Page 51 of Sinful as They Come (Sinful Trilogy #1)

Sawyer’s gaze was no longer on me, but I couldn’t stop looking at him.

At the way the moon casted the most beautiful glow on his pale skin.

I could see his emerald eyes. His soft, pink lips.

Those tussled locks that always looked like he had been running his hand through them.

And I could feel his heart. His kindness. His insecurities.

“What kind of person do you think I am?” I asked, not quite sure if I wanted to know the answer.

“I thought I knew you. Thought you were this vapid, too good for everyone girl.” A small smile grew on his face.

“But I’m seeing you differently now. You’re sweet.

Welcoming. You can be vulnerable when you wanna be.

I’ve seen you cry. Fuck, I had never seen you cry until these last couple months.

You’ve helped me in more ways than one, Holly.

And I wanna see more of that. More of you.

Wanna learn everything I can about you, but I can’t fucking get hurt.

I’ve already lost my mom. My dad hates the sight of me.

I don’t have much to give. I can’t give you what you deserve. And you deserve to have the best life.”

I didn’t know what else to do but kiss him.

I leaned forward, closing that small space between us so that I could get to his lips.

I heard him groan against me, his heavy hands landing on my waist as he pulled me that little bit closer to him.

He was so warm. Always. All of the time.

Did he think I didn’t want that? That I couldn’t want that?

His tongue slipped into my mouth, the move so enticing.

I let a few whimpers fall from my lips when Sawyer held me tighter, his long fingers holding me in the most delicious grip.

I wanted to crawl into his lap and grab his shoulders and run my fingers through his hair – but our current position prevented that.

But kissing Sawyer by the water, with the moon hovering above us like our own personal light, was enough to make it all better.

I wanted him. I wanted him just as much as he seemed to want me.

“You can’t kiss me like that." He pulled away from my lips, pressing his forehead to mine. He traced a gentle thumb across my bottom lip. “You don’t know what that does to me. It’s not fair, not unless I get to do it all the time.”

“But I want you to kiss me all the time.” My eyes slowly fluttered open, staring right into his deep green ones.

“You could have anyone you want. Anyone.”

“I don’t just want anyone. I promise you that.”

He gave me a sad smile. “You wanna be with a guy who lives in a trailer park?”

“I don’t care about that stuff.” I shook my head at him. “Do you really think I’m like that?”

“Holly, girls like you don’t end up with guys like me.

It just doesn’t happen. It’s a nice dream to have.

A nice, little fantasy. But I know that as much as I like kissing you, and as much as you live in my head, that you and me…

It’s just not gonna happen. I mean, Carter’s the kinda guy your parents would love – even though he never deserved you.

I’m not saying you should go back to him.

I wouldn’t let you do that. Fuck, I’d kill him before I even let you get near him.

But you need a guy who can give you everything you want. ”

I frowned. “I thought I showed you that I’m not some shallow person.”

He shrugged, giving me that sad smile again. “I don’t think you’re shallow. Not anymore, at least. But… I don’t know. Don’t you want a big house? Expensive car? Fancy shit I can’t afford? You wanna shack up with good ol’ Trailer Park Trash?”

I grabbed his hand tight at that name. That stupid, offensive name Carter had given him so many years ago. I always hated it. But I hated it even more now.

“Don’t.” I gave him a stern look. “Do not call yourself that. You are not… Look, I’m not that girl, Sawyer.

I don’t need a big house. I don’t need you to spend a million dollars on me.

God, I don’t need you to have a million dollars.

You think that stuff makes me happy? That it makes me what, proud?

It doesn’t. I’m so thankful to have what I have.

My parents… They’ve given me a good life. And maybe I’m a little spoiled…”

“A little?” chuckled Sawyer.

I gave him a playful slap. “My point is that I don’t want or need fancy things.

That stuff doesn’t make me happy. That kind of life doesn’t offer automatic happiness.

It offers comfort. An easy life. But I don’t just want an easy life.

I want so much more than that.” Then I said it.

I finally said the words. “And I’m pretty sure I want you. ”

Sawyer lifted up a hand, the one that had been on my waist, and rested his fingers on my chin.

He guided me closer, moving my face to his.

We kissed again. We kissed for the third time in under an hour, but I needed more of him.

My hands gripped at the collar of his shirt, pulling him as close as I could get him.

Our tongues moved together. Slow but… heavy.

The kiss got more and more intense, and soon Sawyer ha d me whimpering against his lips. He pulled away from me with a hiss.

“Fuck. I can’t get enough of that noise.” He licked at his lips. “Gonna need to hear more of that.”

I blushed, tucking some hair behind my ear. “What does this mean exactly? Because I don’t wanna go home tonight knowing that we can’t do this again.”

“I really, really want you to be mine. I promise I’ll take such good care of you.

I can’t buy you a diamond ring or anything.

But I swear I’ll spend every day trying to make you smile,” he murmured, his voice low and gravelly, the noise completely drawing me in to him. “You wanna be my girl, princess?”

Biting at my bottom lip, I gave him an eager nod. “More than anything.”