Page 20 of Surviving Slater

"You're the one who said you couldn't dous."

For several moments we stood, our eyes connected.

"I can't do emotions. I can't do relationships." He stepped closer, and my breath stilled.

"Icando this." He leaned closer and kissed me lightly before he pulled away. "This is what I want."

His hand slid to the back of my neck and pulled me closer when his mouth covered mine. Any resistance I had managed to muster crumbled under the heat of his kiss.

I gripped his shirt as his mouth moved over mine. I opened my lips slightly as I groaned against his lips. His tongue slid into my mouth and swept against my tongue. My stomach flipped at the action.

"I want you," he murmured against my lips. His free arm encircled my waist, pulling me closer to his body. My hands splayed over his hard chest. God, he felt so good.

Somewhere in the back of my mind a voice spoke up:Stop.

I tried to ignore it. I didn't want to think, I wanted to feel his body against mine. Giving in to the physical need of my body for his was what mattered. There was no feelings, no thinking.

When his lips broke from mine, I looked up at him as my tongue slid across my bottom lip while I struggled to breathe. His eyes darkened when they took in the small action.

This was so confusing. I had come over not knowing what to expect and now I was standing in front of him, breathless, trying to figure out what was happening.

"Do you want me?" he asked, looking confident, like he already knew the answer. His hand slid from my neck to rest on my hip.

I did, but I bit my tongue. I felt like I was a puppet being controlled by strings.

"Tell me you don't want this." His hand gripped my hip firmer, pulling me closer.

Being so close to him was intoxicating. Like that drunk feeling where you were floating and everything around you felt right and peaceful.

It would be so easy to say yes and fall into his arms. Our night together would make my world shift. It would be great. But what would happen when the night turned to day and our night together was finished?

I reminded myself how I felt when he had told me he couldn't give me what I wanted.

I woke up. My hand moved to the empty space beside me. It was dark but a soft light from the hallway lit the familiar room. I lifted myself up onto my elbow as I brushed my hair out of my face.

Then I found him. My heart spiked at the sight of him. He had that way of knocking me physically when those eyes found mine. He was leaning against the door, watching me silently with his arms crossed.

Heated kisses and a physical want that burned between us had led us to his bedroom. But the ghosts from my past had stopped it from going any further. My inability to deal with my issues was playing havoc with my life. Against my better judgment and at his insistence, I'd stayed the night. He hadn't wanted me catching a taxi so late.

"Slater." I spoke his name softly as I sat up. I held the blanket to my chest even though I was dressed in my shirt and underwear. My jeans still lay discarded on his bedroom floor. Maybe I was trying to hide my vulnerability.

He didn't answer. Instead, he continued to watch me without saying a word. I wasn't sure what to say.

"I'm sorry," I said, unsure of what to say to erase what had happened the night before.

"You have nothing to be sorry about," he said.

We were silent for a few moments. The air between us was uncomfortable and I didn't know what to say next. He let out a heavy breath. It was a strong sign that whatever he was going to say I wasn't going to like.

"I can't." He ran a hand through his hair. My frown deepened. A fear uncoiled in the pit of my stomach. I knew what was coming.

"I can't do this," he said, gesturing from me to him. The fear burned like a physical pain.

I swallowed a lump of emotion. The ache spread through my chest.

"Who said it was what I wanted?" I managed to say.

Had my freak-out the previous night scared him off? I couldn't help feeling self-conscious.