Page 25

It’s fucking euphoric and hot as hell. Just like every other time.

I’ve yet to return the favor, never actually having touched his dick before.

Something about seeing this huge, strong, confident male on his knees for me, worshipping my dick like it’s the best thing he’s ever had, does it for me every time, but I do feel like shit for having not given him anything in return.

I’m just not there yet, as much as I want him. I’m still so fucking confused.

“Fuck, man, I love it when you suck my cock. So fucking good, Finn. So goddamn good. That’s it.”

He hums under my praise, picking up his pace and sucking harder on every upstroke.

He’s blowing my damn mind. But that’s not where I want to come.

I want to fuck him. I can’t explain it, but I want it more than anything else right now.

I want inside that tight ass of his, I want to claim a part of him like he’s done to me.

“Tell me you brought lube,” I demand, my voice shaky as I do everything I can to hold off my orgasm. I want to fuck his tight ass; I want to bend him over the railing and drive in deep until we’re both a mess.

“Fuck. It’s inside. I can’t wait any longer.”

“Dammit. I want to come with you, Finn, touch yourself.”

He pops off my cock, leaving it slick from his saliva, and stands quickly, claiming my mouth in another soul-searing kiss. Our tongues tangle, my hands gripping the back of his head hard, hauling his body against mine in a desperate attempt to get closer.

“Fuck, I want to fuck you, Finn. I need more.”

“Trust me, this is gonna feel so fucking good.”

Finn pulls back, lines up our dicks, tip to tip, and fists his cock, pulling back the foreskin before moving upward toward mine, enveloping the head of my cock and creating a sheath.

“Ohhh, fuuuuck,” I moan, my knees nearly buckling, as I look down, my jaw goes slack in awe. He jerks us like that, using himself to create this breathtaking feeling for both of us. The suction it creates melts me, all coherent brain function long gone.

“Oh, hell yes. Look at us, Carter. Goddamn, you feel so good.”

“Finn . . . oh my god,” I pant as he wraps his free hand around my neck, continuing his ministrations that are driving us both to the edge.

His chest rises and falls rapidly against my own, his breathing heavy and warm against my face as he brings us closer and closer to release.

Neither of us can take our eyes off of what he’s doing, our cocks suctioned tightly together.

His jaw is slack, as if he’s just as lost to this as I am.

He pumps us, my orgasm right on the cusp, and like he fucking knows it, he squeezes just a bit harder, forcing me over the edge.

“Ohhh, fuuuuuuck, fuuuucck, just like that, yesss.”

“Yeah? You like it? You like how I make you feel?”

“Fuck yeah, I do. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Don’t stop,” I chant.

“That’s it, lover. So good. Let me have it. Come all over us, flood us with your cum.”

I explode. My orgasm pummels through me with the power of a goddamn freight train.

My cum shoots out, filling the sheath he’s created with his foreskin and overflowing between us, coating both of our cocks and Finn’s hand as he continues to stroke us together, my hips gyrating greedily as he fucks us.

Just as it becomes too much, everything too sensitive, Finn comes with a long moan that makes my heart rate pick up.

I can’t look away. Watching our cocks tip to tip, Finn’s jerking, his cum mixing with mine, is the hottest thing I’ve ever seen.

He releases us before collapsing against me, the railing of the stairs supporting us, my hands rubbing up and down the strong muscles of his back.

His body is flush against mine and the way his bare skin feels against me is fucking mind-blowing. We stay like that for several long minutes, catching our breath and letting our heart rates find a non-life-threatening rhythm.

I wrap my arms tightly around his body, letting him sag against me.

“Holy. Shit,” he breathes against my neck.

“Yeah . . . holy shit. You just blew my goddamn mind,” I confess, because it’s the truth. I’ve never come so hard before, never felt anything so intense.

I hold him like that for a few minutes with the stillness of the night surrounding us. It isn’t until the chill of the night mixed with our wet bodies that I start to press against him so that he stands on his own.

“We should get going, we’re gonna freeze or get caught.”

“Wouldn’t want that, now, would we?”

The moment shatters, and my walls slam down hard.

“No. We wouldn’t,” I snap a little harder than necessary.

“Yeah. Figured. Wouldn’t want anyone to get the wrong idea about you. I get it. Been there time and time again.”

His words sting. But I don’t correct him.

He thinks I’m so closed-minded that it would bother me that he’s a man.

But that’s not it at all. Is it different?

Yeah. But that’s not why my heads fucked up over this.

Sure, I don’t want to let my family down, and I know he’s hiding something, but that shit can be dealt with.

It has everything to do with everything he makes me feel.

I can’t give in to that. I can’t lose myself to someone else.

The fact that, despite knowing that something is different when we’re together, I still can’t give him all of me.

I don’t do feelings, and Finn makes me feel fucking everything.

I promised myself a long time ago that I would never let someone have my heart, that I would never get close enough to someone else for them to have the power to destroy me, but here I am. Just stupid enough to fall into bed with the one man who holds all the power to do just that.

Walking back into the house is a silent blur.

Both of us too prideful and cocky to break the thick tension.

But that’s the thing about whatever Finn and I have—even the angry silence between us is comfortable.

There’s still nowhere I’d rather be. How fucked up in the head do I have to be?

I don’t recognize the feelings stirring in my chest, my mind telling me to get the fuck out now, my heart feeling like it’s finally found home.

I don’t do this shit. My head is lost to a million different things, I barely register Finn’s words.

“Want a drink?”

“Nah. I’m gonna go shower,” I reply curtly.

I walk through the house to the bedroom I claimed for myself, heading right to the massive walk-in shower and turning it on hot. My head is spinning, and it feels like I don’t know myself anymore. The only thing that’s certain is I’m never going to be the same after this.