Page 42 of Going Overboard

I wake to a gentle shake at my shoulder, a soft but persistent nudge that pulls me from my sleep – well, what little I was getting.

But it’s not him, it’s Kelsey, and seeing her reminds me of where I am, why I’m here, the whole messy situation I have found myself in.

Can I just go back to sleep, please? I can’t face another crisis.

‘Shit, what’s wrong?’ I whisper urgently, my heart pounding in that way it does when someone wakes you up in the middle of the night. I feel all woozy.

‘It’s nothing bad,’ she reassures me quickly, her voice purposefully soothing. ‘Someone is here to see you and I didn’t think you would want to wait until morning.’

I sit up, groggy, my eyes still sore from crying, giving them a moment or two to adjust to the darkness. I see a shadowy figure standing at the end of my bed, its familiar outline, and yet somehow I would probably be more equipped for dealing with him if he were Nosferatu, not Brody.

‘Brody?’ I blurt, my voice catching in my throat.

‘Hi,’ he replies simply.

Kelsey glances between the two of us, a smile gracing her lips that somehow manages to be smug, satisfied and knackered all at once.

‘I’ll leave you two to it,’ she tells us.

‘No, Kelsey, where are you going?’ I ask. ‘You’re getting married tomorrow, you need to sleep, this is your room. Don’t go anywhere. We can leave, let you sleep…’

‘I’m going to sleep in Neil’s room,’ she says with a smile and a bat of her hand. ‘Screw silly tradition. We’ve got good men – both of us – we shouldn’t spend a minute apart, especially now.’

Kelsey leans over and kisses my cheek.

‘You’ve got this,’ she whispers into my ear before disappearing out the door, leaving Brody alone in the dark.

‘Mind if I sit?’ Brody asks.

‘Go for it,’ I reply, sitting more upright, making sure there’s a space next to me on the bed.

He sits down, the mattress dipping under his weight, and for a moment there’s nothing but silence. One of us needs to say something, but neither of us knows who should go first. Then, breaking the tension, we both speak at once.

‘I’m sorry,’ we say simultaneously. Then we both laugh and suddenly everything feels easier.

‘No,’ I say, turning to face him. ‘You don’t have anything to apologise for.

I do. But you have to believe me, I had no idea it was Nikki I was talking to that day.

We were in cubicles, in the toilets, and I heard her crying, and I honestly didn’t know she was dating you. I didn’t even know you existed. ’

I look down, twisting the corner of the blanket between my fingers, because I always fidget when I’m nervous. But it’s now or never, I need to let him know how I really feel. The whole truth, no staging.

‘I don’t know, maybe I’m supposed to say that I wouldn’t have told her to dump you if I had known she was dating you, but that’s not true. I would’ve said it with even more certainty, because she’s not right for you, Brody. I am.’

I’m not sure I intended to say that last part, it just slipped out with the rest. It’s true though.

‘I mean… if you want me, that is.’

I started out so strong but now I’m panicking again. Perhaps I shouldn’t have said that.

Brody smiles, and the second I see his dimples I know it’s all going to be okay.

‘Whether you knew or not, I really don’t care,’ he tells me.

‘You did me a favour. Nikki and I weren’t right for each other.

Not even close. I’m sorry for storming off earlier.

People were watching, and I didn’t want to cause a scene – just in case there were any Italian cricket fans around.

I went for a run to clear my head, came back to the room thinking maybe you’d be there… but you weren’t.’

His tone shifts slightly. I think he was worried that I was avoiding him, all while I was worrying that he was avoiding me.

‘I wasn’t,’ I reassure him. ‘I was looking for you. I was worried you might have believed Nikki, that I told the press about your break-up…’

‘I know you didn’t say anything to the press,’ he says, taking my hand in his. ‘It was Nikki. She was always trying to raise my profile – but really, it was hers she wanted to boost.’

He places his free hand on my face and looks deep into my eyes .

‘This is new to me,’ he admits, actually sounding a little bit nervous.

‘It’s new to me too, pretending to be with someone, we were never going to get it right,’ I reply.

‘No,’ he says, shaking his head lightly. ‘Feeling this way about someone. I’ve never felt like this before.’

‘Neither have I,’ I admit.

Whatever this is, it’s something special. I don’t think either of us can deny that any more.

‘So,’ I start, my voice barely above a whisper. ‘What happens now?’

‘I guess we just start again,’ he says. ‘From square one – the real square one, not the fake one. No secrets. No stories. No staging. Just you and me, making it up as we go along – or not, technically.’

I laugh and it’s the wild kind that bubbles up from a mixture of relief and happiness.

‘Let’s just give the old-fashioned way a go,’ he suggests, stroking my cheek. ‘No pressure. Let’s just see how it goes?’

‘I’d really like that,’ I say.

I yawn, not because I’m bored, but because with things between us back on the right track, I finally feel like I might be able to sleep.

Brody leans back on the bed, arms open wide, an invitation that I can’t resist.

‘Come here,’ he says softly.

I don’t need asking twice. I place my head on his chest, snuggling up to him, the slow steady rhythm of his heartbeat making me feel even more sleepy.

‘This is nice,’ I murmur sleepily, allowing myself to sink into his embrace even more.

He kisses the top of my head .

‘It really is,’ he replies. ‘Get some sleep, you sound shattered. I’ll be right here in the morning.’

And, safe in the knowledge that he will be, I allow my eyes to get heavier, to allow myself to fall asleep in his arms. Because I just know that while I’m here, nothing bad can happen to me.