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It wasincrediblysexy.
Looking over, I noticed his eyes wandering up and down my body, and my breath hitched. He licked his lower lip and pulled it between his teeth, biting it as his eyes lingered on my legs. I shifted uncomfortably. As with most things lately, I felt divided. Part of me loved his eyes on me. I loved the hungry look in his eyes, and I didn’t ever want him to look at me any other way.
The other part of me remembered Damian from that very morning, and I felt disturbed to be standing with another guy and feeling such desire for him, too. I felt like I had no control over myself. The feminist in me wanted to say fuck it and accept my sexuality and own it, but years of growing up in the conservative Midwest with their oppressive views on sex made me feel ashamed of it.
It would be nice to be able to make up my mind on literallyanything.
I cleared my throat, and it was like I’d thrown cold water on him. His eyes snapped back up to mine, and he gave a rough shake of his head to clear what I could only assume were lecherous thoughts.
“You okay over there?” I asked, using humor to deflect my own naughty thoughts.
“Yeah, sorry. I uh…” His eyes wandered again. “I don’t know what I was expecting, but… Wow.”
I chuckled. “Thanks. I work out,” I said in a deep voice, mimicking a macho body builder.
“Yeah, I can see that. Your clothing doesn’t do you justice. That baggy ass uniform sure as fuck doesn’t. Hell, I think your arms are bigger than mine.”
I laughed at his joke and flexed my arms. “Welcome to the gun show.” Joking aside, that was one thing I was proud of. I had actual biceps. They weren’t ripped like Damian’s had felt or like Asher’s clearly were, but they were large, and when I flexed, you could plainly see the definition all over my biceps, triceps, and shoulders. When relaxed, however, they had sexy curves to them to show the obvious work I’d done without losing the feminine look I liked.
Asher pinched the bridge of his nose as his smile grew. “Oh, God, that was bad. So bad.”
“Had to lighten the mood. I thought your eyeballs might fall out.”
He cleared his throat as I had, a physical action to regain control. “You’re not wrong. I’m pretty sure you havethesexiest legs and ass I’ve ever seen. So thick, so strong. Now all I can think about is wrapping them around my head.”
My smile fell, and I swallowed hard. My heart felt like it was thundering in my chest. My brain irrationally wondered if it was considered cardio for your heart to race like that.
I forced a nervous chuckle and turned back to the elliptical, climbing on. “Uh, thanks.”
“Does that make you uncomfortable?” he asked. “Me telling you what I think of you? To know I want to get you off with my mouth?”
I fought an ache already growing between my legs as I absentmindedly messed with the buttons on the machine. I shrugged as I started moving, enjoying the feeling of being on an elliptical again and not feeling any pain.
“I’ve never been great at taking compliments, and I’mdefinitelynot used to anyone talking to me quite like that. So bluntly. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate them, and what you said was…” I exhaled hard and shook my head. “It was…something. I just have a hard time hearing compliments sometimes. It’s weird.”
He began a slow pace on the elliptical next to me, matching me. “No, I don’t think it’s weird. You’re modest. That’s not a bad thing. In fact, around here, that’s a great quality to have.”
I wasn’t exactly sure how to respond to that, so I just focused on my workout.
“So, what happened with Damian today? I don’t understand,” he said.
“Ha!” I barked out a loud laugh. “You’re not the only one. I’m just as confused. Nothing like that haseverhappened to me.”
“What? Sex? Sexual situations?”
My eyes shot over to him. “What? No. We didnothave sex like everyone is saying. Not ofanykind. Jesus hell. I should beat that boy’s ass again. Also, I’m not a virgin. I don’t have quite the experience you and Damian apparently do, but I’m not a virgin.”
“Then what do you mean?”
I sighed, then immediately sucked in another breath because I was already beginning to feel the workout.
“I’ve always been confident. My entire life. I’ve never felt like Ineededsomeone or like I was at the mercy of someone else. Well, I guess until recently.” I sighed. “Anyway, I wasn’t thinking about that right then. I was overwhelmed. It almost felt like I didn’t know myself. I didn’t know who the hell I was in that moment.”
Asher was quiet for a while, respecting my space.
“What happened? Has something happened to make you lose your confidence?” he said finally.
Sweat was already running down my face, but I forgot to grab a towel. I lifted my shirt to wipe it away from my forehead before it dripped into my eyes, and I heard a sharp intake of breath. I looked over at him, wondering what happened, and I saw his eyes glued to my side.