Page 39 of Retrograde

Lucie had suffered a tumultuous night’s sleep.

The sudden shift between her and Brett made spending last night alone, without him next to her or at least across the hall, feel heavy on her heart, and she knew without a shadow of a doubt that if he let her, she would be back in his arms tonight whether it remained platonic or not.

Her willpower was at its lowest point, and she didn’t have the energy to pretend she didn’t want him any more.

She yawned as she crossed the border into Capannori. Faith had sat in her room with her until long past midnight so they could start planning the schedule for Le Mans content.

They’d almost nailed the schedule, but knowing how particular they were, they would be emailing and texting back and forth with changes over the next few days.

Their next mammoth task was rounding up the social media staff for every other team on the grid, double-checking the nature of their content plans, and finalising the social media schedule for the organisation’s main accounts.

Thankfully with Esme’s promotion and the recent introduction of an experienced social media manager from another championship, they could keep up.

As she turned into the road leading up to the farm, Lucie could see a car she didn’t recognise on the driveway. Her parents hadn’t had much of an opportunity to make friends yet, only with neighbours who all lived within walking distance.

She parked next to it and made a beeline for the voices she could hear round the back of the house. There seemed to be quite a few higher-pitched tones, and then she heard it. Cleo Anderson’s cackle of a laugh. Brett’s family were here.

‘Do I hear my favourite Anderson siblings?’ she called out, rounding the corner. Two heads of rich, brunette hair looked up at her and she was met with screams.

‘You’re back!’ Cleo ran to her and jumped into her arms, her tall frame nearly knocking Lucie to the ground, while Piper held back with a grin on her usually sullen face. Maybe Maggie was right, Piper was actually a fan of hers.

‘What are you guys doing here?’ She hugged them tight, so thrilled they were there, especially when she saw the smile on Brett’s face, and Maggie over at the table with Rosa, fussing over something but stopping briefly to wave at Lucie.

‘We wanted to come and hang out with Brett while you’re at Le Mans.

Booked the flights with Mum’s savings when we heard you guys were coming.

It’s winter break and Piper had leave to use at work, so we figured why not come and annoy our brother.

’ Cleo pulled Lucie over to the table, where there was fresh fruit juice, salad, charcuterie boards and pastries.

It was a spread that rivalled the five-star service those in the motorsport industry were accustomed to. All Rosa’s doing, no doubt.

‘Are you doing the whole Euro Summer trend thing?’ Lucie glanced down at their outfits. They each wore summer dresses; Cleo in a white one with a lemon print all over it, and Piper in a sage-green satin midi dress. They looked like they had been plucked straight from a travel blog.

‘Yes! We’ve already cycled to the market in town.

We got new tote bags, silk scarves, and Rosa recommended the best fresh pasta and truffle oil which we’re going to use for dinner tonight.

’ Piper listed off their purchases, her eyes alight with excitement.

It was the most animated Lucie had ever seen her.

‘You girls are so funny,’ Rosa teased. ‘I didn’t even know what the term Euro Summer meant until you arrived! The only social media content I consume is what my Lucie posts.’

‘What does it mean?’ Mateo mumbled, confused.

‘It just means spending your summer in Europe, embracing the culture and the fashion, Mr Carolan,’ Cleo informed him.

‘Oh.’ He looked down at his shorts and shoes. ‘Do crocs count?’

Everyone laughed as he wiggled his Lightning McQueen crocs in the air, the light-up ones that were near-impossible to find. They had been a gift from the Andersons last Christmas, and he never took them off.

Brett poured some juice into Lucie’s glass and leaned in close. It sent shivers down her spine as she felt the warmth of his breath on her neck. ‘How was your trip?’

‘It was good. Lots of positive media coverage,’ she murmured back. She didn’t want to open this conversation up to the whole table and have Brett made to feel awkward about his absence. ‘Woods passes on his best wishes.’

‘Really? That’s nice.’ He smiled back at her. ‘Did you all go out last night?’

‘No, I worked until I couldn’t keep my eyes open.’

‘Sunny…’ he tutted. ‘You need to stop working so hard all the time and do something for you. The world can wait sometimes, you know. Look around you.’ He gestured at the landscape.

‘Enjoy this. I know the main reason we’re here isn’t so great, and that’s entirely my fault, but it doesn’t all have to be bad.

We’re lucky to be here, of all places. Relax, soak it all in. ’

‘I know, but my work barely feels like work. You know I love what I do,’ she insisted.

‘I just don’t want the stress building up too much.’ Brett’s hand found her thigh and she shifted. Not uncomfortably, but cautiously. He always did that. It was a friendly gesture. Except now she wasn’t so sure if there was a new meaning behind it.

Lucie helped herself to food, piling her plate high.

She had skipped breakfast this morning, opting for an extra hour of sleep before setting off on her journey back home.

She’d barely had time to say goodbye to the team before departing, leaving them to enjoy the city without her until it was time for their flights.

Marco had decided to head to Hawaii with Faith and Julien.

If Brett caught wind of that, would it make him feel worse about everything?

Maybe if he saw them posting about it, he wouldn’t care.

His family was here. Lucie and her parents were here.

He seemed comfortable, relaxed and, most importantly, happy.

But Lucie knew it was early days and he had a long road ahead, and the feeling of being isolated was going to reside in the back of his mind until Jasper invited him back to the team.

They had a Christmas fundraiser in December which Lucie imagined would be his first trial run, but that was months away.

He had plenty of time to go downhill again first.

‘Does anyone want more orange juice?’ Lucie held up the empty pitcher.

‘Yes, please!’ Cleo yelled above the noise.

They were so loud and animated; it was like being at a trackside autograph session all the time.

Having been raised in a big, boisterous family herself, Lucie didn’t know the meaning of peace and quiet.

She liked the noise. She especially liked that every time Brett’s eyes raked over her, or his hand went back to her thigh, or his arm rested across the back of her chair, she didn’t have time to let her mind wander to the consequences because next thing she knew, someone was breaking the tension with a wild story.

But still, it was getting harder not to respond and she didn’t want to make it obvious to their families that something was different, so she used the juice as an escape route and hurried into the kitchen in search of the oranges.

‘Lucie?’ She turned to see Piper in the entryway.

It was easy to forget that she and Brett were twins because they were so different; opposite in everything except their looks.

None of the Anderson siblings had inherited Maggie’s blonde locks, they were all dark haired and the spitting image of their dad, but Piper and Brett had olive complexions, sharper jawlines and fuller lips.

‘Hey, Pipes.’ Lucie worked on slicing the oranges in half.

She often found herself getting shy around her in recent years, and she knew it was only because she wanted the validation of Brett’s twin that she was a good friend to him.

If she ever put a foot wrong and hurt him, it wouldn’t be Brett’s mum who came after her, it would be Piper.

‘He seems happy here.’

‘I think he is.’

Piper took a second knife out of the drawer and helped her, grabbing a second pitcher while she was at it. They had already been through an entire jug, and it was hot out today. ‘He’s happy with you .’

‘What can I say? I’m a delight to hang out with.’

Piper smirked and took the hint. Lucie didn’t want to discuss their relationship right now.

It was bad enough telling her friends, but they at least shut up when asked.

If Brett’s family knew what was going on, they would never hear the end of it.

They knew Lucie had brewing feelings, but that was all.

The levels of excitement and the badgering would be unbearable if they knew the rest. Of course, they wanted Brett to be happy and they wanted the same for Lucie, but they would fail to see the negatives.

All the reasons it may not work long term.

‘Lucie, seriously, I haven’t seen him this relaxed in years. He hasn’t mentioned missing work once. When I asked him about it, he just shrugged and said he’d get back to it eventually.’ Piper put the knife down. ‘I’m worried that racing isn’t right for him any more.’

‘Not to overstep–’ Lucie started.

‘No, please. Overstep all you like, if anyone’s entitled to disagree, it’s you.’

‘Okay, well, I think you’re wrong. You know your brother as well as I do, so you know that racing is what fuels him.

He’s content now, but it won’t last beyond the summer, he’ll be itching to get back to the team and behind the wheel.

Right now, he just doesn’t want everyone to worry about him any more.

He feels guilty, and he’s scared to tell your sister what’s been happening, but he knows she’s not stupid.

Cleo is fifteen, she sees and hears things. ’