Page 163 of Should the Sky Fall

“I’m not a shrink,” Ellis says. “And I have no intention of defending you. No way. But honestly, looking back at the way we were raised? It’s not quite surprising you turned out to be…you know.”

“You turned out fine.”

Ellis laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “You have no idea how fucked up I am, Cal.”

Cal has a hard time believing that. “Are you an alcoholic?”

Ellis lifts a shoulder. “I enjoy a drink or two.”

“But it’s not an addiction.”

“No.”

“Have you been in a relationship?”

“Not a serious one.”

Cal wants to point out how Ellis likes to avoid answering a simple yes and no, but doesn’t. “Have you hurt any of your partners?”

Ellis looks at him. “There have been times I was a jerk.”

“But have you hurt them? Intentionally. Repeatedly.”

Ellis sighs. “No.”

“Then you’re not nearly as messed up as you think you are.”

“I have my issues.”

“Doesn’t everyone? You might not be perfect, but you’re a good person. You were there for Dawson and you didn’t even know him that well. You took care of my screw-ups, dealt with the police and the company and never asked for anything.”

“You’re family,” Ellis says, fidgeting and avoiding Cal’s gaze. It reminds Cal of Dawson, and how he always looks uncomfortable when faced with a compliment.

“Based on what we just spent nearly an hour talking about, it’s clear that blood doesn’t mean much. I was terrible to you our whole life. Our mom walked out on us and our dad was a controlling asshole.” A morbid thought crosses Cal’s mind. “You might be right. Someone was bound to turn out like him. I’m just glad it wasn’t both of us.”

“There’s no one at this table who’s like him.”

Cal smiles at the hidden meaning in Ellis’ words. “I hope so.”

The conversation steers more towards small talk territory, but it’s surprisingly pleasant. Cal might be the only one who lost his memory, but it feels like they’re getting to know each other properly for the first time. It’s like Ellis said—they were never close.

“Read any interesting books lately?” Ellis asks with a sly grin.

“I started readingMe Before You, but couldn’t finish it after Dawson told me it doesn’t have a happy ending.”

“I thought you were only into fantasy.”

“Mainly, not only.”

“Why are you reading hetero stuff, by the way?”

“Huh?”

Ellis gives him a curious look. “You like dick. Why are you not reading about two men instead?”

That’s…actually a brilliant idea. Why hadn’t he thought of that before?

“Any recommendations?”