Page 116 of Guarded Knight

“You don’t need to hide your wounds from me, G.”

“I know. But it’s bad timing. I don’t want you thinking you have a man down. Not when… tomorrow…”

She inches closer, tiny legs wrapping around my waist, and she lays her head on my chest. “Can’t we all be both strong and weak at the same time?”

I place my hand on the back of her head, relishing the sensation of her cheek on my skin, the trust she has in me, the outlook she brings to my life.

Her disease is an ugly curse, and yet somehow, casts a spell of optimism over her.

“I have to believe you’re right.” I kiss the top of her head and lift her chin. “You’re proof that broken and beautiful can exist in the same body. You are absolutely perfect to me, Firefly.”

She threads her fingers through my hair. “So why can’t you be my perfect contradiction?”

Her words gut me, because I want to be. For her. For us. But with Kevin circling and the gala tomorrow, there’s no room for contradiction. There’s no room for the man with blind spots.

She rolls her lips, thoughts spiraling behind her eyes that sparkle bright in a sliver of moonlight. “Did something happen with Xander?”

“He just asked yes or no,” I admit.

Her gaze sharpens. “And what did you say?”

“Yes.” I gaze into her eyes and see all that hope and need to tell her everything.

She deserves every chance to live wide open, to chase joy, to never feel chained by me. I can’t let my yes become the thing that clips her wings.

“But if it’s a yes for you, promise me you’ll never stay if it feels heavy… if you want something else… if…”

I’m not worth it.

“We can be there for each other.” Her eyebrows furrow, and her gaze is distant. “You’ll have it worse than me.”

I slide my fingers around the base of her skull. “Every moment with you, every single one of them, will be my honor to have. I want this. You. Us. I’m not unsure.” But I am afraid. Losing her would be the death of me. “I’ve known you and your wounds since you were walking around in pigtails.I know you.But I worry you’re clinging to an old version of me. All I’m saying is don’t stay. Don’t stay if there’s ever any doubt.”

“Gabriel—”

She wants to reassure me, but I cut her off. “Promise you won’t. I need to know I won’t steal a single second from you. I don’t want you to spare my feelings. I will always…”

…love you.

I don’t finish. I can’t put freedom to leave and those three words in the same breath—it feels manipulative.

Her eyes sparkle with the knowing that’s always there. “I love you, too.”

The words land right under the ribs. A hit I didn’t see coming.

My love for her has been there forever, rooted so deep it’s fused into everything.

Every part of me wants to say it back. But when I do, it’ll stand on its own—a vow, not a plea. If I say it now, it could become a chain, keeping her here even if she doesn’t want to stay.

But she reads my silence as rejection. “I didn’t… forget it.”

I tip up her chin. “I’m not going to forget it.”

“I wasn’t trying to pressure you into saying it.”

“I know.” I grab the sides of her face and swipe my thumb across her lip. “Don’t back down from it.”

Hearing her say she loves me feels like the one thing I’ve been starving for my whole damn life.