Page 82 of All I Have Left

GRAYSON

M y nerves reach an all-time high when we get to The Point. I check to make sure the ring is in my pocket, and then help Ethan with the equipment.

Everything kind of passes in a blur because I can’t focus. I keep going over and over what I want to say to her and still have no plan.

We play two sets before Ethan yanks me aside. “You still doing it tonight?”

“That’s the plan.” I smile with a hint of nerves. “After this song?”

“Yeah, that works. You got the ring?”

I check my pocket again. “Yep.”

“Okay.” He pats his hands to my chest. “Don’t be nervous. She’ll say yes.”

It took me a long time to think about what song to play before I asked her. If I was a songwriter, I probably would have written something, but I’m not, so I chose something I could play on the piano for her while Ethan plays the guitar.

I chose a song she loves, “Hallelujah” by Jeff Buckley.

We play another song, and then I turn to Evie who’s standing near the stage. “Sit with me,” I say into the microphone, patting the bench.

The crowd of some four hundred people scream. They probably know what I’m doing. Or maybe they have no idea but by the blush to Evie’s cheeks as she sits next to me, I think she knows I’m about to do something.

And then I begin to play the slow ballad. It’s a long song, longer than I initially thought when I started practicing it, but it’s perfect for her.

When the guitar fades, it just me on the piano. I tip my head back and belt out the chorus.

Evie cries what I think are happy tears, resting her head on my shoulder.

When the song ends, there’s a moment of silence before everyone claps, but that one silent moment is one I’ll hold with me forever—Evie staring at me with all the love and adoration I could ever imagine.

And then comes the proposal. I know what I planned to do, hopefully know what she’ll say, but it still doesn’t make it any less nerve-wracking. What do you say to the woman who holds your heart and soul in the palm of their hand?

The “marry me” speech ranks up there with what you say when they tell you they love you, or they’re pregnant. They’ll remember everything said. Everything .

I know this because my mom can repeat word for word what my dad said to her. And though I’m not sure how, considering all the screaming, Frankie remembers every word Ethan said to her. It’s a moment I know I can’t fuck up. So to say there is a lot riding on my proposal is a fucking understatement.

I stand, as does Evie, and I walk over to the microphone where we’re going to do a duet. I hesitate once we’re standing there, only to have Ethan shout from behind, “Do it!”

By the look on Evie’s face right now, he just gave it away. She smiles.

Shit. No holding back now .

I wrap my arms around her shoulders from behind and press my chest into her back, holding the microphone to my lips near her ear. “They’re gonna hear what I have to say…” I raise an eyebrow to the screaming crowd. “You okay with that?”

Evie isn’t one for public attention, but she’s giggling so much she can barely keep herself contained.

I start swaying to the beat Ethan begins on his acoustic guitar beside me, a continuation of “Hallelujah.” Evie follows my lead, swaying with me.

Reaching around in front of her, I clasp her hand in mine, twisting around to face her, and slowly drop down on one knee, the crowd screaming in response. I dig around in my pocket. “Uh, one second. I can’t find the ring,” I tease.

Ethan laughs into the microphone, continuing with the slow beat behind us. “Dude!”

Everyone laughs, but it’s Evie, in front of me who gasps loudly and puts her other hand over her mouth. “Oh my—”

“You knew this was coming.” I shake my head, presenting the ring to her. “Just… let me do this, please.”

Tears roll down her cheeks and I see the girl who sat beside my bed for forty-two days straight. “You don’t have to.”

“I want to,” I say, giving her a wink. “Today needs a better meaning than a day we want to forget.”

There’s a lot of awws coming from the crowd, but it’s Evie’s face I’m focused on.

We went the whole day, the morning, therapy, dinner, all of it without acknowledging what this day really meant to us.

A year ago, it was the end in many ways.

I died that day. For a moment. And now, today, we’re getting another chance at forever.

Holding the ring in my left hand, the mic in the other, I turn to the crowd and chuckle. “Now what should I say?”

They laugh, Josh says something inappropriate to the left of the stage, as does Ethan, but Evie reaches for her own microphone next to her. “The Grayson Gomez I know…” She lets out a slow whistle, winking. “He always knows what to say. ”

“Well.” I let out a breathy laugh, drawing it out longer than it needs to be. “You got me there. I have one question really. No speech.”

“Yeah?” She quirks an eyebrow at me, shifting her weight to the right with her hand on her hip.

I nod, drawing it out for the fun of it. “Now what?”

She smiles, remembering when I said that line last. “You know what happens now.”

“I have an idea.” I take the ring from the box and hold it over the finger it will stay on for the rest of her life.

“These words are just words, but then again, they’re not words at all.

They’re memories for you.” It’s then my fucking voice shakes.

With a deep breath, the anxiety passes and I get out the words, “What I say is important to you. I know that. But sometimes, simplicity is just as good.”

Evie grins, tears falling down her flushed cheeks.

“So—” I pause, for the effect and then look up at her. “Marry me?”

Evie’s eyes break from mine, to the ring, and then back. “As if there ever was a doubt.”

I stand, place the ring on her finger and bring the microphone to my lips. “You can’t take it back now. They all know.”

She snorts. “I’d never take it back.”

We do our duet together and it’s the perfect song if you ask me. “We Owned The Night” by Lady Antebellum. We do own tonight, and every night after this.

I pull Evie behind the stage after the song.

It reminds me of the night I came back and she didn’t know what to say to me when she saw me again. She fidgets, her eyes on the ring. “Are you sure about this?”

I lean in, my mouth near her ear. “I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t.”

Her eyes find mine, her arms sliding over my chest and around my shoulders. My breath hitches, reality setting in. “This is crazy,” she whispers .

“What?”

“That you gave the worst day of our life a new meaning.”

My jaw tightens, my weight shifting as I back her against the stage risers.

“I’ve lived and felt alive in ways I never thought possible, and all those moments have happened with you.

” The bass vibrates against the metal and it pulses between us.

I cup her cheeks and hold her face in between my hands.

“We deserve a beautiful life together and I’m going to give it to you. ”

Pressing my lips to hers, I promise without words that no matter what, I’m going to make good on this one.

I have a tattoo on my arm. Seven matches, all burning.

The last one, a pile of ash. I don’t know why I chose them, but the idea remains the same.

We meet matches in our lives. People who come and go.

But there’s always one that burns brighter than the rest and refuses to go out.

No matter how hard the wind blows, the flame remains.

Evie is the one burning inside me—resilient, strong, steady—and she’s going to be my wife.