Page 37 of The Quarterlands (Dark Water #4)

“Do you like it?” Alex asked anxiously. “I hope you do. I spent ages on it, trying to get it right. In the end, Elsie told me to stop bloody well tinkering with it and just give it to you.”

“Like it? Alex, it’s beautiful.”

There were none of the usual flourishes that he was familiar with in Alex’s work: no flying cars or the quirky visual jokes that made him laugh.

This picture was full of love, both in tone and execution, and completely unironic.

Alex wasn’t trying to be clever, only sincere. A lump rose in his throat.

“I did think about giving Hattie wings but decided against it.” Alex grinned. “Charles helped me choose the frame yesterday when we were out shopping. He hasn’t got a bad eye – for a rower.” He laughed.

Josiah stroked the brushed-silver frame lightly with his fingers. It was perfect, even if Charles had been involved in choosing it.

“I hope you don’t think it’s too sappy, but I wanted it to reflect how I saw your relationship with Peter.

I know I didn’t see you together for long, but you were so relaxed and happy, and I loved the banter you had.

” He gazed at Josiah anxiously. “I hope you don’t mind that I put Peter and Hattie in it. ”

“Why would I mind?” Josiah held it up, unable to take his eyes off it.

“It wasn’t my intention for it to be a sad painting,” Alex explained.

“I wanted it to make you smile whenever you look at it because it brings back happy memories. Peter and Hattie are always a part of you, Joe. That won’t ever change, whatever new things happen in your life, or new people come into it. ”

“I love it,” Josiah whispered .

“Good, because it’s more than just a painting. It’s a message, too, and an important one.”

“A message?”

Alex rested his hand on Josiah’s arm. “The message is, ‘Don’t be lonely,’ Joe.

When I’m gone, and you’re here all by yourself, I want you to know that you aren’t ever really alone.

We’re all here with you, the people you rescued.

You touched our lives and made them better.

Without you…” Alex broke off and looked down, blinking hard.

“When I’m gone, I want you to look at this and remember that.

I made you promise this once before, but I wanted to remind you because it’s important.

Don’t be lonely, Joe. It doesn’t have to be a man, but it could at least be a dog, or you could let your friends into your life more.

Just promise me you won’t be lonely.” He looked up again, his eyes gleaming.

“Thank you. I’ll try,” Josiah said softly.

Alex squeezed his arm. “No, promise me, Joe.”

Josiah remembered the countless evenings he’d returned home late to a cold house and eaten a lukewarm takeaway hachée on the sofa before he’d sleepwalked his way up to bed.

He dreaded being that person again, frozen inside, locked up in all that grief and misery.

He was taken aback by how well Alex knew him, and that he’d been so concerned about him that he’d thought to make this touching gift, with its important message lovingly rendered in every brush stroke.

“I promise,” he said, his voice breaking a little. He didn’t want to be that lost, lonely man again. He wanted more from life than that. The future was in his hands. It was his choice, and this picture would always remind him of that.

“Alex, this really is the most beautiful gift,” he said softly, leaning forward to press a kiss to his cheek. “I’ll treasure it forever. Now, instead of breakfast here, why don’t we go out for brunch? It’s a beautiful day, let’s make the most of it.”

Inspired by Alex’s painting, they drove out into the country. Alex directed him to a restaurant not far from The Orchard where they could sit outside and enjoy a beautiful view over rolling hills.

“I know we don’t have much longer together,” Alex said. “And I want to thank you – for everything. Whichever way the trial goes, I know you’ve done all you can to bring Tyler to justice.”

“I wish I could give you some assurances about the future, about the trial and your life after it.” Josiah sighed. “I wish that was in my power.”

“But it isn’t. What you’ve done is give me the time and space to recover, at least a little. I’m not in the bad place I was in a few months ago, and that’s because of you. I know it hasn’t always been easy, but please know that I will always be grateful.”

They decided to take a walk. It was a glorious summer day, the sky a vivid blue above them and the countryside as green and perfect as in Alex’s painting.

As they walked, Alex slipped his hand into his, and Josiah let him because somehow, on this precious, beautiful day, it belonged there.

Alex wasn’t his. Alex might never be his, but right here, right now, they had each other.

He knew he should speak up about what he suspected, but he couldn’t find the words. How could he admit that he’d gone delving into Alex’s life, not to win the case against Tyler but out of sheer curiosity, because being an investigator was who he was and he couldn’t resist a mystery?

Alex had endured years of misery without revealing his secret. Was Josiah going to expose it to daylight after all this time? Throw it at Alex and watch his face fall and his heart break?

Yet with Tyler’s trial looming, he couldn’t in all conscience remain silent, either. It was unlikely Alex’s secret would come up during the trial, but Josiah couldn’t run the risk of going into it with such a massive potential bombshell hanging over them.

Josiah knew himself to be many things, but he wasn’t a coward, either physically or emotionally. He’d put off the moment for as long as he could; it couldn’t wait any longer.

A thought occurred to him on the way home, and he deliberately drove in the direction he’d taken the day before. Beside him, Alex suddenly fell silent as he realised where they were.

“Why are we driving this way?” he asked, gripping the door handle tightly, as if afraid they’d crash.

“Why not? It’s a pretty route. ”

They passed The Dark Horse pub, where a crowd of people were sitting outside, enjoying the sunshine.

“This isn’t the way home,” Alex said, a note of panic in his voice.

“I know.”

Josiah drove on implacably. Had Alex been back here since the crash? He doubted it. It was such a beautiful day that he opened the duck’s roof hatch, and the sun flooded them with warmth. The accident had happened on a day like this, in a duck like this, with the hatch open and happy people inside.

“What are we doing here?” Alex asked urgently. “You know where we are, don’t you?”

“Yes. I know.”

Josiah turned into the lane where the accident had taken place, drove a little way along, and pulled over onto the grass verge. Then he turned to face Alex.

“I know,” he said again. “Alex – I know.”

Alex’s face drained of blood. He sat quite still, staring ahead.

“What do you know?” he whispered.

“I know you weren’t driving the duck when the accident happened,” Josiah said softly.

Alex turned to look at him, and Josiah could see him visibly struggling to suppress a rising tide of alarm.

“Of course I was driving,” he snapped. “There were witnesses. People saw me.”

“They saw you driving away from the pub, but my guess is that around about this precise spot, right here, your mother looked at you, saw the tears streaming down your face, and realised you’d taken croc.

She knew it was too dangerous for you to continue driving and she couldn’t drive because she’d never learned how, so she told you to swap places with Charles. ”

“No. That’s not what happened,” Alex said firmly.

“Yes, it is.”

Josiah took out his holopad and brought up the photos of the wreckage. They hung in the air, visceral and shocking. Alex looked away.

“I had an instinct about it when I first started investigating this case back in October. When we saw that media report about the crash, I knew there was something wrong, but I couldn’t place it at the time.

I finally revisited that instinct, and when I looked at the investigative reports about the accident, I knew something was off; I just wasn’t sure what.

Then I figured it out. You said that when you came to after the crash, you were still in the duck.

You said you pulled yourself out of the wreckage and found your mother and brother on the road.

The thing is…” Josiah paused and glanced at Alex, to find him staring straight ahead, his arms folded across his chest.

“That’s just not possible.” Josiah gestured at one of the holopics showing the wreckage of the duck.

“The front of the duck was all but obliterated by the force of the impact with the trees. Anyone sitting there wouldn’t have been able to climb out afterwards and walk away with just a few cuts and bruises as you did – they’d have been crushed to death.

Charles and your mother were both thrown out through the open roof when the duck tumbled over.

It’s possible the duck landed on top of Charles at least once as it tumbled, although I suspect your mother was thrown clear and killed instantly on impact with the road.

” Josiah continued on relentlessly. “You sustained the fewest injuries because you weren’t driving. You were sitting in the back.”

Alex started shaking. He wrapped his arms around his body and rocked back and forth. “Why would I lie?” he asked, his jaw jutting out defiantly. “Why would I lie, Joe?”

Josiah sighed. “You lied because Charles was taking a banned drug called Flex. I’m not sure how long you’d known about that, but you did know.

Maybe, somehow, the pair of them had drawn you into their inner circle and made you feel part of their world.

The price for that was protecting their secret at all costs. ”

“No.” Alex shook his head vehemently, still refusing to look at the holopics.