Page 29 of Heartbreak Honey

Before

Sitting at the small table in their hotel room, Skyler grew restless. His fingers itched to fidget with something but couldn’t, because Trevor was holding his left hand steady as he painted Skyler’s nails lime green while the right hand dried. Skyler smiled at Trevor’s precision. He’d gotten so much better at this since the first time.

Skyler had been nervous when he’d first asked Trevor if it would be weird to paint his nails. But Trevor hadn’t even blinked before he said, “Not at all. If you want to, then you should.”

They’d gone to the store that same day and Skyler bought a bottle of black nail polish. He’d kind of wanted a brighter color, but black seemed safer.

Trevor had insisted on painting them for him, which resulted in more polish on Skyler’s fingers than his nails, but it made his heart so warm to be cared for in that way that he’d asked Trevor to do it the next time too. Eventually, he’d stopped needing to ask. Trevor now offered whenever he noticed the polish chipping. He’d even started picking up new colors for him.

Skyler was brave enough for the brighter colors now. Because Trevor made him brave. Trevor loved him in a way that made him feel free to be absolutely himself, gave him room to figure out who it was he wanted to be.

When Trevor finished and let Skyler hold his hands up to look, warning him to be careful not to smudge, Skyler grinned. Lime green looked good on him.

“What are you doing?” Skyler asked, jerking his hand away when the makeup artist reached for it.

“I was told I need to remove this.” She gestured at his green nails, and he frowned.

The band was getting ready for an interview on Midnight Mania to talk about their new album and how the tour was going. Jermaine, Oli, and Noah had already been styled and had left to hang out in the greenroom, but Trevor had waited for Skyler after he was done.

“What do you mean?” Trevor said, stepping closer. “Who said that?”

The woman didn’t need to answer. Maggie.

She hadn’t said anything to Skyler when he’d started painting his nails black for concerts, but this was the first TV interview he’d done it for, and with a bright color too.

The woman sighed and addressed Skyler again. “Look, I’m sorry sweetie, but I’m only trying to do my job.”

“This is dumb,” Trevor argued. “I’m going to find Maggie and tell her to fuck off.”

Skyler shook his head. He loved how Trevor always wanted to protect him, but he didn’t need him to fight his battles for him. And he wasn’t sure if this was a battle worth fighting. It was only nail polish. It didn’t matter, really. “No, it’s fine. She can take it off.”

“Sky—” Trevor started, but Skyler shook his head again.

“It’s not a big deal.”

Trevor looked like he wanted to argue some more. “Are you sure?”

“Mm-hmm,” he said. But looking down at his hands after the woman finished removing the polish, he felt a bit empty. He’d grown so confident with wearing painted nails, and now it was like having that confidence stripped away.

Trevor wrapped an arm around his side as they left the room together, the tattoo of the house on his inner bicep pressed against the door you couldn’t see on Skyler’s ribs. “You’re still gorgeous, you know. And I’ll paint them for you again when we get back.”

The interview was pretty typical. Skyler tried not to sulk during it, but Trevor could obviously tell he was still upset because he kept trying to make Skyler laugh. Ruffling his hair and pinching his side and pulling funny faces.

When the interviewer ran out of questions about their new album—the pride in Trevor’s voice was evident as he”d talked about how much they’d all contributed to it—Skyler thought they were going to wrap it up.

But then the guy said, “So boys. Your fans are dying to know what each of you look for in a girl. Let’s start with the young heartthrob over there.”

“Me?” Skyler asked, realizing the interviewer was looking right at him. “Um. Kindness, definitely.”

Oli snorted and Trevor reached across Skyler to whack him on the chest.

“Anything else?” the interviewer asked.

His eyes flitted to Trevor before he answered. “Someone I can be silly with, someone who I can talk to about anything. If they care about me and they’re not afraid to show me how they feel, that’s all that matters, right?” He felt Trevor’s thigh pressing slightly into his, and he grinned. “And blond hair and blue eyes couldn’t hurt either.”

The interviewer laughed, satisfied like that last bit was what he”d wanted to hear all along. Like the fans were only hoping to learn Skyler’s physical preferences so they’d know if they fit them. Like they weren’t concerned with any of the things that were actually important to him.

But it didn’t matter anyway. He wasn’t looking for anyone. He’d already found him.

Skyler didn’t realize he’d screwed up until three days later when he was called into a private meeting with Maggie.

“It’s recently come to my attention,” she said, leaning against the edge of a desk and looking down at him where he sat in an uncomfortable chair, “that you haven’t had adequate media training. You may not realize it, but whenever you’re on camera, you’re giving the public the opportunity to analyze your every word and move. You need to make sure you’re only giving them exactly what you want them to know and nothing more.”

“I thought I was supposed to be myself,” he said.

“Yes. Well. You are, but only your public self.”

“Is there a difference?”

She gave him a derisive look. “We’re going to watch this video of your last interview so I can show you where you made mistakes. That way you’ll be able to do better next time.”

Skyler frowned. He felt like he was back in school, being scolded in the principal’s office—except that had never happened to him because he’d always been a model student.

As they watched the footage from Midnight Mania, she pointed out all the instances when Trevor touched him unnecessarily, and he wondered why Trevor wasn’t in here getting this lecture too. Not that he wanted Trevor to get in trouble. When they got to the part where the interviewer asked Skyler what he looked for in a girl, he knew before Maggie could say it that this answer was where he really messed up.

“Don’t think that fans aren’t picking up on every moment your eyes go to Trevor. And your face is giving away too much. You look like someone who is already in love, rather than someone describing what he’d like to find in a girl.”

“I can’t control my face,” he said. And apparently Trevor couldn’t control his either. Skyler hadn’t realized it during the interview, but now watching it back, he could see the fondness all over Trevor’s face as Skyler described him.

“Unfortunately, you’ll need to learn how to,” Maggie told him. “As much as we’ve tried to keep the focus off your and Trevor’s relationship, your fans are talking about it more than ever. With interviews like this one, you’re giving them all the fuel they need. But it’s important that we do everything we can to discourage this speculation.” She gave him a sharp look. “I think it would be best if you two no longer sat next to each other during interviews.”

“Is that really—”

“And,” she cut him off, “we’d like you to be seen out in public with a young, up-and-coming model. The publicity will be good for both of you.”

Skyler gripped the arm of his chair so hard his knuckles turned white. He didn’t understand what was happening. He knew he and Trevor weren’t supposed to talk about their relationship because their management and the label wanted to keep the focus on the whole band and their music. But they were on their second tour. The band’s popularity and sales had already exceeded everyone’s expectations. What did it matter if some people were talking about him and Trevor now?

“You want me to date someone else?”

He wouldn’t do that. How could she think he would do that?

“No, of course not,” Maggie said with an unconcerned wave of her hand. “All you have to do is go out to lunch with her and be photographed. The public will draw their own conclusions. I promise this will be good for your image. Half the teenage girls in the world already want you. They’re going to go crazy wondering if you’re dating this girl, and it’s only going to make them want you more.”

He didn’t understand the logic of that, but he asked warily, “What if no one photographs us?”

“Don’t worry. We’ll make sure the paparazzi know where you’ll be.”

This was crazy.

Yet when Maggie said, “You care about the band, don’t you? This will be great publicity,” Skyler found himself agreeing to it. Because of course he cared about the band.

It wasn’t until he was being ushered out of her office with a patronizing pat on the back that he realized why she’d brought him here alone. If Trevor had been here, he would have said no. He would’ve yelled and fought her on it. He would have somehow stopped this from happening.

But it was going to be okay. If all it would take was Skyler going out to lunch with someone to get management off their backs, then he could do it. It wasn’t that big of a deal.