Page 25 of Toni and Addie Go Viral

Toni

Toni was barely awake when she crawled out of bed the next morning.

That was the only excuse she had for looking back at Addie like she was some sort of sleeping princess come to change the ogre’s mood.

Whatever was happening here wasn’t just sex, which was concerning Toni more than a little.

She felt… safe with Addie. They’d gone to dinner and a walk on the beach, of all things, and as dawn threatened, reality hit hard.

Toni was wrestling with how she felt about it, about Addie, about whatever the hell this was.

She’s fucking incredible.

She deserves better than me.

If not for the sex, it would be fine. They’d be at the edge of a great friendship. If not for the talking, it would be fine. They’d be at the edge of an excellent hookup without strings. Combining the two felt dangerous.

I could actually fall for her.

Except Toni didn’t do relationships. I told her that, and she still stayed.

Giving that much power to another person was exactly why her mother was miserable and had been for decades.

It was why Toni had to find a way to provide for Lilian Darbyshire in her onset of memory loss and widowhood.

And unlike her mother, Toni would have no children to save her if she trusted someone.

Not that I’d ask that of a child if I did have one!

Real relationships simply weren’t on the table. Ever. They couldn’t be. Toni wasn’t designed for them, and she had all the proof in the world that love was a lie.

Friends with benefits. That’s all this is.

Still, before she could stop herself, Toni leaned down and kissed Addie, who sleepily murmured, “Not saying no, Professor. Just let me sleep bit more first.”

Toni pressed her lips tightly together to stop a laugh from escaping. How I wish… But stock signings and midday flights were all that Toni had on her schedule today.

“Next time, love.” Toni glanced at the bedside clock.

She was already running late, and she hadn’t showered out of fear of waking Addie.

That could be awkward, and Toni would rather skip that.

This was the problem with the morning after: it was either awkward or Toni had to slip away like a thief who had already stolen the finest jewels.

The idea of seeing Addie again added complications, but they had jokingly—or not?

—discussed a few intimate things to try, and Toni was all for playing teacher to the outspoken gorgeous actor currently curled up in her hotel bed.

If not Toni, Addie would find someone else to satisfy her recently awakened curiosity, and the thought of that made Toni feel like worms were crawling through her belly.

It was just protectiveness, right?

I have no right to be possessive.

Toni brushed the strands of Addie’s hair away from her face and reconsidered waking her to say goodbye. That was absurd, though. They had already been becoming friends. Now they were just friends who had amazingly satisfying sex and—

Emily texted again. So far she had texted no less than four times.

Toni discarded the thought of waking Addie and scrawled a note: You’re amazing. Thank you for everything.

Then she shoved her last-minute items into her carry-on and headed to the door. When she woke with Addie snuggled into her, Toni had legitimately considered blowing off the signings, rescheduling the flight, and taking an extra day in LA.

Completely too far, she told herself as she rolled her bag to the elevator. One night of sex wasn’t reason enough to change her routine. Weekends were author time, and weekdays were teaching time. It was how Toni kept things in order.

Where does Addie fit in?

Toni caught a glimpse of herself in the mirrored elevator walls and realized that it was for the best that she had a friend with the makeup skills she lacked. The last thing she wanted was social media photos where she looked even more exhausted than usual.

As Toni stepped into the hotel lobby, the clickety-clack of Emily’s shoes sounded like a reprimand. Emily came toward her with a travel cup of coffee in an outstretched hand.

“It’s cool enough to drink now,” Emily said. “Possibly cold, in fact.”

Toni took a long sip, swallowed, and glanced at her best friend as Emily took her carry-on from her.

Emily crinkled her face up. “Sweetie, we need to pause in the gift shop.”

“Why?” Toni followed her, sipping her coffee like it was nectar of the gods.

“You smell like sex.”

“I washed up,” Toni sputtered.

Emily muffled a laugh at Toni’s uncharacteristic awkwardness. “I’m glad for you, but I thought maybe we should buy a nice cologne… because I’m guessing you don’t want to walk into the bookstore smelling like—”

“Fine!” Toni marched into the store, feeling like a child caught breaking rules.

After a few minutes, Emily pointed inside a case in the store. “Let’s try that one.”

The woman at the display case held it out, and Toni dutifully sniffed.

“Do we like this scent?” Emily asked. “Or at least tolerate it?”

“Fine.”

Emily handed over a credit card. “And flowers for room—”

“What?” Toni shook her head. “I don’t send flowers, Em.”

Emily signed the credit card slip, spritzed the air around Toni’s hair and neck lightly, and walked out. Toni trailed after her.

“Sweetie, I love you. You know that,” Emily began, her voice dropping into the tone she adopted when cajoling Toni into an interview or other event she knew Toni didn’t want to do. “And I’m pretty sure you are at least slightly aware that women… appreciate your attention.”

“Addie did.” Toni shrugged. “She just wants a friend and a bit of time with someone with experience, and I’m not exactly able to bed-hop these days.

It’s just a situationship, Em. We like each other.

It’s not dating. ” Toni sighed loudly at the blatant look of doubt on her best friend’s face.

“We’re not U-Hauling like every joke about moving in together on the second date. ”

“I’m not saying you should move in with her on the second date, but if you’re a thing—”

“We’re not a thing,” Toni interjected firmly. “Just because I plan to see her again doesn’t mean I’m dating her. We’re becoming closer friends.”

“Friends,” Emily echoed.

“Yep. We email. Now we’ll be sometimes naked, but we’re just friends,” Toni said firmly. No one, even her best friend in the world, needed to know that Toni could develop feelings for Addie if she slowed down long enough.

Not going to happen.

Just to be sure of it, Toni decided she’d swing by the care facility to see her mother when she arrived back in DC—nothing like a careen through whatever year her mom thought it was to remind her that relationships were a terrible plan.

Toni glanced at Emily. “I left her a note. We’re cool.”

She walked away, rolling her bag behind her until she was outside at the waiting car. Great sex and relaxing conversation was a fine basis for a friendship. Goodness knew that Toni had a few friends who fell in and out of her bed over the years. Surely, one of them was still available.

Maybe that’s what I need, see if Leigh is still around. Or Faith.

But even as she thought it, her stomach turned. She opened her own door and got in the car. She didn’t need to look up an old friend. She had a new friend—one who was a lot of fun in bed and listened when Toni talked. One who shifted like a chameleon on a stage.

Toni’s mind drifted to the second book, and she pulled up a notes app on her phone and started writing down ideas about giving fictional Addie a small romance. That, she could do. She couldn’t give one to the real-life Addie, though.

“Great sex and a muse, too?” Emily teased as she climbed into the car.

Toni flipped her agent off and kept writing.

This was the most she’d written in weeks.

She’d tried—lord, how she’d tried—but her words were as unwilling as her body when she tried exercising the few times she’d been hungover.

Technically, Toni supposed the result was still exercise, but it sure as hell wasn’t the best exercise.

Today, though, she wrote the whole way to the bookstore before looking up when the car stopped in an underground garage.

“She’s good for you,” Emily said. “I’m sending her flowers because of that. If nothing else, either getting laid or a relaxing dinner did you the remarkable favor of unsticking your words. I’m sending the bouquet, not you.”

Toni shot Emily a glare. “Fine. Just don’t say anything sappy.”

“‘Thanks for the orgasms.’” Emily made air quotes. “Or maybe, ‘My agent sends thanks for improving my mood and helping with my deadline.’ Too much?”

The driver coughed in what sounded a lot like a smothered laugh as he got out of the car to open Toni’s door. She was already out the door and scowling back at Emily.

“I like her,” Toni said bluntly. “She’s becoming a good friend. Don’t write anything that suggests otherwise on the card. Nothing sappy. Nothing dismissive. Don’t sign them from me or you. Just… whatever.”

“You could write something,” Emily said. “You are the writer here, after all.”

“No. I don’t send women flowers.”

Then Toni strode off toward the bookstore without waiting for Emily.

Toni wasn’t about to admit that sending flowers sounded nice—or that she could picture Addie’s sound of delight.

She’d never sent flowers or even considered doing that.

It smacked of relationships. Toni looked over when Emily’s telltale clickety-clack heels caught up with her.

“No fucking roses, either. That’s the wrong message.” Toni ignored the quirk of a repressed smile on Emily’s lips. “I mean it. I don’t want to hurt her feelings by sending her the wrong message.”

“And what message would that be?”

Toni jerked open the store’s door and muttered, “That I’m capable of anything other than friendship. You know me, Em. I’m not that sort of woman, and Addie’s pretty amazing. She deserves someone wonderful.”

And I’m not able to be the kind of person she needs, Toni added silently.