Page 27 of Declan (Gold Team #5)

Christ .

She was spectacular.

Autumn’s soft body pressed deeper and I fought to keep our kiss gentle. My dick painfully hard in my pants, and the hungry sounds she made, only intensified my need.

I slowed the kiss, leisurely stroking, taking one more taste before I pulled away. Her responding mew made me smile.

My girl liked to kiss. Which was damn good, because I planned on kissing her as often as I could.

“Where are your parents staying?”

She blinked at my question then frowned. “Why are we talking about my parents?”

Hell, yeah, she liked to kiss.

“Because I don’t want them walking in here and finding us making out.

I exchanged a handful of words with your dad before I took off.

Don’t think I made the best first impression so I figure if I wanna live long enough to get you to a place where I have you waking up beside me for the rest of my life, I might want to put some effort into not giving your dad a reason to kill me. ”

Autumn’s lips hitched up. And a miracle happened, the grin took her from sexy to child-like innocence. Which made me want to kiss her again.

I waited for the ball of guilt to appear, to choke me, to fill my gut with acid, but it never came. I felt the absence so acutely my legs shook.

Fucking, fucking , hell .

It had been so long since I hadn’t felt that weight I’d forgotten how heavy it was.

“I don’t know,” she answered. “Mom didn’t get that far in her, Put the Family Back Together plan. She just started bossin’. Told me to pack my bag and demanded my dad get us to Maryland.”

“Where’s your rental car?”

“Turned it in. We flew here. Ashaki blew in, said a bunch of stuff, then my mom just kind of…I don’t know…

snapped? Woke up? I don’t know what to call it other than it was the first time I’d seen my mom be herself since before I was taken.

I know Dad saw it, too, so he did what he’d always done, and gave my mom what she wanted. ”

“Put the Family Back Together plan?”

Autumn sighed and looked around the kitchen. “Can we maybe get something to eat first, then I’ll tell you everything?”

I watched her closely and saw no signs of her shutting down, dodging the question, yeah. But I figured after all we’d discussed she needed a break.

“One thing before we go get food. What did Ashaki say to your mom that she was right about?”

Autumn’s head tilted slightly and her forehead wrinkled.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“When I met your mom she said, Ashaki was right. And she said it smiling,” I explained.

Pink hit Autumn’s cheeks and I was mesmerized.

Damn, she was cute.

But now I had to know what Ash had said .

“Autumn?”

“Well, she came by to tell me I was fired, she’d dismantled my network, told everyone I was under your protection, namedropped Zane as well, told my parents I was a consultant with the CIA.

Then she told me to find you and be happy.

Oh, and she told me that Barny Pollaski was the man who killed her family. ”

All of that was fucking fantastic, especially the part of spreading the word that Autumn was indeed under my protection, and by extension, not only Zane’s but every member of Z Corps.

But it didn’t explain why Autumn’s cheeks were pink and why Meggy had said Ashaki was right.

“What else did she say?”

“She said you were wildly in love with me,” she rushed out.

Tension coiled and my muscles tightened.

What the fuck ?

“Come again?”

Autumn flinched and she whispered, “I know she doesn’t know what she’s talking about.”

“No, baby, I don’t give the first fuck she thinks that or if she spread that far and wide. What I care about is how she came to think that? Did you tell her about us? And you need to know, I don’t care if you did, I just need to know.”

“No. I didn’t tell anyone.”

“Fuck.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Babe, she had to come to that conclusion one way or another. And the only way for her to do that was by her watching us. Which begs the question, why the fuck is she watching us?”

A hundred different scenarios rolled around in my head.

Zane said Ashaki had gone off the grid, but that was just recently. It explained her appearance in Iowa but not her lurking around Annapolis before that.

“I need to call Zane.”

“She would never hurt me. Or you,” Autumn told me, and I wanted to believe her but I couldn’t.

I pulled my phone out of my back pocket and made a call I didn’t want to make.

“It’s Sunday, someone better be bleeding.”

“Ashaki Maloof’s had eyes on me. Fucks me to say it, but I had no clue. Need a sit-down.”

“Did you just say that woman’s been tailing you and you didn’t know?”

“Yep.” My answer was met with laughter. “Not seeing what the fuck is funny, Z.”

“No, you wouldn’t, seeing as you’ve had your head so full of Autumn Pierce you missed a tail.” Zane chuckled again and I felt my temper boiling.

“Zane—”

“All right. All right. How about this? I’ve heard nothing but you bitchin’ about Thad, Kyle, and Brooks and the struggles they faced.

You didn’t complain too much about Max. So, to conclude, you fucked everyone by sorting your shit in private.

Not a single one of your men get payback for the shit you shoveled at them.

So, I’m gonna share this intel. That the Recon specialist, the Marine, missed a CIA agent tailin’ him. Priceless. Be at the office in twenty.”

“I got Autumn with me.”

“I’ll bring the snacks.”

And with that, the asshole hung up.

Then I smiled.

I might’ve missed Ashaki following me, but Z was mostly right. I’d sorted my shit, mostly in private, and only had to endure one day of airing it in front of the team.

“Let’s get a move on, baby, we gotta head into the office.”

“You want me to go? ”

I shook my head. “Teamwork, Autumn. We’re a team. You go where I go.”

“But Zane—”

“He’s a marshmallow and a sucker for a pretty girl.”

He was absolutely not that, and I’d find myself with a bullet hole in the gut if he heard me say it.

“You’re such a liar.”

“You’re right, I am. He’s a sarcastic asshole but he’d step in front of a bullet for you.”

“He doesn’t even know me.”

“Baby, you’re mine. Before that, you were Thad’s sister-in-law. He doesn’t need to know you.”

“That’s just crazy.”

“It is? You barely know Thad. Yet you know your sister loves him, and I know that’s enough for you to go all out and protect him just so your sister doesn’t lose what she loved.”

I lost Autumn’s eyes when her gaze skidded to the left, then she looked anywhere but at me.

I was right, Autumn talked a lot of shit about not wanting to be in her sister’s life, yet she would take a bullet for her.

She’d do it with no hesitation with that in mind, I was unsure why she looked upset.

“What’s got you thinking so hard, baby?”

“I’m yours?”

For years I’d done everything in my power to lock everyone out.

I’d suppressed any feeling that had the barest hint of happiness, honesty, or family.

I wanted nothing to do with those emotions, I fed on guilt and loneliness.

I spooned that shit up and shoveled it in as fast as I could, especially when my sister was around.

So how in the hell did I go from that to pouring my heart out?

“Yeah, Autumn, you’re mine.” Then I decided since we were letting it all swing in the wind, I’d give her more.

“Not pleased your girl’s been hanging around watching me, less pleased I didn’t clock her while she was doing it.

Something’s off about that. But, while she was watching, she was obviously paying attention.

And, Autumn, she is not wrong in her assessment.

I might not be able to give you those words right now, but you have to know I feel things for you I’ve never felt.

And that’s screwing with my head. I need to sort that out and come to terms with it.

In the meantime, you mean something to me, something that’s deep and consuming.

So for now, we’re gonna leave it at, yeah, you’re mine. Which also means I’m yours.”

“Do you like tacos?”

The change of topic was so abrupt my body jerked and the muscles in my neck spasmed.

“Uh…sure.”

“I haven’t looked, but unless you went to the grocery store since I’ve been gone, we’re gonna have to stop on the way home so I can pick up what I need.”

“I didn’t go to the store.”

She nodded and made her way across the room to grab her backpack.

I was debating the merits of giving her that play—the change of subject, taking the topic to something mundane after the heavy one we’d had.

Especially knowing what was about to come, but I couldn’t drop it when her body language was screaming that there was something wrong.

“Babe?”

“Huh?”

“You okay?”

“You’re better at this than me.”

“Better at what?”

“This sharing stuff. I’m trying to figure out how you went from grunting and one-word answers to… this . I know how to deal with the other Declan. But this Declan, the one that’s all flowery and open, I don’t know what to do with him.”

“Flowery? Never in my life has anyone accused me of being flowery or open. And you know you’re the only woman in the world who would think anything I just said was flowery.”

“Yeah, well, I’m also a woman who’s never had a man claim me in a way that felt good.”

Fucking Christ .

“Baby—”

“You know, never in my life did I think I’d want to belong to someone after what happened to me.

” She paused and worried her bottom lip, something I’d learned she did when she was drawing up courage.

Something she did a lot and always bested, therefore I waited for her to continue.

“I don’t need the words, Dec. Words are meaningless.

As a matter of fact, I don’t want the words, I just want you however you come.

At this point, I don’t know much of anything, but I do know I spent three weeks without you and it hurt in a way I couldn’t deny.

So, I’m ready to walk through fire with you.

But fair warning, Declan, there may be times when I need to crawl. ”

Sweet Jesus .

That slammed into my gut and my chest with equal measure. The pain so exquisite, I let it blaze a path until my body was engulfed in the beauty she’d just given me.

“And she says I’m better at this,” I mumbled.

“Baby, we’ll run, walk, or crawl. There will be times I’ll carry you and times you’ll have to carry me.

I am man enough to admit, I got problems and sometimes those problems weigh me down.

But I’m also smart enough to know you’re strong enough to handle them.

We’re a team, Autumn. You and me gotta work to make this good, to give the other what they need. We do that, we’ll find paradise.”

And there it was again, hope. Only this time it didn’t flash in her eyes—it overtook her entire being. A look so devastatingly beautiful, I’d fight and die to keep that look.