Page 71 of Breadwinner
“Unfortunately.”
Sarah couldn’t help the involuntary way she began to smile, thinking about Nell at Disney World, of all places. “You’re kidding.”
“I wish I were. We’ve been at Magic Kingdom since it opened this morning. Nate insists on it every year. Our StanGrant Christmas tradition.”
Sarah laughed, feeling oddly reassured that she wasn’t the only one partaking in holiday traditions a bit begrudgingly this year. “I’m having a hard time picturing you there. You hate crowds.”
“Correct. And also small children whose parents leave them unattended, and slow walkers. But I love Nate,” Nell said flatly, “and this happens to be what he loves, so here I am. It would be much more enjoyable if he let me pay for a few VIP services...” Sarah could imagine clearly the look Nell must be shooting at Nate right now—cutting on the surface, but underneath, pure adoration. “But he says it ruins the ‘fun of the experience,’” she said loftily, “so here I am, pretending not to die inside.”
“You’re so dramatic!” Nate’s voice cut through over Nell’s. “She’s having a blast. I’ll send you some pics.”
“Excuse you,” came Nell’s stern voice. “This is my phone call. Don’t be rude.”
Sarah was beaming now. This was exactly what she needed. Talking to Nell always made her feel better.
Before she could stop herself, Sarah said offhandedly, “I kind of love that about you.”
“Mm?”
“That you never say no to indulging someone’s inner child, even when it means trading Jimmy Choos for Mickey ears.”
Nell snorted. “I don’t own Mickey ears.”
“I’m willing to bet you do. And, if you recall, I have quite the lucky streak.”
Sarah’s cheeks flushed as she thought back to their trip to Las Vegas and the way Nell had found new ways to embolden her.
“Oh, I remember.” A hint of tease slipped into Nell’s response. “But can we focus on the real issue here? Why did you call me?”
Sarah glanced through the window, back into the house. From her vantage point, she could just see into the living room, where Beth and Jamie were cozied back on the couch.
“Everyone is at my house for Christmas celebrations. Beth asked for tea. She said ‘love,’ like she always used to call me, and for a moment, I forgot that’s not who I am to her anymore. Jamie and I answered at the same time.”
“Oh,” Nell said quietly.
Sarah suddenly wondered if this was okay to discuss with Nell. They’d talked about her feelings for Beth before—Nell was aware of how she felt—but this was the first time Sarah felt maybe this wasn’t a conversation Nell wanted to be a part of.
“Is it okay that we’re talking about this?” Sarah asked.
“You can talk to me about anything. I’m always here for you. Please, continue.”
To others, Nell might come across a little cold, but Sarah knew that underneath that exterior was a woman who cared so deeply for those who were important to her. She needed that right now.
“It was fucking mortifying, Nell. Jamie didn’t make a big deal out of it, thankfully, but the look she gave me? God, it was worse than pity. Now I’m trying to figure out how I’m going to goback in there and be fine.” She groaned into the phone. “Sorry, I don’t even know why I’m telling you all this,” she said, her voice caught on the edge of the frustration she was holding back.
“Rule number nine, Sarah. Never apologize for wanting to be known. You’re telling me because you trust me and you know I won’t judge you. Both of which are important to me,” Nell replied simply.
Sarah’s voice was quiet with her response. “You’re right, I do.”
They each sat in the silence of that admission until Nell broke it.
“Merry Christmas, by the way,” Nell said, steering the conversation away from Beth, for which Sarah was extremely grateful. “I have a present for you that should cheer you up.”
“Yeah? What crazy, outlandish thing did you get me?” she teased gently. “A yacht? A villa in the south of France?”
“I opted for something a little more practical. Something you’ll actually enjoy. I’m whisking you away for a weekend in Whistler—just us. No phones. Skiing, hot tubs, spa days, the works. We’re going all outaprés-ski, baby.”
“That sounds like what I need right now. I can’t wait.”