Page 9

Nature’s garden was my playground as a child. The habits I’d adopted in my mother’s overgrown garden had followed me into adulthood. With acres of my own, now, I couldn’t wait to revisit my fondest memories as a child.

And create new ones for my future children.

There would be some. Two at least. The jury was still out, and my discernment didn’t confirm or deny the details of my life that far into the future.

It was a rather hard pill to swallow, but the idea of anything being a mystery in my world was invigorating.

Even him . Because it was a gift and a curse knowing things, seeing things, feeling things, and hearing things before they happened.

The wheels of Sac’s vehicle halted, bringing my peace to a close. I inhaled deeply, opening my eyes as the familiar building settled in my sight.

We’re here .

Our time had come to an end. So had my comfort. Sac shifted gears and altered his position. Wordlessly, he faced me.

In silence, we sat. Unmoving. Both unsure of what to say to conclude our time together. As the clock ticked, anxiety swelled in my chest. I stared out of the window, preparing to bolt from his SUV.

I pressed my teeth together, ready to rip the bandage off at once. There was no other way to ease back into reality.

Head first .

The dive was necessary. Crucial to the progression of my day.

Here goes nothing.

I aligned my fingers with the handle and snatched it back. My body raised from the seat as the door opened. Just as quickly as it lifted, it fell. Hard. His arm wrapped around my elbow, pulling me backward. Pulling me toward him. Pulling me back into the car.

And, then, his lips…

They pressed against mine.

His tongue parted them.

My eyelids fainted.

Fireworks sparked in the darkness.

My lungs howled, begging for the air he was reducing by the millisecond.

My entire body tingled with pricks directly to my skin, scalp, nails, and toes.

My stomach flipped a hundred times. Butterflies formed an alliance, combining their strength to open the gates and allow the entire zoo inside. Buffalos stampeded through the entry point. Bisons. Giselles. Tigers. Lions. Cheetahs. Bears. Jaguars.

My God . My soul cried out for help.

There was none.

There was nothing.

Nothing but him and I.

Then, suddenly, it all ended. The sunlight welcomed me as the wind nearly blew me away. Vulnerable and completely out of my element, I touched the crime scene. My lips hurt so good.

I removed my hand and placed my fingers in front of my eyes. There was no blood.

Unbelievable .

My brows curled toward my forehead. I was perplexed. Nothing was adding up. Not even my position right outside of Sac’s truck. Not even the empty driver’s seat.

Life didn’t give me a fighting chance before he was in front of me, again. In my personal space. His space . The space that was designed especially for him.

“Maybe I fucked up the hundred times before. Maybe I couldn’t get it right. Maybe we couldn’t get it right. I don’t know, and frankly, I don’t give a fuck. I figured, though, I’d better try my damndest this time. To get shit right– first try.”

As the words left his mouth, his hand was in my pocket, retrieving my phone and punching in one number after the other. I struggled to keep up.

With him.

My heart.

My head.

My body.

My breathing.

Everything was too much.

Too fast. Too real. Too right.

“Sa–”

His finger pressed against my lips, right where his mouth once was. They ached.

Ached for him.

Ached for his lips.

His gentleness.

“Shhhh– you aren’t in control of your thoughts right now, Rome. Neither am I. Let’s not sabotage. Let’s just– just let this shit happen. Whatever it is.”

“I– I j–”

There they were. On me. His hands. His lips. His chest.

And, then, they were gone. So was he. My cell was back in my hand and my world was spinning again.

I stood outside of his truck, wondering which universe I’d been catapulted into and if we were still in our hundredth and one lifetime. Maybe we had moved on to another one. It sure felt like it, but it didn’t look like it. I was still in the same clothes and he was still… He was still glorious.

“Go ahead, Rome. Go ahead in the house. Because, if you keep standing there I won’t be able to keep my word and consider you human.

I’ll consider you mine and might not let you out of my sight again.

Not because I’m holding you against your will, but because I’m holding you right where you want to be.

Just like you want to be held. Hostage.”

My hand went to my chest.

Steady.

I warned my heart.

Please.

He was much better than the dreams. Much more profound. Much more consuming. Much more addictive. Much more assertive. Much more …

This makes no sense. None of it .

I turned without a word, heading toward the building. My legs felt like noodles. My head felt like a balloon. My chest felt like a valley. Sac had come in and excavated all the fixtures placed before his arrival, clearing me out so that he could begin to build.

Right there. Right there .

I entered my family’s loft with barely a breath to spare. My back collided with the door as I tried to understand how one’s heart could break and mend at once. Slowly, I slid to the floor, anchoring myself in the coolness of the polished concrete beneath me.

My hands enveloped my face. Air rushed from my lungs. Tears stung my eyes. A smile cornered my cheeks. And, an ache so damn good shot through my entire body.

Bzzzzt.

Bzzzzt.

The vibration of my phone was jarring. Without even a glance at the screen, I answered the call, head still buried between my hand and knees.

“Yes?”

“Seven o’clock, Rome. Get pretty and meet me at the entrance of your building. I’ll be back.”

I listened. Listened to his shallow breathing. Listened to his ruffled feathers. Listened to his discomfort. Listened to his desperation. Listened to his deep, apparent desire. Listened to his heart as it led every move he made. I listened.

“Rome,” he belted, full of emotion. Full of feelings he didn’t understand but I had an explanation for. I’d studied them, felt them, and suppressed them for years and years, waiting until I encountered him to truly release them.

“Yes?”

“Seven o’clock.”

“Seven o’clock,” I pushed out.

The call ended. I laid my head against the door, allowing the phone to fall onto the floor beside me. As I gathered myself, there was a single thought that stuck with me.

“He’s real.”

Boom.

Boom.

Boom.

Boom .

Hard knuckles slammed against the door, pulling me from the depths of my latest reality. I wiped the moisture from my eyes and stood on my feet. When I pulled the door open, Augusti lost his balance, nearly falling into the loft.

I pushed past Koen and continued into the hallway. Two sets of footsteps followed close behind. I stood in front of the elevator, waiting for the cart. August’s thumb pressed the down arrow.

I shook my head, trying to collect myself. I was completely out of my element. There were so many things happening inside of me, happening to me .

“He wouldn’t be pleased with your behavior this morning, Balle,” Koen chastised.

“I’m aware. But, has he informed you all that I am twenty-four, not fourteen?”

“He’s well aware, and so are we. However, this is a very sensitive time for everyone. You. Us. Him. Everyone. Our intentions aren’t to treat you like a child. It’s to protect you as if you were our child. And, that’s what we’re going to do.

“No matter what that looks like for us or how that makes you feel. It makes us feel better knowing we won’t have to report your death or hospitalization or abduction to our boss. Play fair, Balle, and we’ll do the same.”

“I have a date tonight,” I expressed.

I wasn’t defiant. It wasn’t in my nature. However, I’d wanted a moment to myself, a moment of freedom, and was denied. Koen and Augusti were simply casualties.

“We’ll respect your space.”

“Thank you.”

“Your phone, Balle,” August said, handing me my cellular device.

Sac had placed my heart in my hands, leaving little room to carry the phone out of the loft. I was busy trying to surgically improve the placement and attachment of my heart to my pericardium so that it wouldn’t fall out of my chest again.

I have to call Roaman . I thought. This can’t happen again .

With remorseful eyes, I peered at the device in August’s hand, unable to take it into mine. They were full.

The ringlet fell onto my shoulder, joining the others.

I slid my finger up the end and twirled it in place, simultaneously spraying the contents of the large brown aerosol can.

It would keep my curls in place for the next six to twenty-four hours, depending on my range of motion and level of activity.

“Rome– did you hear me, honey?”

My mother’s voice enclosed around me like a soft blanket on a cold day.

“Yes, ma’am.”

Preparing for my first day with my mother on FaceTime, my brother many miles away, my father in the ground, and my sisters occupied with the families they’d created wasn’t exactly how I’d thought any of this would go.

Yet, here we were. Here I was, twenty-four and keeping the secret from everyone except my mother.

I wasn’t sixteen. I wasn’t eighteen. I didn’t need an audience to send me off. Their support post-date would serve me well, because I knew there would be plenty. For now, I wanted to settle my nerves and open my heart.

Seven o’clock . His words stuck with me.

Get pretty . It was my favorite part.

I’ll be back .

“Did you make a decision?” She asked, referring to the dress options. I’d shown her four, but only one truly had my heart.

“Yes, Mother. I have made a decision.”

“A-line. Chiffon. Cocktail. Brown.”

“Yes. That gown. I think it’s suitable for the night. Not too serious. Not casual. Right in between. Great for dinner. Great for the bar. Great for the after hour spots if we are talking a progressive date night.”

“Yes. That’s a great choice, baby.”