Page 94 of Steel

“Look,” I said, sighing, “I have to get to work. Enjoy the weekend with your grandson. I’ll see you on Sunday.” I kissed my baby on the cheek. “I love you, Fat Man.”

Without another word, I left out the side gate and headed to my car.

Saturday rolled around quick.

I woke up this morning and cleaned my house, did some grocery shopping, and picked up a few things for our movie night. I took Jaeda with me, and it wasn’t until I’d spent almost six hundred dollars between Home Goods and Walmart did I realize I was doing too damn much.

I wanted to create a memory with my baby girl. I bought a fucking tent to go in my living room and serve as our fort. I got a huge blow-up mattress, blankets, oversized pillows, popcorn buckets, and serving trays, among other things.

Jaeda wasn’t any help.

Actually, she was a lot of help. I told her what I wanted to do, and she was all too happy to help out. She called our mother to clue her in as she kept throwing shit in the cart. My mama had a million questions about what I was doing with Neha. She swore she knew every damn thing.

The problem was, she did. She knew me better than I knew my damn self at times. It didn’t slip past her that I had lingering feelings for my baby mama. She said she saw it in the way I looked at her when I didn’t think anybody else was watching. According to her, Neha watched me the same way.

I didn’t see any evidence of that until last night.

“This looks so good!” Jaeda said excitedly as we stood around my living room, observing our handiwork. “Neha and Nayelli are going to love this.”

“I did this for my daughter.”

She kissed her teeth. “Boy, bye. I see what you’re doing.”

“And what am I doing, Jaeda Janelle?”

“Creating a family moment because you want your family together. You ain’t got to lie, Craig. You ain’t got to lie.”

“Weren’t you and our siblings just telling me not to fall for her again after what she did?”

“That was before I knew why she did what she did. It doesn’t excuse it, but I understand. She was young and afraid. Now she’s older and can own up to her wrongdoings. Y’all are stuck with each other for life. You can’t help who you have feelings for, KD. Bitches fall for ain’t shit niggas all day long that don’t have trauma fueling their decisions. They ain’t shit because they ain’t shit.

“That’s not you or Neha. You two were kids when all this happened. Two kids who probably got too serious, too fast, but it happened. You both made mistakes, and I hate that my niece had to be in the middle of it, but she’s here now. You’re here. Neha’s here. If by some chance you two want to give things a try, I’ll support you. Just make sure it’s because you want it and not because she’s familiar or a missed opportunity.”

I stared at her for a moment. “When did you become the older sibling?”

“You know I’ve always been the one with the most sense.”

I playfully mushed her head, causing her to laugh. Pulling her into my arms, I hugged her tightly.

“Thanks, Jae. I love you, man,”

“I love you too.”

Pulling back, I rubbed her stomach. “I can’t believe my baby is having a baby. Shit is crazy.”

“No, what’s crazy is you and your brothers trying to run my man off. I will never get over the way y’all showed y’all’s ass.”

“First of all, that was Smoke and Deuce. Me and Maceo were chill.”

“You still showed up with them.”

“One band, one sound, baby!”

She rolled her eyes. “Thank God I didn’t marry a punk.”

“We wouldn’t have let that happen. You married a good one. I hate to admit it, but he’s definitely Fat Man’s favorite uncle. I appreciate the time you both spend with him. All the shit you teach him. You are going to be great parents.”

She teared up at that. “You really think so?”