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CHAPTER TEN

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WAVE OF SUPPORT FROM FEMALE RACING FANS SWEEPS THE INTERNET IN THE WAKE OF PARAGON RACING BOMBSHELL

Whoever said women don’t like racing is eating their words today. If you’re tuned in to the sport at all, you can’t take a breath without seeing the brand new enthusiasm for Vanessa Lennon, Formula 1’s first female driver. While the racing world at large is still unsure of the team’s choice, the female fans aren’t. Move aside, gentlemen. A whole new wave of fans is here.

CENTRAL RACING NEWS

I opened my eyes slowly and wasn’t sure where I was. For a second, I thought I was in the back of the SUV with Beck, lying with him. But we’d gotten past that. Into the elevator…

Purring vibrated smoothly nearby, soothing any worries I had. I was safe. And?—

Looking up, I found dark blue eyes on mine. River Daniels looked down at me where I was draped over his lap, a smile on his face. River Daniels, the current Formula 1 champion, and my scent match. And I passed out before I could meet him.

Mint . Freshness whirled into my lungs followed by the dark, rich sweetness of chocolate. He was mine too. They were all mine. I flushed, unable to look away from him, a little mortified that I’d passed out, but still high enough on all their scents that I didn’t think I could move.

River smiled deeper when he saw me looking at him, tightening his hold. “Hey, baby.”

My stomach flipped. Two words shouldn’t make me feel like I was standing in a tornado of butterflies. Yet they did. “Hi.”

He leaned down at the same time as I reached the one thing I could move and touched his face to make sure he was real. His skin was warm, and I must have imagined him leaning into my touch. Clearly I was still dreaming. I was definitely still high on the four of them.

With one hand beneath my neck, he lifted me the remaining distance between us and kissed me. I made a sound I’d never made before, somewhere between a moan and a whimper, and it unlocked everything. River crushed me to him, deepening the kiss until neither of us could tell who was tangled where. Pure heat and desire came with every gasped breath of his scent. This was real.

This was real .

He still held me to his chest when we broke apart, me leaning on him awkwardly. But he didn’t seem to care.

“I’m furious that we never met before,” he whispered. “We could have been doing this the whole time.”

The way his heat and scent wrapped around me, I couldn’t disagree with the sentiment. “We have now.”

He tilted my face up so he could kiss me again, smiling. “We have now.”

I stared at him, unable to look away. My head swam with the threads of all their scents. “How long did I pass out for?”

“Not long,” Beck’s voice came from behind me. “Not even thirty minutes.”

“Sorry.”

“Don’t be,” River said with a gleam in his eye. “It’s better that you didn’t pass out in my arms. We both know my ego doesn’t need to think I can make my Omega pass out at the sight of me.”

I laughed at that and simply leaned more onto him. My Omega did things I didn’t want to admit. All of this did things to me I didn’t want to admit. I was a racing driver. I didn’t take shit from anyone and I certainly wasn’t soft. Not the way I was at the moment. Not soft like many Omegas were. I’d never had that luxury.

Maybe I was wrong, and this was a dream. It was all a dream and I would wake up before the announcement all over again.

River began to purr again, and any doubts about reality drifted away.

My brain was still fuzzy, but when I went to sit up, he helped me. We were in a gorgeous apartment above the city, the classic Britannian clouds spitting rain at the windows.

“We ordered food,” Beck said. “And Elias grabbed you some clothes if you want to get out of the suit.”

I found Elias near the windows, that same grin on his face. “Your clothes?”

“They are.”

Though I did my best to hide the smile that came to my face at that—along with the heat—none of them were fooled. The idea of being entirely cocooned in any of their scents was too good to be true. “I will change. Thank you.”

Beck stood and pointed. “The bathroom is just down the hallway there.”

I scooped up the clothes and escaped before I could think about doing or saying anything else. The soft berry scent rising from the fabric in my arms was enough to make me bury my face in them, but at the same time, I was glad they were Elias’s clothes. His Beta scent wouldn’t call to my instincts the same way and would make it easier. Did they do that on purpose?

There was a text on my phone when I pulled it out of my pocket. Annika, even though she said she’d check in tomorrow.

Annika

You still alive?

Vanessa

Yes.

And mortified.

I passed out in the elevator because of their scents.

Annika

Vanessa

It’s not funny! I woke up in River’s lap.

Annika

Vanessa

You’re disowned.

Annika

I’m not, but nice try. Glad you’re still alive. Try to have fun.

Vanessa

I don’t even know what to do in this situation.

Annika

Let loose? You never get to do that.

Wasn’t that the fucking truth.

Vanessa

We’ll see.

Annika

I pulled off the racing suit and underlayers, nearly groaning as I stepped into Elias’s sweatpants. They were way too big, but they were soft and I might have been wrong about his scent affecting me less. They needed to be rolled a few times so I didn’t slip on them.

The crew neck sweatshirt slipped off my shoulder revealing my sports bra, but I didn’t mind it. Annika was right. I never let loose. This could be a first step.

After I folded my clothes, I set them on a table near the elevator before returning to the living room. My feet were bare, and the second they looked at me, my toes curled under themselves.

This feeling of being awkward and unsure was so alien that all I could do was stand there. This wasn’t who I was. No matter what was put in front of me, I could face it without fear. That’s who you had to be as a racer.

Literally the only situation I wasn’t prepared for was this one .

Which was why I felt like I was spinning out of control. I laughed nervously. “I’m sorry. I honestly don’t know what to do here.”

Elias blew out a breath. “Thank fuck, because I don’t either. But you look good in my clothes.”

I hid my hands in the sleeves of the sweatshirt, enjoying being surrounded by how good it smelled. Everything still shone like the world glittered, gilded and gorgeous, because every time I inhaled it was another hit of scents made perfectly for me.

I needed to sit down. But where did I sit? There were four of them, and I didn’t want to seem like I was choosing one of them over the others already.

Like Beck could see the thoughts in my head, he grabbed the blanket I’d been wrapped in when I woke up and moved it next to him on the smaller couch. He lifted it up, inviting me to sit with him and taking the choice out of my hands.

The relief in my chest was unfamiliar, but welcome. I didn’t let people choose for me. I chose. But now, it was nice to not have to worry about it. We all had plenty of other things to worry about.

He went a step further, pulling me into him as soon as I sat, arranging me under the blanket but against his body.

“Thank you,” I whispered.

“Safe to say we’re all in unknown waters, love.”

My stomach flipped again, reacting to the nickname. I relaxed without even consciously deciding to. The arm slung around my hip tightened. It didn’t matter if I was still high as fuck off them. I was safe. I felt it.

Grayson leaned forward and looked at me. “I need to ask you this, Vanessa.” He sounded so serious my stomach clenched.

“Okay?”

“This was unexpected.” He shook his head like he was still dazed. I knew the feeling. “And I know your instincts are going wild. But I need to ask if this is something you want?”

Dread poured over me like ice water, followed by fear. Had I misread something? “Oh. Right. I?—”

Grayson stood and crossed the small distance before lowering to one knee in front of me. When he held his hands out for mine, I gave them. “I didn’t ask you that because we don’t want you.” His voice was quiet but fierce. “I ask because this was the biggest day of your life in an entirely different way. And though it might ruin me, I would understand if that was what you wanted or needed to focus on.” He pulled me forward until our foreheads touched again, just like they had in his office. “I’m sorry I made you doubt this, even for a moment.”

Beck’s hand slowly stroked down my spine, adding comfort and soothing away that sudden pain that I’d felt everywhere .

Of course I could choose to walk away. I’d heard of the rare case where an Omega didn’t want to be with their scent matches for one reason or another. Now that I’d experienced this, I couldn’t imagine it. How could you feel this sense of knowing and safety and want anything else? Ever?

“I want it,” I managed. “I’m scared, but I want it.”

Grayson hummed, his hands squeezing mine. “Why are you scared?”

“Because I don’t know how to do this. I don’t know how to be an Omega. I barely feel like one half the time. When I’m in the paddock I have to ignore every instinct because I’m surrounded by Alphas who don’t want me there. I have to be strong every second, and I don’t know how to fully let that go. I also want to be able to do that with you, because… fuck , it feels so good. But on top of that, we have to work together and I need to trust that you’ll be able to treat me like I’m Vanessa the driver and not Vanessa the Omega.

“I don’t want to lose everything I’ve worked for alongside craving all of this. It’s another tightrope to walk. I already have a few of those I’m balancing, and I have no idea what happens when I fall. Because I will. I’m not perfect and I won’t be perfect even if I try. So I’m terrified. I don’t say that often, because not much scares me.”

Silence filled the air after I stopped talking.

“Holy shit I didn’t mean for all of that to come out at once.”

“We’ll catch you,” Beck said.

I twisted to look at him, though Gray still held my hands. “What?”

“That’s what happens when you fall. We’ll catch you.” The way he said it was so simple and so straightforward, I couldn’t not believe him.

“The team chose you for what you can do,” Elias said. “We’re certainly not going to change that, or doubt it. We have enough self control to only help with the battles you want us to, even if we’re tempted. But we’re not perfect either, so we’ll have to be on the ropes with you.”

Grayson transferred both my hands into one of his and guided my gaze back to his. “You can be both with us.”

“Promise?”

He smiled, eyes crinkling. “Promise, little one.”

I bit my lip. “I shouldn’t like that so much.”

“I’ll never use it in front of anyone who might use it against you.”

It was so easy to lean forward and rest my head on his shoulder. Listen to his purr. Relax into this. “Still going to be fucking weird and hard though.”

River burst out with a laugh. “No doubt. I do have a slightly awkward question.”

Settling back to cuddle into Beck, I smiled. “What?”

“John.” He winced. “Will he be a problem?”

I waved a hand. “No. Don’t get me wrong, he tells the media every chance he gets that he wants me back, but half of that is just riling them up. I’m the one who ended it.”

John Lockwood. Or Johnny. The driver I’d subbed in for last season, which gave me this opportunity in the first place. We’d dated a few years ago before he was in Formula 1 and I was still working my way up. The closer he got to achieving his goal, the worse boyfriend he became. “It wasn’t cheating or anything like that, we just… didn’t work. So no, it won’t be a problem. Actually, whatever rumors go around about the two of us, and I’m sure there will be some, might help us with this.” I gestured to the five of us.

A low growl shivered through the air. River. He shook his head, clearly fighting his Alpha. “Sorry. You’re right, but I will hate it when it happens. Not going to apologize for it.”

I hid my smile in the neck of Elias’s sweatshirt, unwilling to show just how much I liked that possessive instinct. After a lifetime of everyone trying to shove me out of spaces, having them claim me was a feeling I would never get over.

“So we just… pretend this doesn’t exist while we’re in public?” I asked.

Elias dropped onto the couch next to River. “Easier said than done.”

“No kidding.”

Grayson set a hand on my knee before moving back to his seat. “For now, yes. I have no idea how to announce this, and I already told them I’d rather not think about it tonight. Other than to ask what your schedule is? At least for tomorrow? I wish we had more time.”

Winter testing began in three days. We’d waited as long as possible to announce this, which worked for our original plan and was now biting us in the ass. “Apparently my grandfather hired me an assistant, and he’ll be in touch with Tracy. So I don’t know, but I agree. Oh, and I told Annika. But she won’t say anything.”

They didn’t bat an eye at that.

“I’ll need things from my apartment. We’ll have to see how aggressive the press is and whether I can get there and back here without being seen.”

When I looked up they were all smiling like mad. “What?”

“We like that you assume you’ll be staying here,” Elias said, a twinkle in his eye. “Please assume. Because that’s what we want.”

I swallowed. “I can’t wear your clothes the whole time, so…”

“I mean, I wouldn’t complain about that.”

We laughed, and I looked back at Grayson. “Other than needing Annika for training, I don’t have anything. I guess we’ll see tomorrow.”

He nodded once. “Enough business for tonight. The food is almost here. Theater room?” A look at Beck.

“On it.”

Beck stood and lifted me, blankets and all, carrying me through the house. “You don’t have to?—”

He slowed and met my gaze. There was such passion there at the same time as calm steadiness. I wasn’t sure how he managed it. “You can be both,” he said quietly. “But so can we. You’re here, and this is just as new to us. We already know how to treat you as a driver, and we will. We need to learn how to treat you like an Omega just as much as you need to figure out how to relax into being one. And my Alpha refuses to let you out of my arms.”

Twisting my arms around his neck, I leaned up and kissed him. Cedar and smoke and my own perfume spiraling around us. “Okay.”

He caught my lips again, kissing me longer and harder as he walked. But he smiled when we broke apart. “Okay.”