Page 33 of Not My Type, Not Yet.

Hours, days and weeks had passed since then. And the time I spend with Knox feels like a blur from yesterday's sweet refrain.

Papalapit na ang sports festival dahil nacancel ito noong nakaraan, timing naman na lumipad ako papuntang Costa Rica kaya hindi ko alam kong ano ang nangyari, I later found out when Knox told me. It's sad but it's a good thing also dahil makikita kong maglaro ang boyfriend ko.

I chuckled with that thought. Boyfriend ko. Yeah, that sounded so much better.

I leaned against the wall, crossed my arms. A small smile tugged at the corner of lips habang nakatingin sa likod ni Knox na nagluluto ng umagahan namin.

Para kaming mag-asawa nito.

“Morning, baby.” I greeted which caught his attention. He looked over his shoulder and smiled when he saw me.

“Morning, unting hintay na lang maluluto na to,” aniya at binalik ang kanyang atensyon sa niluluto nya.

Naglakad ako papunta sa kanya at niyakap ang kanyang beywang mula sa likod. I kissed his neck before burying my face in the crook of his neck.

“I missed you,” I whispered.

Napatawa sya, “Natulog lang tayo eh.”

I nuzzled my face in his neck. “Still…”

Pag balik namin dito sa dorm noong nakaraang linggo I started sleeping in his room, I prefer sleeping next to him.

I love the way his scent enveloped my whole system while keeping me sane lalo na't midterm namin nong nakaraan.

He is my solace, my comfort, and the gentle reminder that when the weight of the world grows heavy, I will always find my home, my peace, within his embrace.

“Kelan laro nyo?” I asked at bumitaw na dahil tapos na syang magluto. Naglagay na ako ng pinggan sa hapag habang nilalapag nya naman ang ulam at kanin namin.

“We don't know yet, dahil finafinalized pa namin kong anong paaralan ang makakalaban namin. But I'll let you know about it, you'll cheer for me baby, right?” He reached for my hand, and kissed the back of it before tilting his head.

I smirked, pulled his necktie and kissed his lips. “Anything for you, baby.” I said and gave him a peck before I pulled away.

He pursed his lips kaya napatawa. “That's a boomer, nabitin ako,” he touched his lips while glancing at me. Napatawa ako when he licked his lips.

“Baka malate tayo pag pinatagal ko pa,” natatawa kong saad kaya napatawa rin sya.

It's true that I can't control myself when it comes to him. If I held him in my arms nagiging makasarili ako to the point na ayaw ko na syang bitawan. I'm greedy, I know that…we both are greedy and we both know it.

I don't want to be greedy right now dahil may klase pa kami baka malate kami pareho pag tinigasan na ako. Oh god, what a weird way to convey my affection.

He shook his head at umupo na. “Let's eat,” aya nya kaya umupo na rin ako at kumain. “Nga pala, I'll be home late later, marami akong dapat na asikasuhin sa council dahil sa sportsfest kaya don't wait up ok?” he informed me kaya tumango ako.

“Want me to bring you your dinner?” I asked. He looked up from his plate and shook his head.

“Don't worry about it,” aniya.

I shrugged my shoulders. “Then it's settled, I'll bring your dinner later---hep hep hep!!” agad na putol ko sa kanya ng maramdaman na tatangi sya. “Just let it be, I don't want my boyfriend to starve ok?” I insisted but he shook his head at the end kaya umasim ang mukha ko.

“No.” Pinal na saad nya. Aalma pa sana ako pero tumayo sya at ngumiti. “Mag aaway ba tayo dahil dito?” he calmly uttered kaya napa tahimik ako.

Umikot sya sa hapag at lumapit sa akin. “Ikaw na muna ang magligpit dito, mauuna na muna ako dahil may meeting pa ako, hmm.” He then kissed my forehead before leaving.

Nakakainis naman, gusto ko lang naman malaman ng iba kong ano ang relasyon naming dalawa without making it obvious…on a second thought parang gusto kong gawing obvious na parang ayaw ko. Pwede bang ganon?

Naffrustrate ako how people assumed na he's still single. Like one time we were at the park and a girl approaches us at ang walang hiyang nilandi si Knox sa harapan ko. Bruh! nandito ang boyfriend nya kaya lumayo-layo ka baka hindi kita matansya.

Yan sana ang gusto kong sabihin but I kept my mouth shut since I figured na ayaw ni Knox na ipaalam sa iba ang relasyong mayroon kami.

It's awful how you can't let the world know that you love each other because your relationship doesn't fit what they deemed as normal. So, no matter how much I wanted the world to know about us, nakakainis man pero tatahimik nalang muna ako.

Bumuntong hininga nalang ako kasabay non isang malalim na buntong hininga ang gumising saakin. Napatingin ako kay Abi na nakadukdok sa upoang katabi ko.

“Ang lalim ha,” kunot noong saad ko. Bumuntong hininga sya ulit.

“Have you ever thought na parang hindi mo kilala ang sarili mo?” she asked and shifted her body to face me.

I raised her an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

She sigh again, umupo sya ng tuwid at pinatong ang kanyang siko sa desk and rested her chin on her palm. She looked like she had a lot going on right now.

“Must be nice to live a blissful and ignorant life,” she muttered and eyed me kaya mas lalong nagkasalubong ang kilay ko.

Pinagsasabi ng isang to?

“What's the matter? hindi bagay sayo maging sad girl kung alam mo lang,” nakangiwing saad ko, matalim nya akong tinignan at hinampas ang braso ko.

“Yaka gago mong animal ka,” singhal nya. I hissed and massage my arm, putangina ang bigat ng kamay ng isang to.

“May Alien dito tas ang pangalan Abigail,” si Joshein na kakadating lang.

Abi rolled her eyes. “Dedma sa bashers, mabasa sana yang plates mo.”

Joshein gasped, exaggerating. “Wag mong ijinx! napaka sama talaga ng ugali mo kaya ka nabubusted eh!” he exclaimed while shielding his plates protectively.

“HINDI AH!!”

Nagulat ako dahil sa biglaang paghampas ni Abi sa desk at sa pagsigaw nya pati sina Joshien at ang iba naming kaklase ay nagulat din dahil sa asal nya. She looked flustered when she realized what she had done. I narrow my eyes. Yep, something's wrong with her.

“Jeez! I was just joking no need to be worked up like that,” ani Joshein at naglakad na papalayo habang yakap-yakap pa rin ang plates nya.

Bumuntong hininga sya at padabog na umupo.

“Something's wrong huh,” I leaned and crossed my arms.

She looked at me for a second before groaning.

“I don't know anymore, I-I'm confused. Hindi ko na alam kong ano ang gagawin ko sa totoo lang.

Some say I should do this do that and I'm on the verge of doing exactly what they told me dahil hindi ko naman kilala ang sarili ko…

and I'm relying to them pero it felt so wrong but I don't know what to do,”Mangiyak-ngiyak nyang saad, napahilamos sya sa kanyang mukha.

I saw the dark circle forming under her eyes and I could totally conclude that she's been stressed lately. I extended my hand and patted her back for comfort.

“You don't have to tell me what's going on dahil baka magbigay ako ng side comment na mas lalong ikakagulo ng utak mo.

Pero, you should try and get to know yourself better.

Because if you don't you'll start absorbing other people's definition of who you really are.

Mahirap pag hindi mo kilala ang sarili mo because you'll start measuring your own worth by other people's approval.”

I glanced at her. She looked at me melancholy and I just nodded my head. “Do what you think is best for you, don't mind the voices around you—listen to your own voice Abigail.” I smiled and patted her head.

She was there when I’m feeling down and lost and it's time to return that favor. I'm not used to seeing her so worn out and lost. Kilala ko sya as makulit at walang kwentang tao. Seeing her so low on energy kind of put me on the edge also.

We tend to give opinions when someone opens up what they really felt and what they've been through. And most of the time we give our own insight about their situation na hindi natin alam na mas kinagugulo pa ng kaninang utak.

Sometimes silence is the best comfort. No words, just synchronized breaths letting them know that you were there—listening.

She smiled weakly, inangat nya ang kanyang kamao at binunggo yun sa braso ko, walang pwersa. “What kind of person do you think I am? you can answer me honestly hindi ako magagalit.”

I narrowed my eyes, hindi magagalit pero pag nagsabi ako ng totoo magagalit sya?

I groan at napahawak sa baba ko, kunwaring nag-iisip ng magandang isasagot sa kanya. Tinignan ko sya sa mata bago ngumisi. “Walang kwentang tao.” I smiled at her sweetly.

Her face turned grim, “Walang hiya ka!”

Agad akong umusog ng makitang hahampasin nya sana ako ulit.

“What's wrong? you asked me and I just answered your question tas ikaw pa tong galit satin?!” Singhal ko dito. She scoffed and looked at me unbelievably.

“Sobrang tino ng tanong ko tas sasabihin mong wala akong kwentang tao? eh kong durogin ko yang ngipin mo!!!” she roared and charged at me, agad akong tumayo at tumakbo.

“Tama naman ako! Sabi mo hindi ka magagalit tas ngayon bat ka galit?!!” sigaw ko habang tumatakbo papalayo sa kanya. She ran towards me like a maniac.

“Ang bobo mo naman! that's your hint to say nice things dahil magagalit ako pag hindi!!!” she yelled. Napangiwi ako, ganun ba yun?

I ran like crazy fearing that my arms would fall once she reached me. Her hands feel ten times heavier than any weight-lifting equipment.

Does all ilongga behaved like this? Ang ganda, ma malambing ang boses pero napaka bigat ng mga kamay!

Oh dear god, pag ako namatay dito mawawalan ng mapapangasawa si Knox!

She chased me down the hallway, ayaw nya pa rin tumigil tas ako namang takot mamatay ng maaga panay ang takbo. I only slowed down when I spotted Knox from the distant.

Bahagya akong napangiti ng makitang nakakunot ang kanyang noo habang nakatingin sa kanyang cliff board. His polo shirt clung to his biceps dahil nirulyo nya yun pataas. His hair slick back, his sharp jaw clicking at any error he saw and encounter.

Bumaba ang tingin ko sa pulsohan nya. Mas lalong lumaki ang ngiti sa labi ko ng makitang suot nya pa rin ang paborito kong relo. Ngayon ko lang napansin na nasa gym na pala kami. The whole counsel is here and other volunteers, decorating every nook and cranny of this annoyingly enormous gymnasium.

“Knox,” I called out, not minding Abigail's presence behind me who's ready to pounce on me if she hadn't seen Knox.

Knox lifted his gaze and looked at me. When he saw me, his eyebrows relaxed. He handed the cliff board to Preston and walked towards me.

“What are you doing here? wala kayong pasok? at bakit pawis na pawis ka?” sunod-sunod nyang tanong. He fished out his handkerchief from his pocket and dabbed it on my forehead.

I held his wrist. “Dito pa sa leeg ko, basa din,” mahinang bulong ko, I guided his hand from my forehead down to my neck without breaking our eye contact.

He looked at me seriously. “Stop it baby, I might devour you right here, right now.” Madiin nyang bulong sa akin. His voice edged with darkness. I smirked.

“Go ahead, Devour me. Let your admirers see how thirsty you are for me,” I grabbed his collar and whispered to his ear. “I would love that…Mr. President.”

Umigting ang kanyang panga, his eyes became darker as he grabbed my collar also. “Don't test my patience Sevilliana, you know damn well that I want you every second. Don't provoke me baby, or you'll be screaming my name in front of these people.”

I chuckled at mas lalo pang nilapit ang kanyang mukha sa akin. “I love it.” I crunched my nose and was about to kiss him when a sharp voice cut through the air, separating us.

“What's going on here? Getting into a fight with a council is a serious offense Mr. Seviliana. I hope you know that.” Tamad kong minata ang babaeng naglalakad papunta saamin.

“Hyacinth, this has nothing to do with you,” Pumunta si Knox sa harap ko. I saw how her eyebrows shot up.

“It does. Malapit na kayong mag suntukan and you expect me to just stand still?” maldita nyang saad. I heard Abi scoffed. Naalala ko may history din pala si Abigail sa babaeng to.

She fixes her bonita glasses. “Come here, stop wasting your time with these low lives,” her voice draped with disgust and contempt. Napataas ang kilay ko, I was about to give her a piece of my mind when Knox spoke first.

“The only low life here is those people who call others low life,” he said coldly. Her eyes widened in shock kahit na ako nanlaki din ang mata ko. Goddamn! that was hot as heck.

Her eyes narrowed. “What did you just say?”

“I said what I said Hyacinth,” he's voice was firm and harsh. She clenched her jaw, looked at me with disgust before turning her back without saying anything.

“Does she hate me?” I pointed at myself.

He craned his neck to see me. “Do you care?” He raised me an eyebrow.

I shrugged my shoulders, I almost wrapped my arms around his waist but I step back and put my hands behind my back.

“I only care about you baby,” I winked at him.

“Ew,” segunda ni Abigail kaya napalingon kami sa kanya na nasa tabi ko lang pala.

Her face contorted with disgust habang pabalik-balik ang tingin sa aming dalawa ni Knox.

“I wish I never hear the things that I heard right now, masyadong nakakasura,” umasim ang mukha nya habang nakatingin sakin kaya tinaasan ko sya ng kilay.

Bitter.

Knox just smirked and handed me his handkerchief. “I need to go, gotta catch up with you later ok?” he said softly. I ruffled his neatly arranged hair.

“Sure, see you.”

Tumalikod na sya at bumalik sa kanyang ginagawa. Napabuntong hininga nalang ako at umalis nalang din don kasama si Abigail. Sa makalawa na ang sports fest kaya busy talaga si Knox ngayon.

Sabay kaming bumuntong hininga ni Abigail kaya nagkatinginan ulit kami. Napailing nalang ako at nagpatuloy sa paglalakad.

Bumaba ang tingin ko sa kamay ko, my jaw clenched as I balled my fist. This is dangerous, I'm getting greedy and I don't think it's healthy.

In a society that condemns your love, the cost is heavier. Because of this greediness of mine I'm afraid I might ruin him and take his ability to shine the mightiest because of the judgement, cruelty and even danger that overshadowed him because of me.

Love deserves to be shown—yes we all know that, but when society tries to weaponize it against you the loss is unmeasurable. The self-confidence, the ability to choose between holding on or letting go is also being questioned.

Kuntento na muna ako sa kung anong meron kami ni Knox. His heart screams my name, mine's aching for his presence. That's all that matters.

Kinagabihan, pagdating ko sa dorm agad akong naligo bago pumunta sa kusina para magluto ng hapunan namin, I wore my black sando and grey pants. Adobo lang naman ang alam kong lutuin kaya yan nalang muna.

Hinanda ko na ang mga sangkap na gagamitin ko sa pagluluto. I sliced the chicken breast into bite size, buo kasi ang nilagay ko dati. Nag improve naman ako, hindi na ako nanonood ng youtube kong paano magluto.

I cock my head. I'm so proud of myself.

Nang matapos akong magluto around 8 pm na ng gabi. I flopped onto the sofa and read some books while waiting kay Knox.

Minutes later bumukas ang pinto at pumasok don si Knox, he massaged his temple and walk straight at me.

“Rough day?” I asked. Dahil nakahiga ako sa sofa he crawled on top of me and buried his face in the crook of my neck. I hugged him at pinatakan ng halik ang noo nya.

“I'm so tired…” he groaned.

I chuckled and caressed his back. “Inaaway ka nila, kawawa naman ang baby ko.”

Mahina syang tumawa at pinatakan ng halik ang leeg ko. “Damn.”

He inhaled my scent, pinatong nya ang kanyang baba sa dibdib ko and purse his lips. “Kiss.” Napailing nalang ako at hinalikan sya.

I snaked my hands behind his head to deepen our kiss. His hands hovered around me while kissing me, I chuckled between our kisses. I parted our lips and kissed his forehead again.

“Kain na tayo?” nakangiting pag-aya ko sa kanya. I cupped his face and gave him a peck. “Nagluto ako, adobo hehe.”

After I mentioned na nagluto ako he eyed me suspiciously kaya napairap nalang ako. “Sure ka? baka matabang na naman yung adobo mo, nadala na ako sa unang luto mo.” He teased me.

“Kinain mo?” I asked, surprised. Malumanay syang tumango.

“Oo, I did baby…” napakagat nalang ako sa labi ko. Tangina…

I hugged him tightly at pinaulanan ng halik ang tuktok ng kanyang ulo. “Fuck.I love you baby,” I uttered full of emotion.

“Palangga taka, halin sang una asta subong. [Mahal kita noon hanggang ngayon]. Kumain na tayo,” nauna syang tumayo at nilahad nya ang kanyang kamay sa harap ko.

I grinned and pulled him back into my arms. “On second thought, mas masarap siguro pag ikaw ang naging hapunan ko…” I jokingly uttered.

Hinampas nya ang dibdib ko. “Ang dami mong havey, gutom na ako kaya tumayo kana dyan!” he pulled himself up na syang ikinahalakhak ko.

“Sabi ko nga kakain na,” saad ko at sumunod sa kanya sa hapag.