Page 7

Slowly, he took the seat in front of me. His eyes were still curious, wondering if I was being honest with my response.

“I’m fine.”

With pursed lips, he nodded. I placed the cup to my lips and sipped without haste.

Ummmm .

My nostrils widened at the smell of Sac’s freshly brewed coffee. Naturally, my eyes landed on the cup.

“Black. No sugar. No cream. Nothing.”

Nodding, he tittered. “Black. No sugar. No cream. Nothing.”

“Sounds like someone I know,” I said, kissing the skin of my teeth.

“Yeah?”

“A few people, actually.”

“Do they include you?”

“They do,” I admitted, thinking of all my sisters.

“Fair enough, but you’ve got it all wrong. A little.”

“How so?”

“Sugar–” he added.

“Sugar?”

“You’re as sweet as they come, Rome. Maybe not as much this morning because I am a complete stranger, but it’s there.

I sense it. You’re as sugary as they come.

I know because I have a sweet tooth. The dentist and even my parents have warned me about it over the years, but I just can’t help myself. I love the rush.”

I gnawed on my bottom lip, trying my hardest to hold back the mouth-splitting smile.

I straightened my posture, attempting to find something, anything to deflect.

Sac was too good, and I was too invested because I knew how our story ended.

He didn’t, and because of that, I had to let things progress naturally.

Allow him to do a man’s job. Allow him to hunt. To discover. To chase. To capture. To conquer. And, to care for. I wouldn’t interrupt the cycle of a man’s hunting season because I was privy to information he wasn’t. He needed these moments to stroke his ego and inflate his pride.

“A rapper?” I asked, curious of his occupation.

Chuckling, he shook his head. “I can’t rap for shit, Rome. Try again.”

“Singer?”

“I’d send everyone to the hospital with bleeding ears. Nah.”

“Sports.”

He nodded.

“Something like that.”

“They love you.” I told him, looking around at the people who had yet to take their eyes off us. “And, respect you.”

There wasn’t a camera in sight. No one had invaded his personal space. Respect was hard to gain with any amount of notoriety. He had plenty.

“I’ve made it clear over the years that I do not like cameras. Socials. Medias. All of that shit is irrelevant to me. I just want to play the game. Nothing more. The day it becomes more is the day I quit. It is on record.”

He understood.

“I feel the same way,” I explained, taking a sip from my cup. “Nothing more. I just want to perform.”

“Perform– poet?”

He squinted his eyes as if he was actually on to something. He wasn’t. I was amused, utterly.

“I look like a poet?” I sniggered in disbelief.

“You feel like one. You haven’t said much, but you give those vibes. Deep. Rooted. Soulful. In tune with nature. In tune with your body. In tune with your heart. Knowledgeable. Wise. Thoughtful. Probably love to garden or have sound bowls and shit at your crib. Not fond of the city life.”

I waited for his dissection of my life to begin before filling him in.

“Though some of those might be true, they’re not all true.

I’m a privately educated kid. I have been sheltered my entire life.

A late bloomer , as many would call it. For good reason.

I’m in tune with things– not just my things.

All things. Even yours. I do love gardening, but I don’t get to indulge as much as I’d like.

“I don’t own sound bowls but I’ve dreamt of the day that I will. The suburbs of Clarke are all I know. I don’t visit the city often. Not unless I’m going to the theater. But, never leisurely. It doesn’t interest me. Not much interests me.”

“An actress?”

“A ballerina. I’m a ballerina.”

Silently, Sac nodded.

“Fitting.”

“Fitting?” He was incredibly amusing.

“You’re poised. You’re in control of your body parts at all times. You’re agile. Your presence is fleeting. You don’t require much space although you take up much more than you imagine you do.

“Your ego seems to not exist, but your standards are clear without you clarifying them. You’re almost like a butterfly. A sight to see but impossible to touch. Even with you near enough, it feels incriminating to do so.”

It could end your life, Sac. One wrong touch. One wrong move. I’m sorry. I didn’t make the rules .

“A ballerina,” he whispered, exhaling.

“My standards exist,” I expressed.

It’s you. You’re the standard. My standard.

“Yeah?” He chuckled.

Bosses only, baby. Chem’s words echoed in my head.

The biggest or no one at all. The best or no one at all, baby.

Big pockets. Big deals. Big accounts. Big businesses.

Big motherfucking shit, baby. Because you will come in and be the biggest thing in a nigga’s world.

Make sure you have something to fall back on.

Something of his because he will always expect something of yours.

“Yes.”

“Good to know I fit the bill.”

You are the bill .

“Middle child of three?” He asked.

“Youngest of seven. Eleven if you include those who share my brother’s blood. I’d like to think they’re always included.”

“Eleven–” he whistled.

“Eleven.”

“A far cry from the two your parents decided were enough.”

Sitting up straight and tilting his head, he peered at me.

“And, how’d you know that?”

Shrugging, I exhaled, “A wild guess.”

“Nothing wild about that guess, Rome. You know exactly what you’re talking about, love.”

“I have my ways. My feelings. My assumptions.”

“They’re always that spot on?”

“Usually.”

“How old am I?”

“Twenty–” I paused, “Seven or eight. I’m leaning more toward twenty-eight.”

Nodding, he confirmed.

“Have your parents ever considered getting you checked out?”

I shook my head, “No. Because, I’m not the only one in my family who just knows.”

“Understood.”

Nothing more was said. I sipped from the matcha in my cup. Sac took slow, hesitant sips of his steaming coffee. The silence was comforting. I felt as though I’d been vomiting at the mouth, somehow ruining any chance I had with the man from my dreams.

Yet, the longing stares and random smiles that were dangerously contagious assured me he was still intrigued. Still interested. Still fascinated. Still hunting. Still chasing.

“Your eyes–” Sac began, pointing toward my face, “the way they crease in the corners as if they’re causing you pain, but they’re just expressing the pleasure you feel in the moment…

I like that. While the rest of your face remains flawless, skin tight and plump and soft, those corners are not alright. Yet, they are. So contradicting.”

The deep grunt that made his chest cave was more of the same. He wasn’t in pain. The pleasure was written all over his face.

“You’re expressive.”

“Not usually,” he said before taking another sip.

“What changed?”

He lowered his cup, gazing at me with sincerity in his orbs. His shoulders lifted and then fell.

“I’m still trying to figure it out, Rome. But, whatever it was changed the moment I saw you stretching this morning. A barrier was broken. The levees were disabled. And, I’ve been flooded with words and thoughts and feelings since.”

“I thought it was only me,” I confessed.

He shook his head. “No. You’re not alone, love. If I can help it, you’ll never be alone again.”

My breath hiked in my throat. I swallowed, trying to free my airways. Another sip from my cup wasn’t enough to relieve me. I rubbed circles in my chest, attempting to calm my raging heart.

Sac said nothing. His eyes never left me, neither did his power. I was kneeling before him, waiting for the next command, and I wasn’t sure if he recognized me. Recognized my submission.

“You’re a gorgeous woman, Rome. I pray I’m not the first to tell you that. You should be told every day. It’s the least you deserve.”

“You’re not the first.”

“Good. Unbreak my heart,” he said, placing a hand on his chest.

I shook my head, trying to get rid of the silly smile on my face.

“Breakfast?” His baritone silenced my thoughts.

Taking a look around, I asked, “Is the food not good here?”

“It is. I’m fucking with it. Just didn’t know if you wanted to go somewhere quieter or–”

“The chatter helps quiet my thoughts. I have too many right now. Somewhere quiet would likely drive me to the brink of insanity.”

His smile was darling.

“I feel you. I’m not too far behind you.”

“Here is fine. This works for me.”

“Say less. I’ll be right back.”

He didn’t ask for my order. My preference. My allergies. Nothing. Before I could begin to tell him, he had disappeared again. Finally, I could breathe. I sat my cup on the table and placed my head in my hands. Slowly, I exhaled.

“Fuck,” I whispered into my palms.

Profanity wasn’t a preference of mine. In fact, I had scrubbed it from my vocabulary almost completely. But, sometimes… Sometimes, it was well worth the filth I felt after using it.

I unlocked my cell, contemplating calling Royce back.

As quickly as the thought came, it fled.

Focusing on regaining control of my body and rebuilding my nervous system before Sac’s return was my main focus.

I’d succeeded at everything I’d ever put my mind to, but somehow I doubted I’d succeed at my current mission.

Nevertheless, I wasn’t a quitter so trying was a must.

Get it together, baby. Teddy’s voice rang out. It had always been a source of reasoning.

I nodded, lifting my head from my hands. I straightened my spine and placed my palms against my thighs. Closing my eyes, I leaned my head backward.

Focus, Rome .

Giving too much too soon was a mistake women made far too often. A man that had to do no work to secure a woman was a man that wouldn’t work to keep that woman. It was simple math. There was nothing complex about it.

Knowing Sac belonged in my world didn’t matter. He was still required to work to gain his position, maintain his position, and secure it in this lifetime. What he’d done in the others didn’t transfer over. He was starting at ground zero.