Page 30 of A Certain Step (Midnights at Pemberley #1)

ETHAN

T he early morning with Willa flew by too soon for his liking, but it dragged afterward.

He was glad the lobby in his apartment was empty because he could steal a quick kiss from her before they went their separate ways. They’d gotten ready together, fed Tulip, and left the house.

It had been perfect.

Annoyingly, training at the gym passed slower than usual, and so did the remaining hours at home, where he had no idea what to do with himself after his post-workout shower.

He’d gone to the highest-rated florist shop nearby and ordered a lilac-mix bouquet, thankful the flowers were now in bloom and scheduled delivery to the theatre two hours before their call time.

It’d be there when Willa arrived, and even though they were meant to keep things clandestine at work, this was a small, subtle way for him to congratulate her debut.

He would’ve done it sooner if yesterday hadn’t been so hectic.

Now that he was set to see Willa again, Ethan was buzzing with serotonin. He stood outside the Blazing Salmon, leaning against red brick walls with one foot kicked up. He spotted her at a distance, skin glowing with the sunlight and her long hair flowing down in its natural wavy form.

He reminded himself not to kiss her, to lean in only for a quick hug, and not to linger no matter how badly he wanted to.

Ethan didn’t always get recognized on the street.

The perks of an intensely bustling city meant that people were either glued to their phones, absorbed in their own conversations, or focused solely on where they needed to go.

If anything, recognition often occurred near the theatre, mostly on quieter afternoons.

Sometimes at Amanda’s Coffee, more than anywhere else. Still, he shouldn’t take the risk.

His breath harnessed in his throat as she got closer, and he caught her beaming smile in full effect. She had on a pair of light-wash ripped jeans, white sneakers, and a black, short-sleeve crop top with her bag slung across her chest.

Willa could wear a burlap potato sack, and he’d probably still fawn over her.

He outstretched his arm, somewhat grateful for the bag’s intrusion in their embrace. She wrapped her arms around his frame briefly before letting go and giving him a massive, toothy grin. “Guess who did her laundry and folded everything back into its place. Honestly, real proud of myself there.”

He swung the restaurant door toward them and stepped aside to let her in first. “That’s way more than what I accomplished. I fell asleep on the couch for two hours.”

“Mate—how?” Mate . Sometimes, he forgot how British Willa could be. He loved it.

He bounced his shoulders. “Because naps rule?”

“Yeah, like twenty minutes maybe, but two bloody hours? That’s mad.”

The restaurant’s front desk host showed up to her podium and broke their conversation. “Hello. Table for two?” she asked .

They both confirmed.

“Booth or bar?”

Ethan and Willa looked at each other, generally preferring a bar in such cases to not wait as long, but a booth could be more private, better for the conversations they’d want to have.

“Booth,” he answered for them.

The host took two menus from the stack in front of her and motioned for them to follow. “The server will be with you soon,” she noted, leaving them the menus.

They took their seats, somewhat secluded but near four teenagers who might’ve been ditching school and an older couple on the other side of them. They generally stuck to the same things on the menu, so neither of them looked at it.

“I need to get it on record that this isn’t an official first date,” he started in a whisper, trying to judge her reaction.

“I didn’t assume it was,” she responded casually.

He kicked her foot gently at the bottom of the table. “Right, but I want you to know that I’m thinking about it. There’s a place near my parents’ cabin where I grew up, and I want to take you there for the official first one.”

She smiled a little wickedly. “Is that where you take all your paramours, Ethan Everett?”

He rolled his eyes, taking note of the way she said paramours, mocking his use of it in the show. “I’ve never taken anyone there, which is why I want to take you.”

“You had to go and make it sweet? Dammit, go on then—tell me the story,” she declared.

He clicked his tongue. “Not yet.”

She narrowed her eyes. “Well, you’re no fun. Now I’m going to picture all sorts of weird things.”

He laughed louder than he intended to. “Patience is a virtue.”

“No, patience is life’s most enraging plot device. ”

Their waiter came in just in time, took their drink orders as well as food, and left them in comfortable silence. God, he wanted to reach over and hold her hand, but he stopped himself. Someday, he’d be able to do that, and he made a mental vow to himself that he’d never let go.

“It’s taking everything in me not to hold your hand right now,” he whispered.

She smiled amiably at him. “I know, I want you to, but not right now,” she paused for a beat. “There is something I want to ask you, though.”

“What is it?”

The waiter returned with their drinks, Dr. Pepper and water for both. She took a quick sip before speaking. “I gave you some hefty details about my exes, but all you’ve ever told me about Michelle is that you were long-distance for a couple of years. Why did you two break up?”

He swallowed a lump in his throat, gulped down some water, then squared himself.

He looked around the restaurant, taking in the noise of their surroundings, determining what he could say aloud.

Surely, these people didn’t even know him.

There was no need for him to be paranoid, but he wanted to respect her wishes, just in case. He lowered his voice.

“I was at a rough spot when I met her. Detective Vice had been canceled, and my agent didn’t have any leads.

I’d also been super drained. It was a brief period where everything in my career felt grim.

So, while we were dating, she was there for me and understood me because we were both in similar boats.

Conveniently, a month later, we both booked separate gigs.

That’s when I did the run at West End. While I was there, she was filming a show in Vancouver.

We’d been together for almost a year at that point, and long-distance was going fine.

She visited once. I went to see her after my run ended.

But then she cheated on me with her co-star. ”

Willa’s jaw dropped.

He continued. “She told me about it, so I sort of took her honesty as genuine regret. That’s when I was cast in Fired Up, and I went to film on location in Vancouver, so we got to physically be together for a while.

She seemed remorseful, so we kept things going.

But as my project wrapped, she cheated again with another co-star, and that time, when she told me, she ended things because she wanted to be with him. ”

“Are you kidding me?”

“Nope,” he said, leaning back in his seat and taking the Dr. Pepper in his hand.

Fury filled her eyes. “Ethan, tell me you’re joking right now.”

“Want me to lie to you?”

Her cheeks went fiery red, the blush and natural anger blending to a raging hue. He hated it. “She cheated on you again after you took her back? With another co-star? On the same show?”

“She was in a bad place, too. I—”

Willa cut him off. “Don’t you dare defend her. Once, fine, maybe you could’ve used that reasoning, but twice? She made a choice, and it was a really shitty one. And on you, of all people? God, I hope I never work with her.”

The waiter came by with their food and extra spicy mayo for Willa. She stared at it. “I’m so furious I don’t know how to eat.”

Great, now look what you’ve done. You’ve made her angry with your sob story. “Wills, look at me.”

She looked up at him, chopsticks propped up in her hand like some sort of weapon.

“I’m not hung up on it. Did it make me more skeptical and distrustful? Yes. But frankly, that’s exactly why I had no interest in anyone else until you. And in that regard, I trust you fully. Now, please take the first bite so I don’t feel like I’ve ruined our day. ”

She shook her head, shut her eyes for a beat, then reached for the grilled appetizer. “I’m still mad,” she stated, popping it into her mouth aggressively and then covering it with her hand to chew.

“Welcome to the club. If I ever see your ex anywhere near me, I’m punching his veneered teeth out of his mouth.”

Her eyes widened. She swallowed the piece she’d been chewing and shrugged.

“Go for it. Just don’t get caught. We don’t need you getting arrested then going from Broadway’s darling to Broadway’s bad boy…

” Her thoughts trailed to a place that brought on a mischievous smile.

“Although, you know what, I’d still dig Broadway’s bad boy, too.

Go forth. You have permission to defend my honor. ”

He made a bowing gesture with his hands. “Your wish is my command.”

She reached for another specialty roll and stopped before putting it inside her mouth. “But in all seriousness. I really am angry. And I’m sorry. You didn’t deserve that.”

“Thanks,” he said, unsure how else to respond. They ate the rest of their food during a brief silence before changing the conversation to ranking the spicy mayo at all their favorite Japanese restaurants.

His dressing room had been fully open when Willa strode inside and closed the door behind her. Her eyes flickered even from afar. A reaction, he hoped, was from the flowers. Ethan stood up from the couch, dropping his Switch on the small table.

She flung herself into his arms, full force, holding him tightly with her arms encircled around his neck. He inhaled the delicious notes of her p erfume, savoring the feel of her so close to him. “What’s this for?” he mused in a low whisper.

Willa faced him then, her one hand traveling through his hair while another came to rest against his chest. He burned white hot where she touched him. “You had to know how much those flowers would mean to me. What the hell am I going to do with you, Ethan? When did you even have the time?”

He held her hand against his lips and placed a kiss on her wrist. Another on the tip of her nose.

One more on her forehead. He returned his mouth to hers, tracing her soft, sweet lips with languid brushes.

“Sometime in between my nap and meeting you in the afternoon,” he answered.

“I’ll get you flowers every day if it means you’ll charge into my dressing room like this. ”

“Christ, have you always been this romantic, or did playing Darcy somehow alter your brain chemistry?”

He released a closed-mouth laugh. “That’s all you, beautiful.

You’re the one who’s bringing all this out of me.

” If she hadn’t decided to keep their relationship a secret, he’d have confessed every one of his feelings.

He wasn’t testing the waters, even though they’d decided to try, he knew where he stood.

He loved Willa more than anything in the world, but he understood that she wasn’t ready for that confession yet.

She sighed with deep contentment, then sprung herself into his chest again. He squeezed her close, trailing his fingers along her back. They stayed that way for a minute or two, rocking back and forth against each other in a languid, slow reprieve.

“I don’t know what to say.” She glided her fingers against his cheekbones.

“But…my heart feels like it could erupt, and I’m trying really hard not to cry right now because thank you simply doesn’t suffice.

I know they’re just flowers, but it means everything to know you heard me—that you’ve always heard me. ”

“And I always will,” he promised.

She reached down to the silver watch on his wrist and checked the time. “I h ave ten minutes before I need to start hair and makeup.”

He beelined to the door, locked it, and hurried toward her lips.

Ethan kissed her deeply, drinking in the giggle that cascaded out of her. Willa swung her arm against his neck, her hands knotting in his hair. She met his lips with equal fervor, identical desperation, tugging and pulling so exquisitely he could swear he was dreaming.