Page 16 of Steel

She nodded. “I’m . . . getting along.”

She was still taking Donna’s death hard. So hard that she’d barely seen KJ in the last six months. I knew it was a painful reminder, and I didn’t try to push her. I simply let her know that whenever she was ready, we’d be there.

“How is KJ?” she asked quietly.

“Growing like a weed. He’s greedy as hell, too, always trying to snatch things from my plate. The boy yells at me if I take too long to come with his food.”

She smiled softly. “Donna was a greedy baby too. I used to have to bird feed her while I ate, or she’d try to flip my plate over.” She shook her head. “I miss her so much.”

“I know, Ms. Anita. I miss her too. I talk to KJ about her all the time. I know he doesn’t understand, but I’ll never let him forget her. I promise that.”

“Thank you.” She looked down for a moment at the bag in her hands. “I um . . . I stopped by to bring him a few things.”

She handed the bag to me, and I went through it to see some clothes, shoes, and a few toys. At the bottom of the bag was a small black box. Pulling it out, I opened it to find a familiar gold necklace with the letter D.

“She loved that chain,” Ms. Anita said. “Her father gave it to her for her thirteenth birthday. She never took it off. I know I should have let them bury her in it . . . She would’ve like that.” She looked down, fighting back her tears. “I figured she’s with her dad now, and KJ should have a piece of her, so I want him to have it.”

I nodded. “I promise, I’ll give it to him when he gets older.”

“Thank you. I’m so sorry I haven’t been there. I just . . . it hurts so fucking bad!”

She broke into tears, and I was instantly on my feet to console her. I couldn’t imagine what she was going through and never wanted to. There couldn’t be any peace in losing a child. I half expected her to hate me for even getting Donna pregnant. We’d had so many conversations with her about our desire to have a child, even in untraditional ways. I thought she would look for someone to blame, but she hadn’t. I was thankful for that because I wasn’t sure I’d be able to take that kind of guilt.

“You don’t have to apologize,” I said, hugging her tightly. “I know you love him. I know you want to spoil him in ways only a grandma can, but you’re hurting. I’m here to support you any way I can, Ms. Anita. I loved Donna. I promised her that ifanything ever happened to her, I’d always take care of you and KJ. I meant that.”

She sniffled. “I know you did, baby.” She pulled away from me and wiped her eyes. “Maybe we can do a video call tonight?”

“We can do that. My sister is watching him until I get off work. I’ll call you before I give him his bath.”

“Okay. Thank you, Kerrion. I know Donna would be happy with how well you’re taking care of him.”

“I hope she would be.”

We shared another hug before she left the office. Just like that, I was feeling worse. I guess today was just set to be mentally taxing on a nigga. I needed a blunt like hell right now, but my kids would be here in an hour. I decided to set my alarm and take a fucking nap. Hopefully, my dreams were better than reality.

“Good job today, y’all,”I said, going around to slap high fives with the kids.

We’d been practicing getting out of holds today. While some of them got a little rough, they were able to pull it together and get back on track. I approached my newest student, Nayelli. Today was her first day, and I could tell she was nervous.

“Good job today, Nayelli,” I said, raising my hand to slap her five.

“Thanks, Mr. K.”

“How was school today?”

“It was okay. My mom came up to the school to fuss at the principal. He gave me a buddy, so nobody’s been bothering me.”

“That’s good.”

“It’s embarrassing,” she said, hanging her head. “I hate it here, and I miss my old friends.”

“I’m sure they miss you too. This place isn’t so bad. I’ve been here my whole life.”

She crossed her arms and stared up at me with a familiar look. “You like it here?”

“You have to make the most of every situation, sweetheart. If you think negative, negative happens.”

“You sound like my mom.”