Page 65 of Guarded Knight

Because I can keep her body whole and away from danger but not her spirit. I can’t give her the joy she deserves. I’m shadows and scar tissue, and she should never have to carry that weight.

So why does it feel like I just handed her over to a version of myself that doesn’t get what it wants? What the hell am I going to do now? Grow closer to her over the next week or so while I try to eject Cameron from her life and then go back to being empty again?

That is going to fucking sting.

She’s talking now. Low, familiar, but edged with the low hum of something still unresolved. Or maybe I’m projecting.

She chats about how the café only bakes cinnamon rolls on Fridays and how the town smells like Starlight Canyon.

Then, her phone buzzes, and she flinches.

Every inch of my skin sears. Cameron?

She glances up at me with wide eyes before slowing pulling her phone from her purse.

As soon as she sees the screen, her tension melts away. She beams, showing me her cell. “Look what Poppy sent.”

It’s a photo of Xander, flat on his back, lipstick all over his face and eyebrows drawn halfway to his hairline with the caption:Frida Khalo.

Exhausted single dad energy radiates from the screen.

She considers the photo again. “He looks like a drag queen. Though I guess that fancy new school of theirs has a good art teacher.” She snorts.

Her laugh cracks open something in my chest.

Over the years, I missed that sound. And now that I’ve got it again, right here, right beside me, I want to drag it inside my rib cage and lock the damn door.

And maybe if I sayfriendenough times, I’ll stop wanting to be anything else.

We’re half a block from her apartment, where I parked. A light is on two floors above. Guess Freya’s all moved back in.

Anton’s truck is parked near Grenvista Trail, his silhouette leaning against the hood, arms folded. Even in the glow of the streetlights, his posture screams vigilance.

Lara notices him, too. “Looks like Anton’s on duty.”

Her tone is casual, but I catch the edge in it. She’s tired of being watched.

Anton straightens up as we approach. “Everything good?”

“Just had a drink.” I shrug. “We needed to talk.”

He nods, one of those quiet, supportive nods, in a way that says he’s proud of me, like I finally took care of business. As if that’s what I did. We settled our problems out loud, but it doesn’t feel that way inside. I am anything but settled now that she’s my friend again. It’s only opened up a torrent of activity rushing toward making her more.

Anton points up to the apartment. “I swept the apartment before leaving Freya there. And I left your things in your room, Lara.”

Lara shifts her weight, arms crossing over her chest. “Thanks. Appreciate that.”

I wanted her to stay at Monarch Hills. Badly. Forever even. At least while I have to stay there and fulfill this standstill assignment.

But when we chatted this morning, she left me with no choice. Freya was getting grief from Kevin about staying with us, and Lara isn’t leaving her best friend in the apartment alone.

At least she offered the couch again.

And today I’ve eased up on Freya being a suspect.

With all my research today, and even with the help of GhostEye, I haven’t been able to connect Freya to Cameron or find one good reason Freya would want to intimidate Lara on his behalf. I only find the opposite really.

Years of supporting each other as friends.