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twenty-one

“I said I was gonna help your ass. I never said I was gonna do all the work.” I grumbled, flopping down on the couch. I had just helped Solomon move into his new apartment.

“Ain’t nobody tell you to be the Incredible Hulk. I told you I would grab the other end.”

“Shit, your ass is too busy simpin’ on that damn phone to move shit. It better not be my sister on that fucking line either, or I’m beating both y’all asses.” Of course, his ass waved me off, walking towards the kitchen to grab a drink. I got up to follow him because it was hot as fuck outside, and a nigga needed some water.

“Man, you know I don’t pay your apple head brother any mind. Did you get your calculus homework done? You told me you were going to call me after you finished tutoring that football nigga, but you left my ass hanging.” Solomon spoke on the phone, confirming that he was, in fact, talking to Honesty. I still didn’t understand the dynamic of their relationship because, on the outside, they swore they were just friends, but the chemistry between them said something different.

Whenever you saw one, you likely saw the other, and it seemed that Honesty called on him more than me these days. I can admit that I was jealous in the beginning because I was so used to being her hero and it seemed that she was replacing me with this pretty boy ass nigga.

“Naw, I’m not trying to hear none of that shit. You’re supposed to be focusing on your grades, and that’s it. All that other stuff is extra. All I know is that when those grades come out, they better be straight A’s or Ima be on that ass. You better tell them all about me.” he warned. I couldn’t hear what she was saying on the other end, but their conversation sparked my interest.

Honesty was a sophomore at JAU, and she seemed to be adjusting well. She only lived an hour away so we made sure to visit her whenever we could, and she came down on the weekends often. Yaya thought that was the reason why I had so many cookouts, but in reality, I just enjoyed spending time with my friends and family. The older I got, the more I began to appreciate the simple things in life.

“I took today off so that I could move into my apartment, but I do have a full schedule tomorrow. I already let Jah know that I needed Saturday off, so I’ll be up there to put my eyes on you so I can make sure you aren’t getting into any trouble.” I could hear Honesty giggling in the background. This was the shit I was talking about. They could holler about being best friends all they wanted to, but something didn’t sit right with me. Hell, after all, Yaya started off as one of my best friends, too, and we see how well that worked out.

“Whatever, best friend, you know I’m an angel, so you have nothing to worry about.” Honesty’s voice sounded from the speakerphone. Solomon had his phone down to make him a plate of food.

“Shit, I wouldn’t say all of that. It’s always the innocent, quiet girls who get into the most trouble. I would hate to have to come out there and air that place out.” This motherfucker. I thought to myself.

“No, not at all. When you come down here, we are going to turn up all weekend! It’s homecoming weekend anyways, so you know it’s about to be lit. The only thing I ask is that you don’t have sex with any of my roommates. One of them already hates me. The last thing I need is more drama because you don’t know how to keep your dick in your pants.” Solomon’s face scrunched up in irritation.

“I don’t even like the way you’re trying to handle me right now. You already know how I get down, so your little warning is unnecessary. Plus, if I see something I like, I’m going after it, and you know that. I’m gonna chill, though. You’re the only person that I care about seeing this weekend and the only woman I want to spend time with.” I remember what it was like to be their age. They were young, dumb, and having fun. My only hope is that they were responsible. Honesty had a whole life ahead of her, and I would hate to see her fuck it up over a man.

“Aww, best friend, you love me, don’t you?” Honesty, cooed into the phone.

“I don’t have to dignify that with an answer because you already know what it is. Anyways, your brother is staring a hole in my face, so I’m about to get off this phone. Call me tonight before you go to bed, and I’m not playing with your ass. If I don’t hear from you then I’m gonna blow your phone up and embarrass you in front of whoever the nigga is that you’re entertaining.” Solomon possessed that cool, laid-back demeanor, like my brother Rule. He didn’t yell, but he got his point across.

“I hear you. I’m about to go grab some food with the girls and then slide by the mall for a little bit.”

“Do you need some money? You straight?” Those were my lines, so it was crazy to witness another man taking care of my little sister.

“No, I’m good. Between you, Rule, and Messiah, I won’t need any money for the rest of the semester.” She replied.

“Alright, bet. Enjoy the rest of your night, and don’t forget what I said.”

“I won’t. I love you, best friend, forever, and a day.”

“Forever and a day,” With that, he disconnected the phone before digging into his food. As I looked around the apartment, I held so much pride in my heart. Solomon had been independent from the day that I met him, and his work ethic was unmatched. He’d been wanting to get his own apartment for a long time, but Miyana kept talking him out of it. She didn’t understand that, as a young man, he needed his own space.

I was sure he wanted to invite the honeys over and live a normal life for a young man in his 20s. He already had a car and a good-paying career, so it was only right that I helped him get his first place. When he first told us that he wanted to do tattoos, I will admit that I was skeptical. However, his determination won me over. He started interning at this tattoo shop called Ink’d Out, and the owner quickly took a liking to him.

I’ve seen some of his work, and he’s definitely talented. Now he was one of the top artists at the shop and the youngest too. Yaya and I were both incredibly proud of him. A lot of people who have been through the things that he’s gone through don’t make it out. I’m glad to be able to witness a young black man making a name for himself and building towards the future. That’s the reason why I didn’t mind going all out for him. Solomon had always been humble, never wanting to accept a handout. It took months for him to understand that family helps family. I wasn’t doing this for accolades, nor did I expect anything in return.

Yaya and I agreed to pay his rent for the first six months, even though he put up a fight about it. We wanted to set him up for success and give him the opportunity to stack his bread up. So many families try to put their young people out on the streets early without any fundamentals or any skills. No savings or anything to help them, when things go left. We didn’t play that over here. We wanted to make sure that he had all the tools to succeed. Even if, for some reason, he did fail, we reminded him that we would always be here.

Solomon had a bright future ahead of him, and as long as he kept up his end of the deal, he would never go without anything. I’m all for getting it out of the mud, but our father worked hard so that we wouldn’t have to, and as a result, we will continue to make sure that our children never have to struggle. Our siblings included.

“Can I ask you a question?” It’s something that has been on my mind for a while, but I never spoke on it.

“What’s up?”

“When are you going to tell Honesty that you’re in love with her?” I mean, we joked about it often, but I can see the look in his eyes that he cared about her. It was deeper than friendship, whether he wanted to admit it or not.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Honesty is my best friend, and that’s it.” he brushed me off and continued to eat his food.

“I’ve seen the way that you are around each other, and I don’t believe that for one second.” Silence fell between the two of us, while he continued to eat with his head down. After a few moments, he finally looked back up at me.

“Even if I was in love with her, what good would that do? I don’t have shit to offer a girl like her, so why would I waste my time?” His statement caught me off guard, so I paused for a moment.

“What do you mean by that?” I need clarity because his words didn’t make sense to me.

“I’m going to tell you the same thing I told you when you asked me after graduation. Honesty and I are from two different sides of the tracks. We’ve lived two completely different lives. Honesty needs a clean-cut man who doesn’t have trauma and baggage attached to him. And I need someone who isn’t green to the world that we live in. Honesty believes that everything in the world is good, and you can trust everyone. She doesn’t know what it’s like to wake up with no lights and no food. She’s never had to experience being beaten or put outside in the middle of Winter. Or having to sleep on porches and park benches. She’s never had to hustle to earn money or do things she doesn’t want to do in order to survive.

"I love her for her innocence, and I would never do anything to take that away from her. I’m still trying to get my shit together, and I would never drag anyone else down with me. The bitches I fuck with understand where I came from, and they don’t require much for me. Honesty isn’t like them. Even if she didn’t require much, I would still want to give her the world. I may be young, but I’m wise enough to know that I’m not ready for that type of commitment with anybody. Especially, not someone I love.” Although I did not agree with some of what he spoke, I respected it.

He made some valid points, because Honesty was green to a lot of things. We made it that way because we didn’t want her to experience some of the things that we had gone through growing up. She’s never had to work for a single thing because we handed it to her on a silver platter, and I don’t apologize for that. At the same time, I didn’t like the fact that Solomon talked down on himself. No man is perfect, but if I had to pick anyone for my sister, he would be my top choice.

At least with him, I knew that she would be loved and protected because I see the way that he cares for her now. Whenever she had an issue, he was the first person she ran to. It let me know that she trusted him. I agreed with them both being young, though. This was the time to make mistakes and be young, wild, and carefree. I wanted them both to live their lives, create those experiences, and use those years to grow and learn from.

“I feel what you’re saying, and I respect it. However, you are a good man, Solomon. Don’t ever let anyone tell you any different. You already know I stay strapped and ready when it comes to my family, so the fact that I trust you with my sister should tell you a lot. You have beaten the odds stacked against you, and you’re in the process of creating a good life for yourself. Don’t lose focus of that, and don’t ever doubt your abilities. Every blessing coming your way is because you earned it, and you deserve it.

"We’re not handing you anything because we don’t think that you can do it on our own. I look at this as an investment. I see the greatness inside of you, and I know that one of these days, you’re going to be somebody important. People are going to be requesting you by name soon enough. Things may not have started out perfectly in the beginning, but it’s not always where you start. It’s about what you do after.

"The past is in the past, and you are no longer that person anymore. I’m not going to put pressure on you, but just know that whoever you end up with, they will be lucky. You have rose from the ashes and have come out stronger than ever. Nobody can hold your past against you, nor can they minimize your success. I’m proud of you, man. At your age, the only thing that I had on my mind was fucking bitches and playing in the NBA. This is only the beginning for you, and there’s no limit to what you can accomplish. I know your stubborn ass won’t ask for help, but if you ever need me, I’m always here for you. I don’t care what it is. Do you understand me?”

“Yeah, man, I hear you. I appreciate everything that you’ve done for me. Most niggas would never take in their girl’s siblings the way that you did for us. You could’ve easily allowed us to go into the system, but you stepped up for my sister and I. I’m not really good at expressing my feelings, but I appreciate you being a brother to me and investing in my dreams. My only goal is to be able to pay you back for everything you’ve done for me.” I nodded.

“I don’t need you to pay me back, but when you get rich and famous, don’t forget to shout a nigga out! Oh, and I need a free tattoo.” We both chuckled before slapping hands.

“I gotcha fasho,”

“Alright I’m gonna get it out of here so I can go slide on your sister. She already texted me her lunch order, so I’m about to pick up my baby’s food and see how her day is going.”

“Ol’, simp ass nigga,” he teased.

“I don’t give a fuck about it. She already knows she can get anything for me. Call me sprung, a simp, or whatever else. I will be all of that when it comes to my wife.” Yaya was the only woman in the world who could get me to act this way. The love I had for her could never be duplicated, and I would never deny her anything that she wants in this world.

“Good shit, I’ll be sliding by there later tonight for dinner. Plus, Malea wants me to take her, and her little bald-headed friends to the mall after school.” She was another piece of my heart that could get whatever she wanted. Malea was just as spoiled as all my other sisters. Solomon and Rule also took turns spoiling the fuck out of her too.

Buying Solomon that car was the best thing I’ve ever done because now I don’t have to worry about taking her to the movies or to the mall. That was a torch I would gladly pass on to him.

“Better you than me. I’ll see you later on and make sure you bring your own Tupperware cause you ain’t taking shit out of my house! I love you, man!” I yelled, making my way towards the door.

“Love you, too.” Once I made it to the car, I’ve checked my phone to see if I had any messages. I’ve been making it a point to check on Freedom almost daily, just to make sure he was doing alright. For the most part, he seemed to be in better spirits, but my aunt Faith had been hovering over him like an infant. I couldn’t say that I blamed her because I know if it was my child, I would be just overprotective.

When you’re young, you don’t think about the consequences of your actions because in your mind, you have all the time in the world to make mistakes. That’s not true though. All it takes is one fuck up to end your life or ruin it forever. Freedom was lucky that night, because God truly had his hand over him. I hated that he had to go through something so traumatic in order for him to wake up, but God will get his message across one way or the other.

Yaya’s spoiled butt texted me to ask if I was on my way. I started to pretend like I didn’t know what she was talking about, but one thing I’ve learned about women is that you don’t play with their food. Yaya was working for her cousin until last year. When Janae opened her brow bar, she decided to add a nail station to it as well. The two of them decided to go into business together, and things have been going smoothly so far.

I still couldn’t believe that Janae and Yaya were cousins, but I loved the fact that they were so close. Keso looked out for them the way he promised, although I made it clear that he didn’t need to provide anything for Miyana or her siblings. I appreciated the fact that he wanted to be there for them.

My views concerning Janae have done a complete 360. I realized how easy it was to judge someone based on their past, and who they are. Our friendship has come a long way, although I still ragged on her from time to time. I love the bond that we were forming with one another because I knew that it would be transferred over to our children. I pray that they have the type of relationships that we have now.

Since her order was a pickup, I walked right in and out within minutes. Since I knew she’d be getting off late, I made sure to grab enough food for me and the kids. I still couldn’t believe that I had two kids. Deuce and Cherish were my entire world. I loved watching the relationship between the two of them because Deuce was an amazing big brother. Cherish was growing bigger and bigger by the day, and she was so advanced for her age.

Seeing her crawling across the floor and passing new milestones daily really gave me a sense of purpose. My children motivated me to be better and to never give up. There was once upon a time when all I loved to do was stay out late and kick it, but now I couldn’t wait to come home to snuggle under my family. I used to think that a championship ring and millions of dollars were the end goal for me, but it was them. They were the prize that I received at the end of it all.

“Hey, baby,” Yaya greeted me at the receptionist's desk. Since Janae was out on maternity leave the staff has been pulling extra duties in her absence.

“What’s up, pretty mama? How has your day been today?” I asked, kissing her lips and then placing her food on the counter. Of course, her ass reached for the bags as soon as I sat them down. Greedy ass.

“It’s been good; better now since you brought me some food. My damn stomach was touching my back while I was doing the last girl's nails. I know she heard that shit rumbling.” She told me while scooping a big spoon of rice into her mouth.

“I told you to start packing your lunch, but you’re so damn spoiled, you don’t listen.”

“It’s really not about the food, though. I can easily order my own food; I just like being able to see your face in the middle of the day. When you’re on the road, I don’t get to spend as much time with you, so when you're home, I take advantage of it as much as I can.” The love she had for me radiated in her eyes. She had it just as bad as I did, and there was no shame in it.

“You don’t have to play tricks with me, baby; if you miss me, just say that.” A smirk spread across my face. Opening my mouth for her to feed me. She obliged, adding a few pieces of meat to the spoon.

“I miss you anytime we’re not together. Why the hell did you have to come in here looking so fine, though? I almost had to pop a few bitches at the last shop because you wanted to pull up in your sweatpants. I’m just now getting to know these girls. Don’t have me out here getting active who because you want to be dressed like a slut.” I laughed at her silly ass. According to her, I was out here trying to get chosen. She might as well face the fact that her husband’s fine as hell, and there isn’t a damn thing I can do about it.

“You’re wildin’, shorty. This dick doesn’t get hard for anybody but you. They can look as long as they don’t try to touch the merchandise. Lord knows I don’t need you catching any charges from snatching bitches wigs off. You’re supposed to be turning over a new leaf anyway.” I teased her.

I’m proud to say that it’s been a couple of years since the last time she put her hands on anyone. Truthfully, her anger has gotten better between therapy and life in general. I believe it has mellowed her out. Don’t get me wrong. She had every reason to turn up the way that she did, so I never held it against her. However, I love seeing this side of her even more.

It’s my goal as her husband to make sure that she never feels threatened or insecure about anything in our relationship. She would never have to fight anyone because of me. I’d never do anything to break her heart or embarrass her. She was worth fighting for, and I would spend the rest of my days ensuring that she always felt loved and appreciated.

“When are you taking your lunch break? I’m tryna slide you some of this beef sausage in the breakroom,” I nodded to one of our favorite places. Every now and then, when it’s so slow, I’d come through and break her off with this dope dick in the middle of her work shift. She put up a good front, but she never told my ass no, so I don’t know why she liked to play so much.

“There are too many people in here. Mama and Moe are keeping the kids tonight, so we have the house to ourselves.” She informed me.

She and my mother still maintained a close-knit relationship. Whenever she needed help with the kids or a break, my momma was right there to give it to her. When Yaya became pregnant with Cherish, we were all concerned about her having postpartum, but things have been going smoothly. We made sure understood she wasn’t in this alone. I stood by her side from the beginning of her pregnancy until the very end.

We’d recently put Cherish in daycare, and she’s been doing amazing. Yaya was nervous at first, but the staff sent her hourly pictures and updates on our baby girl. Although, I travel a lot, I try my best to be as present in my family’s life as I possibly can. Deuce knew if he showed his behind, I’d call his little ass on Facetime and set him straight.

My children talked to me every single day, no matter where I was or what I was doing. Nothing or no one would ever be more important to them. We’d recently gone viral because Deuce called me in the middle of a live interview. I didn’t hesitate to stop what we were talking about to see what my son needed from me. He called to say goodnight and to recite our nightly prayers, and I didn’t hesitate to join in. I wanted to be available to them at all times. Now, of course, if I’m on the court, there was an exception. However, I made sure they knew I was never too far away and that they could access me.

“Ohh wee, that means I get to bring out the bag of tricks since I won’t have to share my bed with your worrisome son. Since Cherish was born, Deuce started back sneaking into our room. Of course, Yaya’s soft ass refused to put him out, making our sex schedule more limited than before.

As soon as he’d fall asleep, I put his tail right back into his bed though. The last thing I wanted was a bed full of children. When I come home, all I’m tryna do is slide between the sheets, ass naked, and fuck my wife’s wig off. You can’t do that with kids in the bed.

“Is she picking them up, or do I need to drop them off?” We still lived an hour away, so I needed to know before I went home and got settled.

“I was going to meet her halfway after my shift ended, but if you don’t mind, that would be great.” Yaya batted her eyelashes. She knew I hated for her to drive to Jonah Hills at nighttime.

“I’m going to call her now to see if she wants to meet me halfway. If not, I’ll drive out there. Just make sure you tie that wig down extra tight tonight because I plan on wearing that ass out. My dick has been going through a drought these last few days, so I hope you don’t plan on getting too much sleep tonight,” I warned. I’ve been missing my wife like crazy, and I fully intended to show her just how much.

“Whatever, I’ll see you when I get home. I love you, ‘Siah”

“I love you more, Yaya. Send me a couple of pics when you go on break. I’m tryna see if she missed me as much as I miss her,” I winked.

“Get out, Messiah! With your mannish ass!” She tossed a balled-up napkin at me.

“Hey, a closed mouth doesn’t get fed. I thought it was worth a shot.” I shrugged, jogging back to my car. Life was good, and I could only hope it remained this way. The good days far exceeded the bad, and while it took us a while to get to a place of peace, I wouldn’t trade our journey for anything in the world. Miyana was the missing piece I needed in this world and now we’ve created a family of our own to love and protect. I’m blessed beyond measure, and I’ll never take it for granted.