Page 32 of My Broken Mate (Healing Bonds #1)

Chapter twenty-one

The Concert

*KAT*

T he band’s called ETM – Exit The Moon – and I am still not sure if all of this was indeed a good idea. Sure, Remy seemed to be interested in joining us, and he has been attentive to me since I stepped into his room, so much that my heart flutters whenever I look at him.

I thought he was arrogant and stuck up, and hated me, but he doesn’t seem to be any of that.

I am still so scared of messing it up, though. He has only just begun opening up to me a little, and if he hates this place, the music, this night out, it will throw us back again. I don’t know why I always doubt everything, and why I am scared that every good thing will end, but I can’t help it.

On stage, the main vocalist, a young woman named KiZ, rocks her emo style with her spiky hair and goth clothes, while belting out her song into the microphone. Her lead guitarist, meanwhile, is dry-humping his guitar.

Goddess, don’t make this end in a disaster.

“This is actually quite good,” Remy says, amazingly.

I whip my head around to look at him. “You like it?”

He seems to be equally surprised. “You don’t?”

“No, I do. I discovered them a while ago and have been following them since. I love their mix of rock and soft metal.”

“That’s what I like, too,” Remy says.

My mouth drops open. “You like this type of music?”

Instead of insulted, he just looks… amused. “What? Did you think I would only listen to pop music?”

“No, more like classic music,” I admit.

Remy blinks at me before a grin spreads across his face. It’s the first time I have seen him smile! “To be fair, I do play the piano.”

“See!” I return the grin and bump my shoulder against his side. Standing so close to him now makes me aware of how tall he actually is.

I don’t know what it is, the atmosphere of the club, the music, but something seems to be different about Remy. It’s like he is having fun! As if in retaliation, he bumps into my side gently. “You just knew, huh?”

Goddess! Is he fucking flirting? Is this flirting? I feel like I am about to hyperventilate. This is the first time anyone has flirted with me, and I have no idea how to act.

Marise, help me!

What? How? This is so easy! Just go with the flow.

Ugh, wolves! Should have known better than to expect her help. She will just tell me to trust my instincts, completely oblivious to the fact that I don’t have any!

The crowd around us gets livelier when the lead guitarist pulls off his shirt and throws it into the audience.

Someone pushes against me with so much force that it makes me stumble.

Remy catches me, one of his hands on my shoulders, the other on my waist. His touch feels so warm.

I know I should draw back to save my dignity and to protect myself from possible disappointment, but I can only raise my head and look up at him, right into his dark brown eyes.

“I am so confused,” he mutters, his hand suddenly moving up my neck to my face. “I just don’t get it. But you…” His voice trails off.

“But I?” I push, staring up at him.

“You do something to me,” he admits.

His touch feels warm against my skin. I could swear there are tingles. But it’s hard to tell with the room being so warm, the crowd around us, and the room vibrating due to the loud music. Remy looks a little surprised, too.

Did he notice?

On the stage, the band is playing their most popular song, with the lead guitarist adding more fan service by humping his guitar again, and KiZ’s raspy voice echoing through the club.

The crowd around us goes wild, bodies pushing against me, but I couldn’t care less.

All I care about is that Remy still hasn’t let go of me.

It’s like no one can touch us at this moment, as if it’s only the two of us, completely alone.

I stretch slightly to meet Remy halfway, his hand firmly on the back of my head as I claim his lips.

Butterflies seem to flutter in my chest. I can’t believe this! Is this really happening?

It is!

Goddess, it is!

I feel another push, my body pressing against Remy’s, and I can only think how perfectly I fit in his arms. There is a slight electrified feeling on my lips.

Tingles again? Are these tingles from the bond?

Before I can even grasp what’s going on and dive deeper into this feeling, someone crashes into us full force.

It’s a tall guy, completely drunk, emptying half of his drink over Remy’s arm and basically crashing into him. “Sorry,” he slurs.

Something changes in Remy’s expression, as if he is waking up from a dream. His eyes widen, his whole body flinching in what looks like pain. He presses his hand against his forehead and eyes. He pushes the guy off him, his breath going rigid, and then just like that, he dashes outside.

What are you doing? Go after him! Marise yells

She is right! Something is wrong. I could swear I can feel my chest hurt, and my breath going shorter – a foreign feeling that seems like it doesn’t belong to me.

“Kat,” Ayden calls out before I can follow Remy outside.

“Not now, Ayden!”

“I know,” he yells. “Just… I think he heard us.”

“What?”

“I think during the gala, he heard us talking about him. I thought you should know.”

His words make me pause in horror. Does that mean Remy heard my outburst? Oh fuck! I said so many mean things about him, and I didn’t even mean them! The one time I badmouth someone, and it had to be my mate overhearing me!

“I don’t think he is angry with you,” Ayden exclaims, his voice loud so that I can hear him through the music.

“I think it’s the push he needed. I just thought you should know before chasing after him to be able to gauge the situation correctly.

And now go, and claim him, for fuck’s sake. He is clearly into you!”

I nod at my friend before finally running outside.

I am scared Remy will be nowhere to be found, that he just ran off and disappeared, and whatever magical moment we shared tonight will be gone and forgotten.

Even the thought of it makes my head spin.

There was a moment, I know I didn’t imagine it.

It started when we picked up Remy, or maybe it started earlier this week when we met for studying, and then continued today, and ended in a kiss.

Please, don’t just leave me hanging again.

I am so distraught, I almost bump into the second warrior who accompanied us. Alpha Sean had him come for extra protection. He is an older, very calm man who looks strong, but also the type of guy you would trust your life with. Someone who remains calm even when things might go awry.

“Miss Katalina,” he says, and then nothing more. Instead, he gestures at the small alley next to the club.

“Thank you,” I whisper.

He looks like he wants to say more, but then shakes his head and just smiles.

I wonder what it was he wanted to tell me, but I am not curious enough to stay.

My longing for Remy is stronger. I almost believe that Remy might have left the alley again or that it’s all a joke, but not a couple of steps in, I can see him leaning against the cold brick wall of the club, hidden in the darkness of the night.

His hand rests against his chest, while he takes short, frantic breaths.

I… I have seen this before with Joel. It was right after he challenged and killed our uncle, and when all the weight of the last years fell off his shoulders, and he was finally rewarded with the pack and reputation he deserved.

He had a panic attack back then. Just the once, but it was enough for me to know how scary it can be for the person living through it.

Taking a careful step closer, I close the gap between Remy and me.

I don’t dare to touch him, not sure how he will react, but I make sure to be close enough to him so that he can spot me.

“Kat—” he tries to say my name, but another shiver shakes his body.

He presses one of his hands against his head now.

“May I touch you?” I ask.

Remy just nods, and I gently put my hand on his chest before taking one of his hands and moving it to where my heart is. “Breathe with me,” I say, keeping my voice low and soothing, and not trying to let my own worry show.

For a moment, my mind goes back to the guy who bumped into us.

Maybe he triggered something in Remy. Maybe the whole situation, the crowd, our proximity got too much for him.

To my relief, Remy follows my lead, his breath still irregular and frantic, but I can see him trying to match my own breathing.

Slowly, very slowly, his hitching breath calms down.

I take the moment to gently massage his shoulders to help him with his headache.

I am sure his issues are all connected somehow.

I don’t know how long we stay like that, but eventually, I can see the fog in Remy’s eyes clear, his breath even again.

“Fuck,” he curses, his expression exhausted.

There is a hint of shame in his eyes, which makes me feel so sad.

Does anyone know he is suffering from these attacks, or does he hide them? Is he usually alone?

“I am sorry,” he mutters.

“Don’t be,” I say. “It’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

“I shouldn’t,” he pauses. “I should be stronger.”

“My brother had one of these too once, and no one would ever call him weak,” I say. I would never blab Joel’s secrets if I weren’t sure he wouldn’t mind, but I know in this scenario he would want to be an example. That’s the man he is, always has been.

Remy looks surprised. He doesn’t say anything more, but there is a broody expression on his face.

“Did you hear us?” I ask quietly. “You did, didn’t you? During the gala.”

Remy’s eyes snap up. “Fuck,” he curses, for the umpteenth time today. He doesn’t look like the type of guy to curse normally. Maybe I should take it as a compliment that he has his guard down so much. “You should know that I overheard.”