Page 50 of Guarded Knight

Fuck me.

I probably have bags and bloodshot eyes from coughing so much yesterday, and he looks like temptation incarnate.

He scrambles to his feet, sweeping a mug of coffee up with him. I work hard not to sneak a peek below that tight waistline of his.

“Did you sleep?” he asks. “I didn’t hear any movement after like, seven-thirty, eight.”

I don’t answer, still trying to get over the long shape under the gray fabric. “Did you stay out here all night?”

He doesn’t have to answer. Of course he did. He’d never leave his post. And yet, even though I know it’s his duty to keep me safe, he promised Xander, I appreciate it this time in a way I haven’t before.

Maybe because of the smoke bomb.

Maybe because of the ab show and morning bulge program.

“Yeah, I slept. More than I thought possible, given the day I had.”

Relief sweeps across his features.

“Is everyone downstairs?”

“Freya’s already gone with Anton to the Monarch Hills offices to work for the morning.” He scratches the back of his thick, tanned neck. “She said you two have to finish planning the donor event next week, but I hoped you could join my dad’s birthdaycookout? Might take your mind off things. Shay is coming with Logan…”

I cut him off with the biggest yes ever. “Um, you think I’d say no to a Mendez barbecue?”

“We don’t have the mariachi band for this one… but Dad made his magic sauce.”

This is perfect timing. I could use some fun. A real distraction. Not like the one gone wrong at the bar. “I’d love that. I just have a seating chart to do and a few emails this morning.”

Gosh, it would be amazing to see Shay and Logan from Starlight Canyon. People fromhome.And to be immersed in a gathering of people where I won’t have time to think about myself. Yesterday was crazy. I need anything and everything to take my mind off it until it’s sorted.

The bigifof Cameron following me here to Echo Valley has finally been answered, and the smoke bomb and note? Is he actually going to try to hurt me? Until yesterday, I held on to hope that fear was his main objective. He wanted to scare me into taking his calls and hearing him out like he’s asked for so many times after screwing me over and lying through his teeth.

But that note seethed with a jealousy I didn’t know he had in him. The kind that says if I can’t have her, no one else can.

Before now, I didn’t want Gabriel and Anton to have to set a trap and catch Cameron in the act of something illegal just to get him behind bars. I’d hoped they’d do it in a more aboveboard way like finding out he broke in back in Santa Fe.

I just want him gone now.

Some of my hair has stuck to my lips and cheek. Gabriel smooths it away, tucking the blonde strands over my shoulder.

“I was worried about you last night. You sure you’re up for it?”

He holds me in that same gaze as at the doctor’s office yesterday. It was both heart-bursting and heart-wrenching to hear he thought I deserved more than him. To hear he didn’t think he was enough… that he still doesn’t think it. I hate that for him with an intensity that twists my very own soul because, after all, I did always think ours were connected.

And now that he’s said he doesn’t know how to be my friend… where does that leave us?

“Yeah, I’m fine. My chest hurts, but I’m better than I thought I’d be.”

His shoulders drop. “Good. Let me get you a drink and breakfast. I asked Dad to bring over drink options for you. Anton and I pretty much have water, coffee, beer and tequila.”

“I’ll have what you’re having,” I joke.

He offers a crooked smile and sweeps his fingers along mine as if he might grab them and tug me along behind him but he doesn’t. It’s a momentary linger but electric all the same, and when he lets my fingertips fall, I want to reach out for more.

He tilts his head in a playful way that reminds me of sixteen-year-old Gabriel. So attentive. So crushworthy.

So out of reach.