Page 43 of Sinful as They Come (Sinful Trilogy #1)

HOLLY

It wasn’t fair that some people had such easy lives and others got to glide by like nothing really mattered. And what was completely unfair was that some people had hurdles thrown their way from day one.

Sawyer was like that. And while I had known him as nothing but a bad boy who stole and swore and smoked and got under my skin, I had soon discovered that he was more than that.

He was oddly protective for someone who disliked me so much.

That wasn’t just a one time thing too. At Alden Lake he looked out for me and helped me get away from Carter’s wandering hands.

He had hit Carter at the party after he caught Carter in the act.

And he had hit Carter again when he wouldn’t let up and leave me alone earlier today.

Sawyer had done more for me than Carter ever had. And while I believed violence wasn’t always the answer, I was pretty sure Sawyer’s actions came from a good place. Maybe his heart wasn’t as dark as I had thought.

Which was why I was going to help him.

My trunk was filled with a wide assortment of groceries. Pasta, meat, vegetables, sauces. Sawyer had done me favor after favor – whether he realized it or not. And I was about to do him one.

When I got back to his place, I braced myself for a possible screaming match.

Sometimes it seemed like Sawyer didn’t want to be helped.

I understood that: especially if that help was coming from someone he had never liked.

But I was willing to take the risk if it meant Sawyer would have some food on the table. Brodie too.

Knocking on his trailer door, I was greeted with a very confused looking Sawyer. And a grinning Brodie in the background.

“Where’d you go?” Sawyer asked.

“Don’t get mad at me,” was my answer to him.

Sawyer raised an eyebrow at me. “Why? What’d you do?”

“You need groceries. You’re in a bad position right now. I can’t fix everything. But maybe I can help with this one, little thing, so I bought some stuff,” I said the words quickly, needing to say my piece just in case Sawyer took my actions the wrong way.

Sawyer sighed loudly and leaned on the doorway. “You bought groceries? You didn’t need to do that.”

“Look, you’ve helped me a lot lately,” I whispered. “And after earlier, maybe we’ve made amends? We don’t have to be besties. Just let me help you. I’m not doing this to be a bitch or to make you feel bad. I just really wanna help the both of you.”

“Holly, we’ll be fine. I told you: my dad’s done this shit before. I dealt with it then and I’ll deal with it again.”

“Just let me make your life a little bit easier. Please.”

“ Holly .”

“ Sawyer .”

He shut his eyes. “I didn’t ask you to do this. I’m used to having to deal with this kinda shit. I’ve been taking care of myself for a long, long time.”

I let out a breath. “Well, why don’t you let someone else take care of you for once?”

Sawyer’s eyes slowly opened up at that. He was looking at me in a way he had never looked at me before. It would be a lie if I said I didn’t like it.

Sawyer nodded slowly before gesturing for me to come inside. “You sit. Me and Brodie will get ‘em.”

I took a seat at the small dining table, taking in the sight of the scattered magnets on the fridge as Sawyer and Brodie got to work on bringing the bags in.

It would be enough stuff to last them a few weeks at least, hopefully until Sawyer got back on his feet.

When all the bags were inside, Brodie stood at the doorway with a smile.

“I gotta go,” he told us, thumbing at the door. “Me and Lucas are going to the skatepark.”

“You never said anything about that,” Sawyer said, a tone of suspicion in his voice. “And you usually ask me for a ride everywhere.”

Brodie snorted. “Yeah, I know. But I’m gonna walk today.”

“Where’s your skateboard?” I narrowed my eyes at his empty hands.

“You kids have fun!” Brodie slammed the door shut before either of us could say much.

“Fuckin’ Brodie,” Sawyer muttered before turning to me, a serious look on his face. “You didn’t have to do all of this, Holly. Me and Brodie are gonna have enough food for weeks… Thank you…” There was some hesitation in his voice. “I appreciate this. A lot.”

I could tell that was hard for him to say. I didn’t want him to feel like a charity case, but maybe that insecurity still lingered. “You’re welcome,” was all I said, reaching out for a bag.

“You don’t have to unpack this shit. This stuff, I mean. The groceries.”

“I don’t mind helping.” I smiled at him, getting to work on the bag closest to me.

I kept my mouth shut as Sawyer huffed next to me, but we were able to unpack the groceries without a single fight.

It was nice to not scream at Sawyer for once.

I let Sawyer place stuff in the cabinets since he knew where everything went, while I got to work on most of the vegetables and meat.

“What are you gonna have for dinner tonight?”

Sawyer scratched at the back of his head. “I normally eat wings and pizza. Not that I’m complaining that you didn’t get that stuff or anything.”

“You missed the couple frozen pizzas in the freezer, actually.” I laughed. “How about I make you something? Brodie can eat it. If he ever gets back from his date with Lucas at the skatepark.”

Sawyer turned to me, looking at me seriously. “You’ve already helped me enough."

“Just let me make you dinner. Something with vegetables.”

“Pizza has vegetables. The toppings are vegetables.”

“That… That does not count. Go. Sit. I’ll cook. ”

“Wait… I’ll cook with you,” Sawyer told me lowly, almost cautiously.

“You probably think I’m a dumbass ‘cause all I eat is pizza and wings and microwaved stuff. But my dad never taught me that shit.” He looked down at the ground and let out a long breath.

“And my mom didn’t hang around long enough to do that either. ”

There was mystery surrounding Sawyer’s mother. I hadn’t even met Sawyer’s dad but I knew the man was an abusive loser. But his mom? What was the story there? I was curious. But I wasn’t going to push him.

“I don’t think you’re a dumbass. I’ll teach you,” I offered with my softest voice. “I promise it’s not too hard.”

Sawyer nodded, licking at his lips. It was so weird when he got quiet. I was so used to arguing with him that his silent side made me realize just how alone we were. No Brodie. Just me and Sawyer in his small kitchen.

“How do you feel about chicken stir fry?” I broke the silence. “I’m not the best cook in the world, but I can whip up something good and teach you a thing or two.”

“If you cook anything like your mom, I think I’ll like it.”

The compliment about her made me smile. “Well, we’ll see if I can live up to her sandwiches. You wanna cut some vegetables with me? What do you like?”

It didn’t take long for an array of cut up vegetables to be scattered across the chopping board.

We had some carrots, green beans, and broccoli.

Sawyer insisted that he’d hate broccoli, but I convinced him to let me leave the ingredient in.

Soon me and Sawyer were standing side by side at the stove, stirring the chicken and vegetables around.

The savory smell met my nose and I realized then how hungry I was.

I didn’t eat much during the day thanks to being upset about the whole Carter situation.

When dinner was finished, I clasped my hands together and turned to Sawyer. “Okay, hopefully that was helpful. Or maybe I just convinced you to never cook again.”

Sawyer laughed, popping a fork into the fry pan so he could eat a piece of chicken. “Nah. This was good. This was… This was helpful. Thanks.”

I gave him a little shrug before looking at the clock. “No problem. I guess I’ll get out of your hair. I’ll see you at school. You know, whenever your suspension is over…”

Sawyer bit at his bottom lip and just stared at me. There was a look in his eyes I had never seen before. There was usually so much hate in them. But he was staring at me with what felt like curiosity.

“Do you wanna stay for dinner?” he asked lowly.

My eyebrows rose. “You mean like…?”

He nodded. “Yeah. Do you wanna eat dinner with me?”

Why did that sound like a date? It wasn’t. I knew it wasn’t. But the situation and his words and the fact that we were all alone with nothing and no one to get in the way were all so appealing to me.

“I’d like that,” I whispered.

Sawyer said nothing as he grabbed some plates and cutlery for us.

He did the work, getting our plates ready as we sat down at the round dining table.

It was small but cozy; our dining table at home was so big that eating meals together often felt like an empty experience.

But this was nice. It felt warm and wholesome, like how meals were meant to be experienced.

Sawyer’s eyes shut for a second as he ate some of the stir fry. “Fuck, this tastes good.”

I giggled. “I’m glad you like it.”

“I can’t remember the last time I had a proper, home cooked meal,” he mumbled, taking a few more bites. “Must have been when my mom was still here. You and me didn’t even know each other then. That’s how long ago it was.”

Again, I resisted the urge to ask for more details about her. “There should be enough for Brodie when he gets back. And for some leftovers tomorrow.”

“I’m not sharing with him.” Sawyer shook his head. Then he sat his fork down. “Thanks for doing this.”

I waved a hand at him. “The groceries were no problem.”

“No, I mean… Not just that. Thanks for cooking. For teaching me. I don’t know if I retained any of that information, but I appreciate it, anyway.”

“I’m glad I could help. Anytime.”

Sawyer sucked in a sharp breath. “I’m not really used to people looking after me. Sometimes I don’t… react too well to it. I don’t wanna be anyone’s charity case.”

“You’re not a charity case,” I said quietly. “I don’t see that when I look at you. You deserve help. Everyone deserves help. And you’ve helped me too. And I don’t just mean defending me today…”