Loki? God, what’s up with asking me all these personal questions? What if I start asking you about your personal life? You wouldn’t like that,” she snapped.

Deciding to humor her and swing back to it, I leaned back on the pillow behind me. I twirled my finger in the air. “Alright, go for it. What do you want to ask me?”

“You wouldn’t tell me,” she said skeptically.

“Yes, I will. Ask.”

Brae wiggled herself into a more comfortable position. She’d changed into her lounging clothes when we got home. Either was hot to me. She raised her knees until they were bent, and she could wrap her arms around them. She rested her chin on the top of her knees.

“You came here at the direction of your president to help protect me. I’m not sure why they chose you, but regardless.

Did you leave someone behind who’s pissed at me for taking you away from her?

Do you call and talk to her at night after I go to bed?

Tell her you’ll be back soon and how much you miss her.

” Brae asked. I didn’t think she’d start there.

“No, I didn’t leave a woman behind. I don’t have a girlfriend or an old lady. No one is pissed that I’m here.”

She snorted in disbelief.

“What’s that for? You think I’m lying? What if I say you’re not telling me the truth about Eli and Chaos?” I challenged.

“You can say it, but it’s not true. I’m not saying you’re lying about not having an old lady or girlfriend, but you can’t expect me to believe there is no woman there who isn’t upset that you’re gone indefinitely.

What about all those women who flock to the club to party and fuck you guys? And let’s not forget the bunnies.

“I know how that works, Loki. The Pagans are my club family, but I see and hear shit. I’ve learned what the biker lifestyle is about.

Before Wrath and Rage settled down, it was parties, sex, and booze.

For the single ones, it’s still that way.

I know it’s the same for your club and every other club on the planet. ”

When she spoke of the other women, there was this tiny undertone that made my heart speed up. If I was correct, it was hostility. I chose to test my theory. I shrugged my shoulders casually.

“I’m a man. Of course, I have sex. Those women who come to the club or are bunnies know the score. It’s non-committed sex. And before you say that’s using them, no, it’s not. I make it clear before it ever goes anywhere that if we hook up, it’s nothing more than a mutual release.”

“You might agree, but that doesn’t guarantee that feelings can’t develop unexpectedly.

Don’t let this go to your head, but you’re an attractive man.

You can be personable, and you have some gentlemanly manners.

You have a steady income working for the club.

I heard someone mention you even have a house on the compound.

That’s more than most women ever dream of having. ”

“What do you dream of having?” I slipped in.

“We’re not talking about me.”

“I still want to know. What is it you want from a man?”

“I want what Mom found with Rage. Someone who loves me unconditionally. His words and gestures show me how he feels about me. He wouldn’t be afraid to demonstrate it in front of his friends or strangers.

He’d build a home with me and, hopefully, want a family.

Looks aren’t big for me, though I wouldn’t say no to a good-looking man.

But I would never want to stay with someone who degraded me, verbally or physically abused me or our kids, or cheated on me.

I don’t need a man to keep me financially.

I make a good wage. I can take care of myself.

And if I were also sexually satisfied, that would be my perfect man.

He’d be open to my returning all those things to him.

He can be protective, while I’m the same way with him. It would be a partnership.”

I swallowed past the knot in my throat. I had to find out her answer about Chaos, and then it would be time to confess where my head was.

Everything she stated she wanted aligned with my long-ago dream.

I’d pushed it away, but it still lived within me.

All I had to do was be brave enough to give it a chance.

After all the thinking I’d done for months and the recent conversations with Bull, I was determined not to let the past ruin my future.