Page 40 of Sinful as They Come (Sinful Trilogy #1)

SAWYER

I could get through a two-week suspension easily. It was still a surprise to me that I had only been suspended once during the whole school year. So far, at least. There were plenty more opportunities to kick Carter’s head in.

Hanging around school property wasn’t allowed thanks to my shiny new suspension, so I texted Brodie a quick run down of my talk with Principal Yorke.

But I still couldn’t help but wonder where Holly was.

We were supposed to have class together.

English. But a quick and sneaky walk past our English room told me that she wasn’t there.

I had an urge to find her. I checked the library, making sure to look in every corner.

I checked the room that Holly used for her newspaper meetings.

I checked the cafeteria, only to come face to face with an empty room.

She wasn’t even sitting in the flower garden where I had found her the other day.

There was only one more place to look, and if she wasn’t there, then I was going to assume she just called it quits and went home for the day. Couldn’t blame her.

Taking long, quick strides, I quickly made my way to the back of the school. Where no one else went – most of the time, at least. It used to be just my spot, but when I rounded the corner to the brick wall, I saw a solemn Holly leaning up against it.

She was skipping class. There was a first time for everything.

“I punched him, like, fifteen times if that makes you feel any better,” was my greeting to her .

She turned to me slowly, brown eyes filled with tears once more. The only time I ever saw her cry was when Carter fucked up. Hopefully she would realize that she was better off without someone like him in his life. She wiped at her eyes quickly. Like I hadn’t already seen her cry before…

“It does.” She sniffled. “Kinda.”

I joined her, pressing my back to the wall but making sure to keep some space between us. Some distance still felt necessary. I pulled out a cigarette, thankful for the relief as the smoke filled my lungs.

“It’s weird seeing you sad. I think I like you a lot better when you yell at me,” I mumbled. “At least you’re happy then.”

She laughed softly. “It might be my favorite hobby.”

“Yeah, we’re both pretty good at it, huh?” I cleared my throat. “But… Look, you’re better when you stand up for yourself. When you’re all loud and in my face. I like how you never backed down from me. You never let me tell you what to do. You shouldn’t let anyone else treat you like he did.”

And I meant it. Part of me loved how she never shut up and refused to ever let me push her around.

Loved how she never shied away from trash talking me, those perfectly glossy lips always parting fast to mouth off at me without a second thought.

Holly knew how to stand up for herself when it came to me, and I wanted her to be like that for anyone who ever made her question herself.

“Thanks,” she said softly.

“I got suspended,” I said, my voice muffled a little as I bit down on my cigarette gently.

Holly whipped her head to me. “What?”

“It’s only for two weeks. Worth it, though.”

“I’m sorry. You got in trouble because of me.”

“I could use the time off, actually.”

“This is all my fault. I’ll talk to Principal Yorke and—"

“Holly, relax.” I held up my hands. “It’s not my first suspension. Probably won’t be my last.”

“I just… I don’t want you to get in trouble ‘cause of me. That’s not fair…”

Her eyes were so wide as she looked at me, her hands clasped behind her back. Her lips looked poutier than they usually did. That sweet scent of hers was in the air. I cleared my throat and turned away from her.

“It wasn’t because of you. I’ll take any opportunity to punch that asshole.

That was just a good opportunity to do it.

” That was a slight lie. I had been wanting to hit Carter again since the party, but some weird part of me had been defending Holly’s honor when he said all that shit about her not putting out.

“Oh,” she replied, turning away from me. “Well, either way… Thanks, I guess. Maybe he’ll leave me alone after this. But now I have to deal with everyone else knowing things about me they weren’t meant to know.” She blushed, staring down at the ground.

Did she really care if everyone knew she was a virgin?

I was still a little surprised by the fact.

I didn’t make it habit to think about Holly Sutton’s sex life, but my assumption had always been that she would have given it up for Carter.

That was my fault. I may have stereotyped Holly a little bit in the past and thought she was your cliché cheerleader.

To be fair, she had a cliché, douche bag, quarterback boyfriend.

But my calculations had been wrong. Not that any of that mattered now.

“Who cares what people think?” I murmured, taking a slow puff of my cigarette.

“It’s just… I feel so embarrassed. Everyone knows Carter was cheating, and now everyone knows that I’m a…”

She couldn’t even say the word. Virgin. With her pouty lips, flushed cheeks, and wide eyes, Holly appeared to be the picture of purity. I had been wrong about her. About that part of her life, at least.

Looking at her under the gentle light of the morning sun, I realized then that there was a sense of…

innocence… about her that I had never really picked up on.

Probably because in the past, the only time I ever thought about her was when she pissed me off.

But lately? Lately she had been in my life more than I was used to, and I was starting to see a side to her that was vulnerable and timid and…

innocent. How the fuck did Carter ever get her in the first place?

“Virgin?” I offered .

She bit at her bottom lip and nodded.

“There’s nothing wrong with that… Nothin’ to be embarrassed about.

” I was glad Holly had never let Carter get that far with her.

He didn’t deserve that. He didn’t deserve to be her fucking first. Holding back a grunt, I tried not to think about that too much.

About taking Holly and filling up her untouched pussy…

Fuck. That was such a good thought. It shouldn’t have been, but it was.

“I just wish the whole school wasn’t aware of my business.” Holly’s voice brought me out of my filthy thoughts.

“They’ll move on. They’ll find some other stupid piece of news to get worked up over and forget about it.”

Holly sucked in a sharp breath. “You’re being so nice to me, and I don’t even deserve it.”

“What makes you think you don’t deserve it?”

“We fight. We hate each other. We have not gotten along from day one.”

“That doesn’t mean you don’t deserve someone being nice to you,” I mumbled.

“Especially after how you’ve been helping me out lately.

The art deal got me some serious cash. That’s groceries for a while.

And… that article.” I kept my eyes on her, needing her to know that I meant everything I was saying.

“I wasn’t lying when I said it was the nicest thing anyone has ever said about me. ”

“I’m glad you liked it,” she said softly. “And it was the truth. Every word of it. I love your art. I wish I could see more of it, actually.”

My heart literally fucking fluttered when she said that. Fluttered . Christ. It was the way she was looking at me too, with those pretty eyes. Yes, pretty. They were fucking pretty. I could admit that too. They were glowing under the sun, framed by her thick lashes.

“I could always show you more…” I muttered. “If you really wanted to see my stuff…”

“I do,” she said sweetly. “I love the art you make.”

“You wouldn’t have thought so.”

“Well… We’ve had that wall between us this whole time…”

“I never wanted it to be there. Not at the start, at least. Not when I first saw you that day in class…”

She winced. “You remember that?”

“Vividly,” I said with a little snort. “Fuckin’ Carter, huh?”

“I’m sorry. I never should have… I was the new girl, and I didn’t…

I reacted badly. Really badly. I should have stood my own ground.

I should have told you what I wanted to tell you: that I didn’t care what you could or couldn’t afford,” she whispered.

“None of that meant anything to me. It still doesn’t. I’m not that person.”

I nodded at her words, looking ahead of me as I puffed out some smoke. “You had no issue with him, though. With Carter. You knew what kind of person he was.”

“I guess I got caught up in his popularity,” she said.

I sensed what sounded like regret in her voice.

“He was nice to me at the start. The most popular guy in school wanted to be friends with me. I fell for that stupid trap. I was too stupid to realize that I should have been pushing someone like him far, far away from me.”

“That’s where it all started, huh? In that classroom.

All over a pen,” I said with a little chuckle.

“But it was more than that. It was… I know I’m fuckin’ poor.

I know I live in a goddamn trailer. I’m reminded of that fact every day I wake up.

People have been giving me shit for that my whole life.

Including Carter. Every fuckin’ day – even before you showed up.

He’s always been an asshole. And when you gave in to him, it felt like another person looking at me and telling me I wasn’t good enough.

You could have said something. Not just that day, but every day after that.

How many times did you stand by as you watched him call me his favorite nickname? ”

Holly bit at her bottom lip. “I guess I was a coward. That was my mistake. But… You always stood up for yourself. Every time. You always made sure to fight back, and I honestly always admired that about you. Even when you were, you know, punching Carter in the face.”