Page 40 of Beautiful Trauma
I always slept over and lingered at his home until it was time for my shift at Mamma Maria’s on Saturday. Saying goodbye to Ezra and knowing I might not see him again for another six days got harder every week.
Picking up on my disappointment, Ezra had quickly explained that he couldn’t keep putting his parents off when they invited him out. They were starting to get suspicious, and it would be better to have dinner with them so they could see he was doing just fine. Ezra had called it proof of life or something like that. This was news to me because Ezra hadn’t told me he’d turned down invitations from anyone to be with me. I was excited that our nights meant as much to him as they did me, but I didn’t want him jeopardizing his relationships with people who were important to him, especially his parents. As much as I wanted to believe I wasn’t a temporary phase in Ezra’s life, I couldn’t allow myself to believe I was anything more to him. It would hurt too much when we endedthis.
Who else had Ezra turned down? How long would he be willing to continue living separate lives like this? There was the Ezra he showed to the world and the one he reserved only for me. The idea of losing our special bond made my chest tighten and my stomach ache, so I reminded myself to cherish the memories we made and be grateful for whatever time we had left together.
I’d injected false cheer into my voice and told Ezra that one Friday apart wouldn’t kill us. I suggested getting together for a few hours the following morning because I didn’t have to be at work until two in the afternoon. Ezra quickly clarified he wasn’t canceling our plans; he was only delaying them a few hours. Then he suggested I meet Geoff for dinner because he didn’t like the idea of me feeling lonely.
You’re all the sweet and salty I need,I’d replied to Ezra’s text.
Have fun with Geoff. I’ll see you in a few hours.Ezra had added a few kissy lips which I had sent back to him.
Ezra’s parents weren’t the only suspicious ones. I’d turned Geoff down enough times that he had threatened to find me and kidnap me if I told him no again. He was stunned when I invited him to dinner, but there was no mistaking the happiness in his voice. Taking the time to soothe ruffled feathers was good for both Ezra and me.
“Dayum,” Geoff exclaimed, pulling my attention to him. I was so lost in thought I hadn’t heard him arrive. “I honestly didn’t recognize you at first, H.” He flopped down in the chair and stared at me with wide eyes and a slack mouth.
I looked down at my T-shirt and jeans—things I’d worn to meet him more times than I could count. “What are you talking about?”
Regaining his composure, Geoff smirked and said, “I’m not talking about your clothes, Henry. It’s everything else.”
I rolled my eyes and shook my head. “Same haircut; same me.”
“It’s not your physical appearance, although your shoulders do look broader. Maybe that’s because you’re sitting up taller. You look…” Geoff’s voiced trailed off while he searched for the right words to say, or so it seemed to me anyway. “You look more put together, confident, and in control. I haven’t seen you since early July and Labor Day weekend is around the corner. What’ve you been up to the past six or seven weeks? You’re never available to hang.” Geoff’s eyes widened. “Maybe I should askwhoyou’re doing instead of what.”
“Don’t be crude, G,” I said, feeling my cheeks turn pink.
“Hey, guys, welcome to Dante’s Bistro,” a perky waitress said when she arrived at our table. “My name is Shelley, and I’ll be taking care of you tonight. Is this your first time here?”
“Yes,” Geoff said at the same time as I said, “No.” I felt Geoff’s stare but ignored him to focus on the daily food and drink specials Shelley rattled off.
“I’ll have the bean with bacon soup with a grilled ham and swiss panini and water to drink,” I told her.
“With lemon or naked?” she asked me.
“Without lemon, please.” I couldn’t think of a response with the word naked in it that didn’t sound suggestive or conjure boner-inducing images of Ezra.
“I’ll have the same thing as my friend, Shelley, but I’ll take sweet tea with lemon instead of water.”
“All right, guys,” she said, picking up the menus. “I’ll enter your orders then bring your drinks out.”
“Thanks,” I said, dreading when she left because I knew Geoff was going to bombard me with questions.
“Who is he?” Geoff asked.
“Who?” I asked, looking around the room.
“Ha ha ha. Very funny. Henry, I love you, but I doubt you discovered this upscale bistro on your own.” A playful smile tugged at Geoff’s lips, but his words struck my heart like a sharp barb. He must’ve realized he’d hurt my feelings because all humor leached from Geoff’s face, and he reached across the table, resting his hand over mine. “Henry, I didn’t mean it to sound like you were some loser with bad taste in restaurants. I was focused more on the affordability than your taste in fine cuisine.”
“It’s okay, Geoff. It’s true I wouldn’t have discovered this place without a recommendation from a friend,” I said, remembering the first time I tasted Dante’s chicken noodle soup when Ezra had sent it to my apartment after confronting me. Eating at the restaurant reminded me of the shift in our relationship, and it was a special treat I permitted myself once a week. Even though I experienced it alone, the memory of Ezra’s thoughtfulness was always there to keep my company.
“Friend? Why are you hiding the fact that you’re dating someone? Are you ashamed? Oh.Oh.It’shim.”
“Him?” I asked, wishing Geoff had spotted a friend in the crowd.
“The professor. You’re dating your professor,” he said too loud for my liking.
Jessie knew the truth about my relationship with Ezra, but only because we lived together, and any food-related gifts he’d surprised me with during the week included enough for her too. If she happened to be on tour, I saved the leftovers for lunch the next day. Jessie never pressed me for information because she could see I was happy. As much as Geoff meant to me, I hadn’t planned to tell him about Ezra. I didn’t want other people’s judgement to taint what Ezra and I had together.
“Could you be any louder? I don’t think the table in the back heard you,” I hissed.