Page 30

Chapter 29

Aria

" W ake up, Aria."

I feel a warm set of lips press against the nape of my neck, sending shivers through my body, causing me to pull the duvet over me more. I can't open my eyes; the sun blinds me when I try.

"Wake up before I fuck you awake."

My eyes ping open and I twist in the sheets, facing an extremely handsome, shirtless Tobias with messy hair. "Tobias...what are you?—"

"I haven't been inside you in weeks. Do we need to have the talk right now? You passed out when I found you last night." He tucks a strand of hair behind my ear, his eyes searching my face. "I just have one question for you." He shifts, pinning me beneath him, his large frame overpowering my fairly slim one. "Did you fuck him?"

"Of course not," I reply, frowning at him. "Why would you think that? I just went to see Jason, showered because I was filthy, and left.

“You showered?” he asks, eyes narrowing. “With him?”

“What? No. I would never do that to you."

"What would you think in my position? If I had gone to an ex's house with my phone turned off?"

His venomous words should be ripping through me, but instead, I feel myself dripping as his mouth lowers to my neck. I struggle to reply or even think of a logical explanation as his tongue runs up my throat.

"What would you do, Aria?" he whispers against my ear, our surroundings heating up, the anticipation between us thickening just like his cock straining in his boxers. "Do I need to fuck the image of him out of you?"

"I..." My words are cut off as Tobias nudges my legs apart, dragging kisses down my chest, leaving trails of wetness down my stomach with his lips, stopping at the waistband of my underwear. Every single hair rises, swirls of heated pleasure running up my spine as his palms press the inside of my knees, spreading my legs further apart.

"I missed how good you taste, Doctor. I’m so fucking mad at you, so I’m going to eat your pussy and stop just before you come, and then I’ll fuck your ass."

I moan softly as he pushes his palms up higher on my thighs, his thumbs pressing against my pussy.

My body reacts to him as he massages around my clit, my thoughts clouded, nerves exploding, heart racing. My body is begging him to please me in ways my fingers can't. Weeks of pleasuring myself to his voice, to his commands–it's all minuscule compared to having him here, gliding his warm tongue over my clit.

I try to tug his hair, but he groans in dissatisfaction and flips me over onto my front. He spreads my cheeks and licks my ass until I’m moaning into my pillow. I arch my back to push my ass against his face, tensing everywhere when his tongue slips into the tight hole and swirls.

A slap to my cheek has me yelping, and he pulls back, stroking himself a few times before lining up with my back hole. “Take a deep breath.”

I don’t do it on time before he forces his cock so hard and fast into my ass, I bite down on my lip until it bleeds, screaming as he pushes my face into the pillow.

“Such a tight ass,” he growls, easing out to the tip and thrusting back in. “So tight and so mine .”

I’m full of him, so full and overwhelmed, but the tightening coil at the base of my spine enjoys the feeling of him fucking my ass, loving the way he pushes my face further into the pillow and thrusts deeper and faster until the headboard slams repeatedly off the wall.

Just before my orgasm hits, he pulls out of my ass, panting so loudly, I don’t need to turn around to know his chest is rising and falling fast, or that his heart is racing.

“You don’t get to come yet,” he warns. “Turn around.”

I kneel in front of him on the bed, tears burning my eyes. Tobias wipes one from my cheek and forces his finger into my mouth. “Can you taste the way you cry? What kind of tears are they, Doctor? Happy, sad, or tears of terror?

I can hear faint echoes in the distance, coming from all directions. My head snaps to the left and right, searching for the noises. They get louder, and Tobias looks around too, then at me.

"Can you hear them?" I ask, and his brows furrow, sucking in his bottom lip as he follows my eyes around the room.

He frowns in confusion. "What can you hear?"

I try to focus, tilting my head as the echoing chimes become more ear-piercing. I feel my heart beginning to race, and not in a heated moment type of way. Instead, I feel like I can't breathe. "It hurts," I say, covering my ears with my hands. The noises are so high pitched, I think my brain might explode.

"Aria, look at me." I refuse, shaking my head as I feel liquid pouring onto my hands, and I begin to scream. "Aria!" Tobias shouts over me, shaking my forearms until I open my eyes. "I can hear it too," he says, taking deep breaths, gesturing with his hand for me to copy him.

I do, in through my nose and out through my mouth, repeating the actions until my heart rate starts to settle and the painful noises start to soften. I lower my hands, expecting to see crimson on my palms, but there's nothing.

"You can hear it?" The chimes become deep, like a drum being blasted with a heavy palm repeatedly. "Where is it coming from?"

The drumming sounds form into a melodic song, and I feel the intense need to raise my hands in the air, shutting my eyes as the beat of Amber Run’s song I Found takes me far away. I rise from the bed, and the house becomes dark, colourful lights lining the floor as I follow them into the bathroom. I'm floating, the floor coming away from me as gravity fights to keep me down, making my way to the floor-length mirrored wall.

"What's happening to you?" Tobias asks, tilting his head. "Do you feel okay?"

"I feel so…happy."

Tobias follows behind, and I can see from the reflection that he's watching me, enjoying the way my hips move as I dance around naked. "I like it when you embrace it," he says, walking to me and grabbing my hips. "If you embrace it, we can share it."

His lips press to mine, and I melt into the kiss, my fingers digging into his hair as he lifts me onto the sink.

"Share it?" I question him, panting against his mouth, feeling his swollen head press against my entrance. "I will share anything with you."

"Anything?" he repeats, the music vanishing to silence but our heavy breathing. "I want you to share yourself with me then, Aria."

I nod, and he grins at me, easing his tip through my slit; the sensation of not having him inside my pussy for weeks has me gripping onto his back muscles. Each inch he shoves into me makes me gasp and dig my nails into his skin.

He stops and pulls out of me, making me wince. "Wait," Tobias says, his voice shaking. "Are you sure you're okay?"

Looking completely lost, he furrows his brows. "I'm fine," I assure him, digging my heels into his thighs so he enters me again.

"Are you..." His words get strangled in his throat as I roll my hips to him, sheathing his cock to the hilt.

His momentary restraint breaks, and he rapidly sinks into me with his teeth attached to my shoulder, sucking and kissing the raw skin before crashing his lips to mine.

"Faster," I blurt out as his thrusts get more intense, burying deep into me, hitting that sweet spot that has me moaning into his mouth. His grip on my ass is a little painful, but I pay more attention to his cock pummelling into me, relentlessly unleashing as he pulls us away from the sink and fucks me against the tiled wall.

My hand flies up to curl around his throat, and I apply more pressure the closer I get to hitting my euphoric state, grinding against his solid shaft as he moves his hips into mine. "Harder," I moan, my back slamming against the wall as Tobias does as I say.

"Fuck," he drawls, sweat coating our bodies as his lips press against mine once more, his tongue pushing into my mouth and running along my own.

I feel overwhelmed, a mix of happiness, pleasure, and warmth filling me. "Tobias..." I try to tell him something important, something I've been wanting to say for weeks now. "I think I..."

"Do you still take your pill?" he cuts me off, his hands moving to behind my knees and carrying me out of the bathroom while I continue to grind against him, stopping a few times against the hallway walls. "Do you?"

"Yes," I breathe, wrapping my arms around his neck and pushing a hand through the hair at his nape, tugging the strands so he lifts his head to look at me.

Pale green eyes stare back at me, and I fall into a deep trance as Tobias lowers me onto my bed, looking down at my exposed body with his cock pumping in his hand. "Bend over." I watch his hand move up and down his length, my eyes tracing the designs of his inked, muscular body.

I'm not sure if I'm hallucinating or what the hell is going on, but Tobias' appearance keeps changing before me. One second, he has tattoos, and then they vanish. His eyes keep flashing between green and blue, confusing the life out of me. His form ripples, and I screw my eyes shut, opening them again to see Tobias leaning over me.

"I want to come in your ass. Bend over," he says more sternly. I listen, shifting so I'm on all fours, watching the headboard in anticipation. "I have something to keep you still," he explains, leaning over me and grabbing a box tied to the corner of my bedpost. He tugs at it, and a restraint comes into view with a cuff attached.

He grabs an exact replica at the other corner of the bedpost, pulling the restraints until he's able to cuff my wrists. I wince as they snap back, my body jerking forward. He grabs my hips, and in one swift movement, he's fully inside me as a whimper drops from my mouth. "Retractable," he says, bending over so his chest is to my back, flicking the tight cords. "You're going nowhere."

How did they get there?

He rolls his hips against my ass, and the angle has him filling me more, my teeth gritting with each thrust. I’ve done anal plenty of times, but it isn’t my favorite. I only tried with Ewan, and he was always slow and gentle, not the way Tobias is nearly ripping me apart with how hard he’s screwing me.

I wince as he pulls out of me and flips me, and my mind is warping as he grabs my throat with strobe lights flashing behind him, my arms above my head, crossed in this position. He leans forward, kissing me deeply as he enters me once more, his cock swelling as my walls start to clench around him.

"Fucking perfect," he groans with each thrust, his teeth sinking into my shoulder as his muscles tense all over, both hitting our highs with force. I shake my head, blinking as my mind plays tricks on me and I see Ewan hovering above me. I feel comfort, enjoying his hands now running down the length of my body.

"I love you, Aria." He looks down at me filled with appreciation and lust, making me internally swoon. "I fucking love you."

I’d know that voice anywhere. The emotions that flood through me relax me in ways I've not been able to for a while now. He always makes me feel safe, at ease with myself when I feel like I'm drowning.

My eyes close as I sink into the comfort of knowing he’s here with me.

"I love you too, Ewan," I moan out, gripping his back muscles as my orgasm reaches its peak.

He halts all movement, his body shaking above me as he leans up, my high vanishing. "What the fuck did you just say?" Tobias snaps at me, his face contorting into something evil. I wince as he jerks out of me, growling, "Ewan?"

I'm speechless, the cuffs tightening as I try to move, watching Tobias step off the bed looking completely demonic. "No, Tobias... I mean you ! "

"Bullshit. I should've known you were still screwing him."

I try to move again, and the restraints nearly snap my wrists. "I promise you, I'm not! I swear, I haven't gone near him in months!"

Shaking his head, Tobias turns and boots my mirror, shards of glass shattering across my floor. "I fucking trusted you!"

I can't handle this, my body shaking with fear, rejection, and confusion. My sobs come out strangled as I attempt to free myself from the restraints that have my anxiety building. "Please, Tobias. Take these off me so I can make this right."

"I've fallen for you, something I, as the fucked-up weird kid, could never do!" My heart breaks as I see his eyes brimming with tears, obvious rage flowing through him as he kicks something across the floor and punches my wall, denting the plaster.

He turns to me, fuming. "I can't lose you... I won't."

"You haven't, Tobias. I swear," I cry, wincing as I try to reach him, the cuffs snapping me back into position. "Please, believe me."

"I trusted you, Doctor. I showed you the threat, and you leapt into his fucking arms. How can we ever be together with him walking around? You have no idea the lengths I've gone just to make you fucking happy!"

He strides over to me, leaning down so both palms settle beside my head, ducking so his lips touch my ear. My heart nearly ceases, his hands running between my breasts and wrapping around my throat. "You're mine. Remember that. I need to take care of the threat since you won't."

I gasp as his mouth presses against mine, claiming me as his. I try to chase his lips when he shoves himself away from me, grabbing his clothes and leaving the house.

Gasping through my tears, I try to force one hand to the other to free my naked self. I cry, my face coated with tears. I turn on all fours, my arms no longer crossed above my head, and I use all the strength I have to reach the buckle with my index finger, but my arm flies back into position. A shooting pain runs up my shoulder. I fail, burying my head in the pillow, and I scream, my heart racing at an unsteady pace.

He’s going to hurt Ewan.

What have I done?

I concentrate on the light flashing on my alarm clock for the next hour, attempting to block out my surroundings that keep mocking me.

Hearing the door slam, I bury my head into the pillow more, sobbing as I struggle with reality. Between the chimes, flashing lights, and Ewan appearing as my boyfriend, I can't take it. I don't know what's real anymore.

"Aria?" I hear Gabriella call my name, listening to her heels clicking along the hallway. "Are you home?"

She gasps as she opens my door, finding my naked body strapped to the bed, glass shattered across the floor, bloody fist marks from Tobias hitting the wall next to the dent.

"What the hell happened?" She hurries forward, ignoring my bent over, naked state as she unbuckles me, throwing a comforter over my exposed body. "Are you okay?" she asks, looking around the room then to my swollen red eyes.

"Tobias." I choke out his name, sobbing into Gabriella's shoulder. "I hurt him. He..."

"You're cold." Gabs lifts me from the bed, her arm wrapped around my back as she helps me into the bathroom, turning on the shower. "Did that asshole hit you?"

I shake my head, my thoughts getting mixed up with what's going on. I hear the chimes again, and I bury my head in my hands. "Make it stop," I beg, the sounds getting louder. "Please," I say once more, grabbing Gabriella's shirt, saliva running down my chin.

She searches my face then uses two fingers to pry open one of my eyes, getting a good look at my pupil. "What are you on?"

"Nothing," I reply, the room starting to spin. The butterflies in my stomach have me seeing the flashing strobe lights of the fairground. I reach my hand out, feeling the wind between my fingers as the speed picks up on the ride.

"Faster," I whisper, the sensation lifting me higher as I start to smile.

I feel a painful sting to my face, and Gabriella is growling at me. "Snap the hell out of it!"

I place my palm to my cheek to ease the raw skin, dropping back against the wall. "Did you just fucking slap me?" I snarl, my rage building.

"I'm calling your mom, Aria. This has gone too far." She shakes her head, concerned, pulling her phone out and tapping away on the screen.

"Mom. Did she go on the rides too?"

She ignores me, placing the phone on the sink as she lifts me from the ground, carrying me into the shower. My body isn't stable enough to hold my own weight right now. Gabs sits me down on the small marble corner seat within the cubicle, soaking herself while she heats my body with the warm water, keeping her hands gentle on my slim frame.

“Ewan has been on the phone with me for days on end, worried sick about you. Your mom too. I think this thing with Tobias needs to end. You’re unwell.”

My eyes widen at his name, and I grab her hands. "I love Tobias."

"No, you're being controlled by him. There's a massive difference between strong emotions and feared mental submission."

I want to hit her, but a part of me is fighting that urge. "You don't even like me. If you care about me, you would want me to be happy." I let go of her hands, shifting away from her. "Who are you?"

"I'm not the threat here. This is," she says, tapping the side of my head. "I need to find out what's?—"

" Ewan is a threat... Ewan is a threat..."

I repeat this chant, no matter how many times Gabs tells me to stop. Even after she dries me and carries me to my room, dodging the glass, she’s dressing me, and I keep the words going like a broken record until I hear the chimes again.

I hear Gabriella’s phone ringing, and she settles me on the couch so she can answer it. "Hey, yeah, she's here. Ewan said she ran out of his house in the night and Tobias found her. I don't know what the hell is wrong with her. Meet me at the hospital? Okay, see you there, Doctor Miller."

I frown at her addressing Mom as she always does, and she grabs my jacket, kneeling in front of me while she pulls the leather up my arms. "Where are we going?" My words come out slurred, and I lick my dry lips, fightingthe urge to bring up my empty stomach.

"We're going to get you help, Aria. We all love you, and we’re going to get you better." Our eyes meet, and I feel a weight lifting from my shoulders, my eyes brimming with tears as I grip her hand in mine. "I know you don't feel like yourself, but I'm never leaving your side again."

My jumbled thoughts become a little clearer, slowly nodding in agreement, and both of us freeze as we hear the door open before slamming shut.

Dad stands in my living room, staring down at my pale face. "What has she taken?" he asks Gabriella, helping her lift me from the couch, each one tucking an arm under my shoulders. "My God, Aria. You’re skin and bones."

Concentrating on the chimes remaining at a soft tempo, I close my eyes and focus on the voices around me, but everything is muffled.

I don't realize we've already gone out to the car, my dad buckling me in. All I see are flashing lights, feeling a heavy bass rattling through my body. Although my mind is hazy and everything seems to be playing in reverse, repeating, slowing down, I try to keep a straight face as Dad drives us to the hospital.

I'm surprised he's here. Being a busy man, tackling every case he can before retirement, he barely has time for his own family.

If they think I'm crazy, and I reckon they already do, I'll be admitted, sent to an institution.

The chimes painfully start to pierce my ears, from my house all the way to the hospital. I keep playing Tobias' words in my head: embrace it. Every time I close my eyes and try to do exactly that, the bell-like sounds fade into something soft and relaxing, releasing me from my torment momentarily before exploding once more, causing me to silently wince.

Embrace it... How do I do that?

With my head on Gabriella's lap, her hand stroking my hair, I watch the clouds in the sky, counting every time we pass a lamp post or traffic light. "Where's Tobias?" I ask, looking up at her in panic. "I hurt him, Gabs. I just slept with Ewan."

She shakes her head. "No, you didn't. Forget about Tobias too; he's not good for you." Her reply is clipped, causing me to frown and shift my position to move away from her. She sighs, tucking her hair behind her ears. "Don't look at me like that. He's been nothing but bad news ever since he came into your life."

"Where are we going?"

"I just want the doctors to run a few tests on you." Her palm lands on my hand, rubbing her thumb along my skin. "Then we can go home and watch movies, okay?"

I nod, lacing our fingers together while I stare at the back of Dad's headrest. I hum I Found to myself, my head tilting to each side as the beat plays quietly.

When we reach the hospital parking lot, Dad helps me as we follow Gabriella through the corridors of the ER, the bright lights burning my eyes. "We can just take her to ward four; it's quiet anyway. Doctor Miller is meeting us there," Gabriella says, looking down at her phone screen as we head to meet my mom.

I feel my stomach twisting, and no matter how much I try to hold it back, my body heaves, and I double over. Bile, and barely any of it, splashes across the floor, the taste rancid, stinging my throat as my eyes water painfully.

Reality seems to keep freezing, causing us to glitch to different parts of the hospital. Every time I feel like I'm back to normal, pressure builds in my head, and the blip in my brain restarts.

Fear...something I don't often feel. Being confident and powerful in my head has always gotten me through the day. I'm terrified of how I'm feeling.

Is this what it's like to be afraid of your own thoughts?

I've never been the type of person to depend on anyone, but right now, I want Tobias—I need him. I know he's mad at me, but I know I can fix this, whatever is going on between us.

They think I can't understand them, their disgusted expressions telling me that these people do not enjoy my company. By the looks of it, they would rather be somewhere else.

I can’t run. I try, but I’m held in place, like there’s glue on my shoes, sticking me to the ground. The world spins, and I feel butterflies as I topple.

I feel a pinch on my arm, a young nurse next to me trying to stick a needle in me. Wincing, I try to pull away from her, but I'm being held down, my heart rate accelerating. With all the hands pressing down on me, I'm suffocating.

The chimes. They are multiplying around me, the flashing lights blinding me as I begin to scream.

Until I feel a stab in my thigh, another sting follows as my eyes slowly close.