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“I want you to trust me, Carter. I can’t explain this pull to you without sounding like a lunatic. I really am sorry about how I got you here. Just . . . something was telling me to take you away. To escape with you.”

“Damn, you really do sound like a lunatic. Should I be worried about never making it home?”

His eyes twinkle with mirth as he laughs under his breath.

“Don’t give me any ideas, Hayes. Or I’ll run away with you.”

Silence stretches between us as we stand toe-to-toe, sharing air, both of us suspended in unsaid words.

Words that are being held back by fear and the outside world.

I don’t believe in fate or coincidences, but there’s something I can’t explain about why my initial reaction to him running away with me is excitement and not terror.

“Okay,” I tell him, his eyes going wide as they bounce back and forth between my own.

“Okay, what?”

“I’ll put everything aside for the weekend. I’ll try. You aren’t alone in this. I feel it, too, I’m just . . .”

“Scared.”

I release a rough breath.

“Yeah.”

“Don’t be. I’ve got you.”

And fuck if I don’t want to believe him.

Walking around the small town with Finn is as easy as breathing. We fall into step together like two friends who’ve known each other their entire lives. It takes me a beat to remember that I’m far from Aspen Ridge and no one here would know me from the next asshole walking around.

“What do you do for fun? You know, besides prowling a sex club for unsuspecting women?”

“Is this on or off the record?”

The growl that leaves his throat is deep and masculine, and even though I can’t see those icy blue eyes behind his aviators, I know they’d be full of annoyance.

“If you’re not going to try . . . you know what?

Fuck it. Let’s just go.” Finn turns to retreat the way we came, my chest tightening with something that feels a whole helluva lot like panic.

I reach out and grab his arm, pulling him into my space, just a breath apart.

Not an hour ago, I agreed to try this weekend.

I let him see a rare vulnerable part of me and I’m already fucking it up, falling back into my old habits, hiding myself from everyone around me.

“I’ll behave.” Finn’s head cocks to the side as if he doesn’t believe me. “I will, just . . . give me a break here.” My throat cracks as I continue, “This is new for me.”

“Walking around town with someone other than yourself?”

“Fuck, man, you’re really gonna make me say it?”

“Sure as fuck am.”

“Goddamnit, you can’t make anything easy, can you? I’m not open with people. I’ve never been in a relationship. And this is not a relationship, but I don’t go walk around town with someone I’m fucking around with.”

“Never?”

“Never. I don’t want one. I don’t do relationships, full stop.

And I definitely didn’t know I was . . .

” My voice trails off as I run my fingers over the coarse stubble of my face.

I don’t know why I’m opening up, but it’s just so damn easy to talk to him.

And for once, I have someone who seems like they genuinely want to hear what I have to say .

“Into men?” Finn finishes for me, even though I’m still confused as fuck on that one.

“Into men,” I repeat, not hating how it sounds. “I think? I don’t even know. Again, not saying this is a relationship either, it’s not, just feels a bit relationship-y.”

Finn’s lips lift in a smile as he steps into my space, whispering in my ear in that way that he does that drives me crazy, his warm breath scattering goosebumps across my body.

“Lean into it, lover. It might surprise you.”

He pulls back, his hand dragging down the length of my arm until he finds my hand, threading his fingers through mine.

Electricity zips between us, causing my heart to beat rapidly in my chest. I use the fist of my free hand to rub the spot, hoping to relieve this budding feeling.

Finn gives me his signature smirk and pulls me along to continue up the brick street and the rows of shops.

His hand is warm in mine, and just like everything else with this man, he’s given me something I’ve never experienced before. And I don’t hate it.

“You ever had lobster?”

I think back for a moment to all the damn fish I’ve had over my life growing up in Washington, but lobster isn’t something that’s typically caught locally.

“Nah, I don’t think I have, actually.”

“Get ready for it, you’re either gonna hate it or love it. There will be no in-between.”

We weave through tourists and get in line at a shack by the water called When in Maine.

It’s jam-packed with people, at least twenty in front of us, so it must be good.

Everyone seems to be getting the exact same order, though, and after five people walk away with what looks like an overflowing hot dog bun, I look at Finn.

“Lobster rolls. Lobster and mayo on a split-top bun. That’s it. ”

“That’s all they sell?”

“That’s it.”

When we finally get up to the counter, Finn orders our dinner and pays.

We take our lobster rolls and head back to his mega-mansion, finding a spot at the edge of the water, taking seats next to each other in the grass.

We eat in silence, the sun slowly setting behind the cove.

It’s so different here from Aspen Ridge, and I’ve only been here a few hours.

“What’s it like growing up being one of five kids?” Finn asks, breaking the silence that stretches between us.

I crumple up the white paper, tossing it into the to-go bag while thinking over his question.

He’s so goddamn easy to talk to, but it’s hard not to hold back not knowing his true motivations.

This could all be a ruse to get close to me and I’m the desperate asshole that would fuck it all up.

Especially because I want to talk to Finn. I want to open up to him.

Lean into it.

“Chaos mostly. But it was good. I don’t know anything different.”

“Always wanted siblings, so that’s why I ask . . . in case you think it was for other reasons.” And once again, he’s reading my mind.

“You’re an only child?”

“Yeah. Parents wanted to throw everything into one kid and not have to divide their time. Or so they say.”

“Sounds a little lonely, man. Even if it was batshit crazy in my house growing up, I couldn’t imagine it any other way.”

“Yeah, trust me, being an only child isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.

At least it wasn’t for me. There were so many times I wished I had somebody to have my back, be in my corner when I was up against my parents.

It was always two on one, and it was a game I was set up to fail from the very beginning.

Who knows, maybe they wanted it that way. ”

“Nah. It sounds like they love you and wanted to give you the best shot at life and not have to split resources. Shit was hard when we were little. Especially when shit went down with my older brother.”

“What happened?” Finn asks, his voice full of sincerity and genuine curiosity. Truce. There’s a ceasefire in place. I take a steadying breath, keeping my eyes focused on the colors reflecting off the ripples of the ocean.

“He, uh, he was in a relationship for a while, basically my entire childhood, I guess. I can’t really remember back to before Ivy was around. They were together for years, and it was a relationship just like my parents had. So full of love and happiness. Then one day she was just gone.”

“Shit, man, I’m so sorry.”

“She didn’t die; don’t look at me like that.

She just upped and disappeared shortly after she, Sawyer, and Dallas graduated from high school.

No communication, no notice. Just here one day and gone the next.

He fell into a deep depression. My brother Dallas had to step up.

My dad was working crazy long hours at the distillery, Kinsey was still little, and Liam and I were little shit preteenagers.

My mom had her hands full. But Sawyer wouldn’t get out of bed.

He was supposed to go to college, and he postponed a full year.

He didn’t eat. It lasted a long time and it gutted me.

Seeing him find the love of his life, just to lose her. It destroyed him.”

Fuck, I remember seeing my brother laying on his bed staring blankly at the wall. His eyes were devoid of any emotion, like he was completely broken.

Mom was crying again, even though she thought I couldn’t hear in the pantry.

I know it’s because she’s worried about Sawyer.

I don’t understand why he won’t get up. I miss him taking me to Grace Beach and teaching me to surf.

I miss him picking on all of us and driving me around.

Dad really misses him being at the distillery.

I thought I was going to miss him because he was going away to college, but he’s still here, lying in his bed like he always is.

“Sawyer?” I call out as I open his door and walk in.

He’s lying in his bed on his side, hugging his pillow.

He doesn’t look the same as he did before Ivy left a few months ago.

He’s skinny now, his eyes sad and empty, like he’s sick with the flu and it just won’t stop eating him alive.

“I need you to get up, Sawyer. We all miss you, and I want my brother back.”

“I can’t.”

“Why? Tell me why?”

“’Cause my heart is gone, and I don’t know how to function without it.”

“Your heart is beating inside you, Sawyer. She didn’t take it.”

“It’s not the same without her here, kid. You’ll understand someday when someone steals yours.”

“You need to get up, Sawyer.”

“Car, I’m sorry. I can’t do this without her.

She took it when she left me, and I’ll never be whole again.

” His eyes fill with tears as his body shakes with sobs.

I crawl onto the bed with my big brother and hold him, letting him cry and mourn Ivy, all while promising myself that I will never let this happen to me.

No one is taking my heart. I’ll never give anyone this much power to wreck me.