Page 165 of Vying Girls

So yeah, fucking over fighting any day.

Might change things though. I dump some hot chocolate powder into mugs, a teaspoon more than the instructions ask for, and stir them absentmindedly. It’s also been me and Haz in this whole thing. Me, Haz and Tilda. I’ve never shared a girl before, didn’t think I had it in me to be honest, but Tilda seems to slot in perfectly between us.

Will Nic unbalance that? I give a snort to that question, because I suppose she already has. I know what me and Hazbring to Tilda. She tells us often enough what we both do for her. But what does Nic do for her?

It could be more than the two of us put together, more than I can ever imagine. I know dribs and drabs of their history, mostly the bad stuff, but it obviously runs deep. You can’t hate as much as Nic does without once loving just as much. Maybe she’s just the final piece to Tilda’s puzzle.

Happy enough with that conclusion, I lick off the teaspoon before lobbing it into the sink. Above me, Tilda shouts my name.

‘Yeah?’ I call, tipping my head towards the ceiling.

‘Your Nan’s ringing you!’

‘Oh. Could you answer it?’

I don’t hear her reply over the opening of the front door. Haz comes in, her exposed skin dewy with rain. She doesn’t look happy.

‘Didn’t find her then?’

She shakes her head with a disgusted sigh.

‘Nope.’ She pulls her sodden tank hoodie over her head, leaving her in a sports bra. ‘Couldn’t find her tent. But whatever. Let her have another heart attack with no one around.’

I pull the hot chocolates towards me. ‘I mean, you could have spoken to her before going to her hockey coach. Did you want her to get kicked of Varsity? You know she’s obsessed with it.’

Haz sighs again, this one sounding more defeated. ‘Yeah. Maybe I fucked up. But shit, Elly! We’re back fucking here again.’

‘I know. It sucks.’ I shift the mugs in my hands. ‘I gotta run these upstairs. We’re just in my room.’

I leave her to strip off the rest of her wet clothes. Tilda looks up when I return, something in her expression giving me pause.

‘Yeah, she’s just here.’ She hands over the phone.

I press it to my ear with a frown. ‘Hey.’

‘Hiya, love,’ comes Nan’s weary voice, ‘You okay? Look, I’m just up the hospital with your grandad.’

I lower onto the edge of the bed, that familiar sinking feeling pummelling me.

Because it’s always something bad. Always.

‘His bag’s clogged again and they’re saying he’s incredibly dehydrated, since he’s not being drinking with all his incontinence.’

‘But I sent him those hydration jelly things.’

‘I know you did, love. It’s just got that bad. But it’s causing issues with the blockage.’

She stops talking, something in the silence telling me that this isn’t going to be a quick fix like all the other times.

I shift on the bed, feeling Tilda’s arms creep around me, holding all the panic in. ‘So, what’s the plan?’

‘To get him hydrated, to see if that unblocks his bowel. He’s on this ward. Oh, Elly. It’s so busy, no privacy. It’s a general surgery ward but they’re saying he’s too fragile for surgery. They’ve got him on fluids and a tube since he can’t eat.’

‘Shit. Bet he hates that. How’s he doing? How’s he taking it? Is he, you know, alert and stuff?’

‘He’s fed up,’ Nan answers after a pause. I can tell she’s holding something back and not hearing it is worse than whatever it might be.

I glance at the clock, not really seeing it as I say, ‘I’ll jump on the ferry. Might take me a while but I’ll come home as quickly as I can. Are there visiting hours?’