Page 43 of Lessons in Chemistry

I know what Casey told Emory isn’t true. I hate being the keeper of that secret. It shouldn’t be a secret at all. I get that Casey wants time to figure his head out, but why couldn’t he tell Emory that? They’re meant to be best friends. I guess people do weird things when they’re in love. Something about not thinking straight. I’d blame it on thinking with my dick, but Casey is thinking with his heart. It’s a shame his heart is making him do dumb things.

“He told me I should explore my attraction to you,” Emory says.

“What do you want?”

He shrugs. “I guess I don’t have to be confused anymore. I don’t have to choose between my feelings for the two of you either.” His face goes bright red. He covers it with his hands. “Assuming you even like me. I know last night was fake.”

“It wasn’t.”

He looks up. “It—”

“I like you, Emory. You know I’m normally a love them and leave them kind of guy. I enjoy sex and don’t need to know the name of the man I’m sleeping with. In fact, I often prefer not to.”

Emory widens his eyes until they’re the size of saucers. “Is that what you want from me? Nameless sex?” He scrunches his eyes up.

I cover my mouth with my hand to stifle a laugh.

“Not nameless sex. You know my name. But a one-night stand. Is that all you want?”

“No.”

“Why should I believe you?”

“You’re different. Maybe it’s because you intimidate me on a daily basis or because you’re one of the cutest guys I know, but I want to hang out with you. I don’t want to bang you and move on.” I can’t believe I said all that, but it’s the truth. The time I’ve spent with Emory—and Casey, for that matter—has felt more genuine than anything else in my life. It’s scary.

Emory coughs and then drinks some of his iced coffee. “You need to stop making me choke.”

“Sorry. It’s a habit.” I wink.

“Why do I intimidate you?”

I wave at his bag. “Because you’re so damn smart. All that stuff comes easily to you.”

“I enjoy it, that’s all.”

I fake a shudder. “How can you enjoy science and maths?”

“Because it’s fun, and it’s what I want to do.”

I shudder again. “You’re either sick or in need of psychiatric help. I’m not sure which yet.”

He chuckles.

“That’s better. You look a lot cuter when you’re smiling. But all that said, I’m not going to charge in and convince you to go out with me.”

He blinks. “You’re not?”

“No. I’m here with you now because I wanted to make sure you’re okay. Nothing more.” Huh, maybe I can be a half-decent guy once in a while. I’m quite proud of myself. Hopefully, it will also prove to him that I want more than sex.

Emory dips his chin. “I’m going to lose you both.”

“No. I’m still here, as a friend. For now. And Casey’s still your best friend, isn’t he?”

“I think so. I hope so. Things were weird between us last night, and I didn’t see him this morning, because he went to training early. I imagine things are going to be strange for a while, at least. I toyed with his emotions. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“Blame me. It was my dumb idea.”

He half smiles. “That I went along with.”