Page 73

“What about you, Mackenzie, what have you been up to?” Trey asks as he shoves a chunk of fried chicken into his mouth.

“Yeah, Mack , what have you been up to?” I ask, raising a brow as I sip my second margarita.

He clears his throat. “Just working my life away at the rehab. Same shit I’ve been doing since I fixed your crazy ass.” He nudges me with his elbow and the guys all chuckle .

“You still with that Maggie chick?” Trey asks.

Jordan shakes his head. “Not for a while now.”

“Shit, I’m sorry man,” Trey says. “I thought you guys were gonna get married and do the whole shebang.”

Jordan twists his lips as he shrugs. “It wasn’t meant to be. But it’s cool. I met someone else, and things were great but… I kind of fucked it up.” He pauses for a moment, and I swear I can’t breathe. Is he talking about me or someone else? “Kinda hoping I’ll get another chance.”

His words are careful, and I don’t miss the side glance he gives me or the way he shifts in his seat. Before I can say anything in response, Andre nods at me. “What about you, Brewer?”

“What about me?” I ask as I pick at my nachos. They aren’t as good as Bella’s but they aren’t terrible. Jordan’s words still echo in my head.

Kinda hoping I’ll get another chance.

“Alex?” Jordan’s voice pulls me from my thoughts and I realize I’ve spaced out. “Dre asked you a question.”

“Sorry, brain freeze,” I say, holding my drink up. “What was that?”

“When are you going to settle your ass down like the rest of us?”

I look at the three of them, feeling a strange sense of pride and jealousy. Hudson stares at his chicken.

“I don’t know,” I answer honestly.

“You seeing anyone?” Hudson asks curiously .

I lick my lips, staring at my food.

“I’m sure Alex sees a lot of people, am I right, Alex?” Paul smirks.

His words settle on me. They hit me all the wrong way, but I can’t blame Paul for saying it. That’s how they’ve always known me to be.

“I was. Dated this amazing guy for five months during my recovery. Best fucking five months of my life. Totally could have made an honest man out of me, but… I fucked it up. Haven’t really been able to look at anyone else since. No one is… him . You know?”

I catch Jordan’s sideways glance at me, feel him tense beside me. His fingers brush my thigh but I think it’s just because this table’s so tight and I’m squished between him and Hudson. Both of them are built like fucking brick houses.

The guys all lament their apologies and then the conversation shifts to Austen and Cam and how no one is surprised that they somehow ended up together because they always seemed so “close” and attached at the hip.

Their reactions are a bit of a relief. I wasn’t sure how much they knew, if Austen had told them, but I guess it’s all over his social media, so it’s kind of hard to avoid it. I’m happy for my brother, truly.

He’s different now that he has Cameron. Comfortable. Happy.

When we finally finish catching up, it’s nearing six .

“Should we meet up tomorrow? You know before we all head to the opening?” Hudson asks as we all file outside.

It’s chilly and I, for one, am glad I wore this flannel because it’s keeping me warm.

It might not be my style, but fuck if it isn’t comfortable.

“Yeah, probably not a bad idea. I don’t know if there’s going to be like food food. I know Austen’s got some fancy hors divorce, but—”

The guys groan at my terrible joke but Jordan laughs. Really laughs, and that makes me smile.

“Alright, then it’s settled. Somewhere close to the place, so we don’t have to walk too far,” Trey says, and I notice he’s standing closer to Hudson than he was a moment ago.

“I'll find a place and shoot you the address and time,” I say.

Everyone agrees and queues up their rideshares, heading off since they are all staying in different hotels in the city.

Everyone, except Jordan Mackenzie who is left standing against the front of the cafe with me, the neon lights casting a warm glow on him.

“Where are you staying?” he asks. His tone is casual as he leans against the window, his hands in his jean pockets .

“Couple blocks from here. You?”

“Couple blocks from BrewTech.”

“Cool,” I say.

There’s a tense pause before he looks up at me and time stands still.

“Can I walk you?” he asks.

“Huh?”

He nods towards the sidewalk. “To your hotel, I mean.”

I look between him and the sidewalk, feeling that swirling feeling of hope. I look back at him. He hasn’t changed all that much in appearance. Though, he does look like he’s gained a few pounds, like he hasn’t been hitting the gym as much. It's not a bad look on him, at all.

My gaze trails over him, smirking because he’s wearing my jersey. Aside from the kids, I’ve never seen anyone I know personally wear my number. I’m not sure where he got it, but it doesn’t look bad on him, and neither do his dark jeans and tennis shoes.

It’s a far cry from a polo and khakis, but he looks fine as hell. I take my time appreciating the view. When I meet his gaze, he’s smirking.

“Sure. I’d like that.”

He pushes off the window and joins me. We walk side by side, with a small space between us. It’s starting to get dark, but there are lights and people everywhere. New York may also be a city that never sleeps.

Neither of us says a word. We just walk, and the silence is killing me. But he’s still here.

I can smell his crisp alpine and vetiver scent, and he’s here.

There are so many things I want to say.

But all I say is, “This is me,” as we approach the block where my hotel resides. “Coming up.”

I wait for him to say something. I heard his words at the cafe. He’s been flirting with me the entire night, but now he’s quiet? Now that we’re alone, he wants to stop?

Before I can speak, I feel his hand. He takes mine and laces our fingers together. It’s the smallest gesture, but it speaks louder than his voice ever could.

I stop in the middle of the sidewalk and someone runs into me, nearly knocking me over.

“Watch it, asshole,” they bite out.

“You watch it!” I shout as Jordan pulls me away from them. The motion puts me right up against him, and I stop breathing.

The sounds of live music fill the air, coming from one of the bars nearby, the singer crooning out words about how even a changing night can never change the love between two people. The belligerent passerby is long gone and people move around us, but I don’t move. I can’t .

Because Jordan Mackenzie is holding my hand. On the street. Around a thousand people. I’m still pressed against his body and he isn’t freaking out. He isn’t pushing me away. Hundreds of people have walked by already, and we’re still here, touching each other more than what friends would do.

All at once my heart beats, coming back to life under his amber gaze. I hear those words loud and clear.

I don’t think there’s anything in the world that could change how I feel about Jordan.

Only him.

“Jordan…” I breathe his name as the anxiety kicks in. He looks down at me, licking his lips.

“Alex…”

God, I’ve missed him so fucking much. Not a day has gone by that I haven’t thought about him.

About what I lost.

His words from the cafe reverberate in my brain.

How could I not give him another chance? All I’ve ever wanted was him. All I’m ever going to want is him. If this year has shown me anything, it’s that him in my life is what makes it better.

My heart thuds loudly in my chest as I look from him to my hotel. I’m terrified I’m going to screw this up, too, somehow, but I push the thoughts away, and look him in the eyes as I find my courage. “Do you want to walk me up? ”

“Absolutely,” he says, giving my hand a soft squeeze.

He holds my hand the entire way. Through the doors, in the elevator. Down the hall.

His palm against mine is warm and soft and is a victory all its own.

“You, uh… have any plans tomorrow? Before the opening, I mean?” he asks.

I shake my head. “Not really. Just dinner with everyone, apparently.”

He hums as his thumb strokes the side of my hand. I keep waiting for him to drop it. To remember we’re in public and people can see us, but he doesn’t.

“I heard about this donut shop that is supposed to be amazing. They pile on the toppings, and their pink sprinkle donut is supposed to be the best in the city,” he says humorously.

“Is it now?” I ask.

“We should check it out.”

I don’t miss his emphasis on the word we.

“We should.”

When we arrive at my door, I let go of his hand to open my door with my keycard, but I stop and look at him. Memories flash in my brain of all the moments we’ve been here, standing in front of a hotel room. And here we are, yet again.

“I could go for a killer donut,” I say with a smile. “Especially with extra pink sprinkles. "

“Meet you outside here at nine am?”

“Sounds good,” I say.

He smiles. “See you tomorrow, Alex.”

And for the first time in a year, I look forward to tomorrow.