Page 42 of Beautiful Trauma
“Everything will be okay, Geoff.” I offered him my brightest smile, hoping it would ease the worry I saw on his face. “Let’s meet for lunch next week. How’s Tuesday?”
“Perfect,” he said, sounding mollified. “Gyro Palace?”
“I’ll be there.”
Geoff released his seat belt then reached for me. “Love you, H.”
I returned his hug, squeezing him tight. “I love you too.”
I pulled back, ruffled his hair, then got out of the car. I waved at him then strolled down the sidewalk toward Ezra’s condo building. My phone vibrated with an incoming text, and I pulled it out of my pocket.
Just waiting for the check, then I’ll be on my way. Shouldn’t be much longer.
I must not have been paying attention to where I was going, because I stepped into the path of a pedestrian walking toward me. The impact was hard enough to make me stagger back a few steps.
“I’m so sorry,” a man with a deep, British voice said. He’d grabbed my shoulders to prevent me from tumbling. “Are you okay?”
“I’m the sorry one,” I said, lifting my head up, up, and up until I looked into the tall man’s startling blue eyes. He had to have been at least six and a half feet tall, and his shoulders were broad enough to block the sun. “I should’ve been paying attention to where I was going.”
“Even so, you’re the one who took the brunt of the collision. Are you okay?”
“Yeah,” I said, waving off his concern. “Thanks, though.”
“Have a good night then,” the stranger said before he walked away.
I shook my head in disbelief. “You too,” I called over my shoulder. The guy raised his hand to acknowledge me but kept walking. I continued on my way to Ezra’s, stopping only to exchange pleasantries with one of the concierges who knew me by name.
It was my turn to pick a movie, and I’d chosenMy Cousin Vinny. Knowing it could be a while before Ezra got home, I hurried into the bathroom and took a shower. Ezra stocked the bathroom with the products I used, including the lemon-scented soap I preferred. I also had a few drawers where more and more of my things had started to wind up. I refused to think of the significance of Ezra supplying my soap and making space for my stuff because it could give me a false sense of security about our relationship. We’d made no plans for a future together; we’d chosen to focus on the present and all the joy we discovered in each other. I ignored the frizzle of doubt that sometimes crept in when I least expected it. I blamed Geoff’s unwarranted concern for it resurfacing while I was alone in Ezra’s condo.
After a quick shower, I towel-dried my hair and body then wrapped the super-soft towel around my waist and headed into Ezra’s bedroom. I stopped midway to the dresser when I realized I wasn’t alone. Ezra lay in the center of his bed with his hands tucked under his head.
“Hello, Henry.”
HENRY’S BEAUTIFUL SMILE DOMINATED MYattention until a droplet of water fell from his damp hair and landed on his shoulder. I couldn’t tear my eyes away from the drop’s journey as it slowly slid down Henry’s pec then his obliques, which grew tighter each week from his dedication in the gym and yoga withBrad. It was silly to envy a bead of water for touching a man I’d come to think of as mine. The droplet’s time with him would be short-lived as demonstrated when it was absorbed by the plush towel wrapped around Henry’s waist. Me? I got to have him for as long as he wanted me. Somehow, this guileless young man had found a way to scale the walls I’d built up in recent years. What started as ball-gripping lust had become something so much more meaningful than I’d predicted or thought myself capable of.
“You shouldn’t use that voice, Ezra.” Arousal had turned his fresh-from-the-shower pink flush to a deeper hue. God, he was so responsive and delicious. I couldn’t wait to taste him.
“What voice?” I asked innocently.
Henry narrowed his eyes and took a few steps toward the bed but never came close enough for me to reach him.Wise man.“The same one you use when you’re ready to fuck. You say ‘Hello, Henry’ but I hear ‘Drop the towel and straddle my face.’”
“Is that so?”
“You know what you do to me, Ezra. You play dirty, and it’s not going to work tonight,” Henry replied stubbornly. “I’ve been looking forward to watching this movie with you all week.”
The truth was our simple movie dates meant more to me than any extravagant trip or date I’d ever gone on. What started as a need for secrecy turned out to be the most precious time I’d ever spent with a man. Friday nights were about so much more than movies, popcorn, and a night of uninterrupted sex. We talked and teased, and although it was obvious both of us still harbored painful secrets, we learned so much about each other. Henry was enthralled by my traveling stories, which made me want to show him the world. I was fascinated to hear about the people who’d become his chosen family. I learned that Henry and Jess first met at a support group for abandoned kids, and I better understood why Jess was so protective of Henry and insistent on paying her own way instead of relying on others. Henry shared fragments of his strict upbringing and events that led him to the doors of Ryan’s Place, but I could tell he held back the most painful parts, and that was okay with me. He’d get there when he was ready. I tucked away every kernel of information I gleaned from him more vigorously than we consumed the kernels of perfectly popped and generously buttered popcorn.
What followed our movies was something I could only describe as spectacular. Henry, with his wide-eyed, almost-innocence, reached something deep inside me I didn’t even know existed. It extended beyond my need to nurture and take care of him; it allowed me to accept his thoughtful gestures in return. I didn’t shy away when he took my foot in his hands and began massaging it while we relaxed in my bathtub and talked about the week we’d had. I didn’t discourage his attempts to make blueberry crepes for me one Saturday morning because his eagerness to pamper me warmed my heart. Henry’s crestfallen face when they turned out less than picture-perfect kicked in my protective instincts, and I would’ve eaten every single one even if they’d been horrible. Luckily, they were delicious even if they didn’t look that great.
“I’m not trying to distract you from the movie, Henry.”
“You’re not?”
“I’m not naked, am I?” I asked.
Henry raked his eyes over my bare chest and sweatpants hanging low on my hips. “You might as well be. Seeing the definition in your pelvis makes me crazy, Ezra; you know this.”
“I do,” I agreed, lowering my hand and tracing the indentation between hip and groin. “Would you like me to put on a shirt? Are you worried I will distract you from Vinny?”