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stassi

“Why does Damien need to be watched overnight? I haven’t let anyone watch him ever since I got home from the hospital and was able to live independently.” I sat in the stark kitchen on one of the metal barstools. “Is Ledger really able to watch Damien overnight?”

“I’m right here and can hear you,” Ledger shouted from where the TV was.

It was essentially one large room.

“I know you can hear me,” I laughed as Ledger walked over to us. I looked between the two guys. “He’s never going to want anything other than pizza since we’ve had it two nights this week.”

“I lived on pizza,” Ledger said and patted his rock-hard stomach. “And look at me.”

“I think you’re the exception, Ledger.”

“Back to business.” Alex cut in as he cleaned up the island. “I want to take you on a date next weekend. It’s really important to me, and it’ll more than likely require you to spend the night here.”

“Here?” I asked.

“Or a hotel.”

I shook my head, not wanting him to spend any more of his money on me.

“No. Here is fine, but I don’t get why Damien will need to be at Ledger’s...” I furrowed my brows. “Or why Ledger will need to be at my apartment.”

Ledger and Alex looked at each other, passing words without saying a single thing.

“Because he wants to take you somewhere to get fucked.” Ledger said it casually as he picked up an apple from the counter.

Alex jabbed him in the side.

“Ouch,” he shrieked.

“Shh,” Alex and I said in unison.

“Oh my god. You two are so fucking cute.” Ledger laughed as he threw himself back on the couch in the living room and turned on the baseball game quietly since Damien was already in bed.

Alex grabbed my hands. “I really want to take you out, and I think we’ll be back late, which is why I asked if Ledger could watch Damien, but if you aren’t comfortable.”

“No,” I sighed. “It’s okay. He really seems to like Ledger.” I walked over to the couch, getting in the way of Ledger and the TV. “I don’t ever want to feel like I’m imposing though. He’s my responsibili?—”

“Stop,” Ledger said and grabbed my hands, pulling me down on the couch next to him.

He really was like an overgrown golden retriever.

“I love Alex. He lo?—”

“What Ledger is trying to say is he doesn’t mind,” Alex said, sitting on the couch and pulling me closer to him.

I sensed that Alex didn’t appreciate how close Ledger was to me. Alex was typically calm, cool, and collected, but even with his friends, you could see a flicker of jealousy when Ledger or Dirks got too close.

“I really don’t,” Ledger added. “I enjoy the little guy, and my apartment has an extra bed. Alex is going to give me one of those toddler railings he has, and then we should be good. You guys won’t be far, so you can always come back and check on him.”

“Oh, so you know where we’re going?” I asked, raising an eyebrow.

Ledger shrugged, turning his attention back toward the TV. “Nope, no idea,” he said nonchalantly.

Alex’s lips turned into a mischievous grin. He had managed to snake his arms around my stomach, and he pulled me tight so I was snuggled up into the crook of his neck, his warmth enveloping me.

“Gimme the remote, Cole. We’re watching a rom-com, take it or leave it,” Alex demanded playfully.

“Ugh,” Ledger groaned, shooting us a mock look of annoyance, and rolled his eyes. “Fine. I’ll take it for tonight, but only because I need adult company.”

Alex chuckled and pressed his lips to my temple before clicking the remote to select a movie.

In an instant, it felt like we were back in time, except now with more physical touch because everything felt right in the moment.

The familiarity of it all was comforting as the movie played, our bodies intertwined on the couch.

The flickering light of the television cast a warm glow around the room, highlighting the serene expression on Alex’s face.

He traced lazy patterns on my arm, and a sense of contentment overwhelmed me.

It was moments like this that made me realize how much I missed.

Moments like this weighed heavily on me. I had so much regret in my life.

I threw this away because I was terrified of what life would look like if I never got better when, in reality, it would have looked a lot like this.

Alex might not think I noticed, but I saw the way he always regarded my inability to stand for too long or how kneeling on concrete hurt my knees.

I saw the simple things he did without casting too much attention on them.

I closed my eyes, swallowing my regret down hoping it didn’t bubble back up.

I turned my attention over to Ledger, who was sprawled on the other end of the couch.

He occasionally glanced over at us, a small smile playing on his lips despite his earlier grumbling.

The camaraderie between the three of us was easy.

I could see myself here—with them after Damien goes to bed, watching movies and sharing space.

I nestled deeper into Alex’s embrace, relishing the safety and security that only he could provide.

His hand found its way to my hair, gently stroking as the movie played on.

The intimate gesture sent shivers down my spine, making me feel even more connected to him.

I closed my eyes for a moment, savoring the feeling of being so close to the person who saved my life.

I thought I was broken and I’d never be able to find comfort in a man’s touch ever again because of what my ex did to me.

I thought I was always going to run away.

Truthfully, for almost five years, I did exactly that.

I avoided getting too close, never dated anyone for fear of what that touch would do to me.

But Alex’s touch brought comfort. It didn’t deter me.

In fact, I only wanted more of it. I was safe for the first time in a very long while.

Eventually, the movie reached its predictable, yet satisfying, conclusion.

Alex glanced down at me, a soft smile on his lips. “Enjoy the movie?” he whispered, his breath warm against my ear.

“Every second,” I murmured, smiling up at him, not actually talking about the movie. I had no idea what had happened, but I was hyper focused on the way I felt in Alex’s arms.

Ledger stretched and yawned, clearly ready to call it a night. “Alright, lovebirds, I’m heading to bed. Don’t stay up too late.”

“Night, Cole,” Alex and I said in unison, laughing softly at our synchronized farewell.

Alex shifted slightly, adjusting so we were more comfortable on the couch. “You know,” he said, his voice low and soothing, “I wouldn’t trade these moments for anything.”

“Neither would I,” I replied, feeling a surge of affection for him.

“Can I take you to bed?” Alex asked, gesturing down the hallway.

“Only if you’re in the mood for some more pineapple.” I winked and then skipped down the hallway.

“Oh, malyshka. You’re in for it.”